ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
> > WITNESS: July 18th.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: What year?
> > WITNESS: Every year.
> >
> > _____________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
> > WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
> > WITNESS: Yes.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
> > WITNESS: I forget.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something You
>forgot?
> >
> > _____________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
> > WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
> > WITNESS: Forty-five years.
> >
> > _____________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that
>morning?
> > WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
> >
> > ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
> > WITNESS: My name is Susan.
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in
>voodoo?
> > WITNESS: We both do.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
> > WITNESS: We do.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: You do?
> > WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
> > sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
> > WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
> >
> > ___________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
> > WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one..
> >
> > ________________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
> > WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?
> >
> > ________________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
> > WITNESS: Yes.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
> > WITNESS: Uh....
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
> > WITNESS: Yes.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
> > WITNESS: None.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
> > WITNESS: By death.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
> > WITNESS: He was about medium height with a beard.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
> > deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
> >
> > WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
> >
> > _______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on
> > dead people?
> > WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go
>to?
> > WITNESS: Oral.
> >
> > _______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
> > WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m..
> >
> > ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
> > WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an
> > autopsy on him!
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
> > WITNESS: Huh?
> >
> > ______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for
> > a pulse?
> > WITNESS: No.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
> > WITNESS: No.
> >
> > ATTORNEY Did you check for breathing?
> > WITNESS: No.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you
> > began the autopsy?
> >
> > WITNESS: No.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
> > WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
> >
> > ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
> > WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
> > practicing law.
> >
> >
> >
> > _______________________________________
> >
> >
> >
> > ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
> > WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
> >
> > ______________________________________
2006-08-28
22:59:21
·
28 answers
·
asked by
Akeysha
2
in
Jokes & Riddles