Entertainment & Music - 6 November 2007

A lonely widow, age 70, decided that is was time to get married again

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:



HUSBAND WANTED:

MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's),

MUST NOT BEAT ME,

MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME

AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!

ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.





On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she

opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheel

chair. He had no arms or legs.

"You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?" the widow said.

"Just look at you! You have no legs!"

The old gentleman smiled, "Therefore, I cannot run around on you!"

"You don't have any arms either!" she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled, "Therefore, I can never beat you!"

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, "Are you still good in bed??"

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, "I rang the

doorbell, didn't I?"

The wedding is scheduled for Saturday.

2007-11-06 17:02:46 · 10 answers · asked by PC 7 in Jokes & Riddles

They say that he was talking about his son's girlfriend. Apparently she was black. Did he have something against her? Is he racist? He sure doesn't seem like it to me. He seems like a pretty cool guy. So is he racist or what? Will he get to keep his show?

2007-11-06 17:02:38 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

rain drops on roses? wiskers on kitten? bright copper kettles? warm woolen mittens? brown paper packages tied up with strings?

2007-11-06 17:02:09 · 10 answers · asked by ~~*Paradise Dreams*~~ 6 in Polls & Surveys

1.An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings currently on display. 'I've got good news and bad news,' the owner replied. 'The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all fifteen of your paintings.'

'That's wonderful!' the artist exclaimed, 'What's the bad news?'. With concern, the gallery owner replied,______________.




what was the gallery owner's reply??

2007-11-06 17:00:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

what is your first reaction?!?!?!?!?!
quick write down ur answer before it kills us all!!!!!!!!!!!! *twitch*

2007-11-06 17:00:20 · 6 answers · asked by Jane 2 in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 17:00:07 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:58:19 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:57:34 · 24 answers · asked by Buddy Hodor 7 in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:57:11 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Reality Television

2007-11-06 16:56:19 · 49 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Where sitting by the fire. My Grandma told your Grandma she was gonna set her house on fire.

2007-11-06 16:54:45 · 4 answers · asked by 2bit 7 in Polls & Surveys

And how old were you at the time?

My earliest memory comes from when I was about 2 years old, I remember my dad flying over our house while I was in the yard, he was a pilot.

2007-11-06 16:52:48 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

I love the smell of cedar.

2007-11-06 16:52:07 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

If you don't agree with it or not one yourself?
OR
would you honor their wishes?

2007-11-06 16:50:51 · 19 answers · asked by kelstar 5 in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:49:17 · 29 answers · asked by Buddy Hodor 7 in Polls & Surveys

if it isn't short already.

2007-11-06 16:49:02 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:48:44 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

I did, and it actually started in middle school. A kid in the next grade up started a rumor about me that I got caught jerking off with Crisco in the bathroom, and the assistant principal (who was female) had to come in and get me. It bothered me a bit, but I usually just played along with it. My nickname became "Crisco Boy" or "Crisco Kid." After awhile, it was shortened to "Cris". People called me that when I was in middle school, and even right up until my junior year in high school, once in awhile, someone would bring it up. I never denied that it happened, nor did I say that it happened. I just let people try to figure it out on their own. Of course, the rumor was false. I didn't even really know how to do that at that age yet.
Sorry about the long story, do you have one?

2007-11-06 16:48:20 · 10 answers · asked by Tikimaskedman 7 in Polls & Surveys

i like to give a card that suits the persons personality or expresses the desired sentiment. i guess i have spent 30/40 minutes looking for the best one.

2007-11-06 16:47:53 · 12 answers · asked by ⓑⓐⓨⓢⓐ ™ 6 in Polls & Surveys

Who Invented the first Electric Guitar (it wasnt Gibson Les Paul he only patented first)
If you dont know just tell me why you have the Blues

2007-11-06 16:46:05 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Blues

2007-11-06 16:44:45 · 19 answers · asked by mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 7 in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:44:31 · 17 answers · asked by Dizzy Miss Lizzie 2 in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:44:10 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-11-06 16:43:45 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

If yes, what made you decide to be one?
If no, why not?

I am an organ donor for the curious.

2007-11-06 16:43:42 · 56 answers · asked by kelstar 5 in Polls & Surveys

How did they came up with that name? Does it mean anything?

2007-11-06 16:42:57 · 4 answers · asked by NeNe 1 in Celebrities

hoping that tomorrow will be better.

2007-11-06 16:40:42 · 56 answers · asked by JůnəßůĢ 6 in Polls & Surveys

*sits down an pouts*

2007-11-06 16:40:39 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

I am thankful that my 10 & 11 yrs old daughters survived a house fire on 12/26/06. After being in the hospital for one month, they were very critical!
I am thankful that I received love & support from family and friends to help the girls adjust.
I am thankful that my girls have very patient teachers, who understand my daughters mood swings.
I am thankful to GOD for allowing me to PERSERVERE and stay strong!!

2007-11-06 16:38:12 · 22 answers · asked by 100% ♥Creole♥ 7 in Polls & Surveys

Sean or Christian? I gotta go with Sean. Christian cannot be trusted and has been with too many women!

2007-11-06 16:37:51 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Drama