Entertainment & Music - 21 October 2007

im a......
a. rat
b. 40ft tall alien
c. to ugly to identify
d. a sea monster with 1 fin, 8 eyes, a mouth with 200 teeth and is only a foot long.

age.....
a. between -50 and 50 years old
b. between 400 and a million
c. i was here before dinosaurs
d. i evolved straight from water (going scientific with that one not religious not meaning to offend anyone)

I'm.....
a. orange
b. blue
c. purple
d. every color of the rainbow

when i grow up i wanna be....
a. world best criminal
b. the first weird thingy to help all other weird thingys accomplish whatever weird thingys need to accomplish
c. a rubberband ball
d. mouthwash

weapon of choice.....
a. camera so i can blind then attack
b. stapler
c. headphones
d. a tooth

i think the asker of this questions has problems...
a. yes
b. no
c. maybe
d. to scared to answer.

2007-10-21 14:03:13 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

question from friends.
and for dino lovers:sex or dinos
dinos or food

2007-10-21 14:02:59 · 2 answers · asked by Lasagna delivery guy 5 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 14:02:13 · 23 answers · asked by misia 5 in Polls & Surveys

This was by far the worst driver ever for car service. The guy didn't care to wait for lights and made sure he was speeding through before the light changed. When he stopped he was making whistling sounds at women in the car and saying sexual innuendos. He asked a black woman cop for directions and screamed "thanks brownie" and drove. He turns to me laughing and says "you see, you and i are the same we don't take **** from blacks." I have a shaved head with a goatee you know the stereotypical neo-nazi look and he thought i was a white supremacist. I have a bald head because I'm balding and shave my head which is well beside the point.

I was so happy to get out of that car at my stop. i reported him to the company and I refuse to ride with them again.

2007-10-21 14:00:42 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Dictionary of Performance Evaluation Comments
Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really saying in all those glowing employee work performance evaluations s/he keeps cranking out.

Accepts new job assignments willingly: Never finishes a job.

Active socially: Drinks heavily.

Alert to company developments: An office gossip.

Approaches difficult problems with logic: Finds someone else to do the job.

Consults with co-workers often: Indecisive, confused, and clueless.

Consults with supervisor often: Pain in the neck.

Displays excellent intuitive judgement: Knows when to disappear.

Happy: Paid too much.

Hard worker: Usually does it the hard way.

Identifies major management problems: Complains a lot.

Indifferent to instruction: Knows more than superiors.

2007-10-21 14:00:08 · 2 answers · asked by ? 4 in Jokes & Riddles

Not how often you should but how often you do.

2007-10-21 13:58:35 · 28 answers · asked by Pip 6 in Polls & Surveys

Bean O? Which do you prefer?

2007-10-21 13:58:31 · 28 answers · asked by cats 7 in Polls & Surveys

During college I worked at a major retailer whose name rhymes with "Paycee Jenny's." I worked in the women's plus-size department; and that area brought quite a bit of stress. I was not a plus size and I was in my early twenties (but looked like a seventeen-year-old) -- and both of those factors convinced my customers that I did not know the merchandise nor did I know what I was talking about. I also had several other associates in the area who were not the best. The one involved in this story was older -- in her sixties, I think -- and she did whatever she could to be rude and belittle me in front of customers. I normally dealt with this by avoiding her and ignoring her. (She was like this to a lot of the employees, so I wasn't singled out, which made it easier.)

One Saturday, the store was crowded (and grossly understaffed, as usual) with our typical motley crew: white trash, bored and snotty suburban housewives, ghetto denizens, and others. The store was hot and I was at the register ringing people up as fast as I could, but there was still a long line of rude people pissed because they had to wait. (Hey, if you don't want to wait in line, don't ******* shop at a mall on a Saturday afternoon!)

My register counter was open on my side and attached to a pillar, on which was a hook where we hung clothes that required a hanging bag. The register itself was on the far right side, snuggled against the pillar. My co-worker -- let's call her "Pissy" -- was bagging items and repeatedly telling me that I was screwing up my ringing. I wasn't. The customers were even more unpleasant, thinking that I was overcharging them.

A woman came up behind me and sat on a chair next to the register. It was a standard metal chair that had been placed there earlier in the morning to stack boxes on while unloading merchandise. I asked her (politely) to please move, as she was next to the register and blocking the hook on which I needed to put clothes. She refused -- her feet were tired, she said. I asked again. Not only did she refuse, she said something snotty to her friend in Spanish. I really could have called security, but I had too much else going on.

The next customer was very rude as well. Pissy was being, well, you know. I had this other wretch on a chair, right where my register was, disrespecting me. And I had about a hundred people interrupt me with stupid questions. The stress and turmoil were really starting to affect me.

Flashback: I love chocolate milk. I really do. I used to have a milk allergy, which then evolved into lactose intolerance. Which means certain that while kinds of dairy are okay, chocolate milk is not. My dad had purchased a big glass bottle of it, and before I came into work that afternoon, I had a very small glass -- about four ounces, if that.

Flash forward to me in anger and stress behind the counter. Deep in my intestines, my chocolate milk was ready to fight for me -- perhaps as a conciliatory gesture to make up for all my love it was unable to return. As the rudeness and disrespect escalated, the churning in my tummy became more intense. There was a lactose fist at the door, and it was chanting to me, "I think you hear me knocking, and I think I'm coming out, and I'm bringing the big, bad SBD with me!"

The big, bad is SBD is the lethal concoction which is really about my only kind of fart. No rattlers for me! The stench is worse than **** sometimes; and while I try to keep it in, it was about to be used as a tool to fashion revenge.

I let a small one go. It really did stink, smelling just like a pebble of poo might. I let another go. And then another.

And they began to make a difference.

The stink ripped through the air and covered the nasal passages. I moved around to spread the wealth. I backed up and farted on the ***** in the chair while bending over to get a bag. She replaced her smirk with a fanning of her nose with her hand, a disgusted look, and a giggle. And then she left. I bent over to pick up something off the floor and let one fly in Pissy's face. "Do you have gas?" she asked.

"No, I don't," I said innocently, with wide eyes. "Do you smell something?" The customer at the counter crinkled her nose in disgust. Meanwhile, the green fumes from my *** had, no doubt, formed a Jolly Roger; he was cackling maniacally with me.

I was perpetually in motion -- farting on Pissy, farting on anyone behind me, just farting in general. My *** had become a fine-tuned weapon, exacting justice on those who had wronged me.

After a few minutes, my colon declared a ceasefire, and some semblance of peace was restored to the fart-riddled battlefield. I triumphantly walked to the employees' bathroom for a well-deserved ****, with a spring in my step and a song in my heart. Pissy's shift was over. Another associate arrived. The crowds slowed as the evening wore on. I spent the rest of my shift folding sweaters and cleaning out fitting rooms. After the store had closed, I had to hurry home -- I had a hot date with chocolate milk.

2007-10-21 13:56:56 · 11 answers · asked by Komedian 4 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-10-21 13:56:44 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 13:56:10 · 11 answers · asked by Veruca Salt 6 in Polls & Surveys

Id watch All that,wild and crazy kids,are you afraid of the dark,etc. captain planet lol

2007-10-21 13:55:49 · 5 answers · asked by ChuckDeucez 6 in Polls & Surveys

to be a bartender? why?

2007-10-21 13:55:13 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Is there some special significance behind it??

2007-10-21 13:54:32 · 39 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

it wasn't really scary it was more suspenseful to me...

2007-10-21 13:54:18 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 13:54:17 · 17 answers · asked by eve92075 2 in Polls & Surveys

Which is most important?

2007-10-21 13:53:53 · 42 answers · asked by cats 7 in Polls & Surveys

Letters Of Recommendation
Have to write a letter of recommendation for that fired employee? Here are a few suggested phrases:

For the chronically absent:
"A man like him is hard to find."
"It seemed her career was just taking off."

For the office drunk:
"I feel his real talent is wasted here."
"We generally found him loaded with work to do."
"Every hour with him was a happy hour."

For an employee with no ambition:
"He could not care less about the number of hours he had to put in."
"You would indeed be fortunate to get this person to work for you."

For an employee who is so unproductive that the job is better left unfilled:
"I can assure you that no person would be better for the job."

For an employee who is not worth further consideration as a job candidate:
"I would urge you to waste no time in making this candidate an offer of
employment."
"All in all, I cannot say enough good things about this candidate or
recommend him too highly."

For a stupid employee:
"There is nothing you can teach a man like him."
"I most enthusiastically recommend this candidate with no qualifications
whatsoever."

For a dishonest employee:
"Her true ability was deceiving."
"He's an unbelievable worker."

2007-10-21 13:53:47 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Something to cheer me up and make me smile.. There are 10 points in it for the best joke!

2007-10-21 13:53:22 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-10-21 13:52:33 · 34 answers · asked by eve92075 2 in Polls & Surveys

*You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked

*You grind your coffee beans in your mouth

*You sleep with your eyes open

*You have to watch videos in fast-forward

*You lick your coffee pot clean

*Your eyes stay open when you sneeze

*The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse

*You can type sixty words a minute with your feet

*You can jump-start your car without cables

*Your only sources of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low"

*You don't sweat, you percolate

2007-10-21 13:51:19 · 10 answers · asked by ? 4 in Jokes & Riddles

It is 2:50am here.

2007-10-21 13:51:19 · 47 answers · asked by Bella ♥ Italiana 5 in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 13:50:55 · 13 answers · asked by eve92075 2 in Celebrities

2007-10-21 13:50:30 · 13 answers · asked by joezen777 5 in Polls & Surveys

I love linkin park and Chester the lead singer.

2007-10-21 13:50:10 · 13 answers · asked by Hi hi hi 2 in Celebrities

Bush Presidential Library Destroyed By Flood
Crawford, Texas -- A tragic flood this morning destroyed the
personal library of President George W. Bush. The flood began in
the presidential bathroom where both books were kept. Both his
books have been lost. A presidential spokesman said the president
was devastated, as he had almost finished coloring the second one.
The White House tried to call FEMA, but there was no answer.

2007-10-21 13:49:57 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2007-10-21 13:49:27 · 23 answers · asked by joezen777 5 in Polls & Surveys

is my bf normal? are the people on ebay buying toilet paper rolls normal? help! im scared!

2007-10-21 13:49:13 · 42 answers · asked by Giggle Bear 3 in Polls & Surveys

Or movies like that.

2007-10-21 13:48:57 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-10-21 13:47:44 · 20 answers · asked by I SAID SO 3 in Polls & Surveys

I'm a leo =]

2007-10-21 13:47:02 · 48 answers · asked by ☼ kayla ☼ 5 in Polls & Surveys