Entertainment & Music - 10 December 2006

2006-12-10 01:08:05 · 19 answers · asked by jennifer g 7 in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-10 01:07:47 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-10 01:07:14 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

A lady goes to her parish priest one day and tells him, "Father,
I have a problem. I have two female parrots but they only know
how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest inquired.
"They say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some
fun?" "That's obscene!" the priest exclaimed, "I can see why you
are embarrassed." He thought a minute and then said, "You know,
I may have a solution to this problem. I have two male parrots
whom I have taught to pray and read the Bible.

Bring your two parrots over to my house and we will put them in
the cage with Francis and Job. My parrots can teach your parrots
to praise and worship. I'm sure your parrots will stop saying
that...that phrase in no time." "Thank you," the woman
responded, "this may very well be the solution."

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's
house. As he ushered her in, she saw this two male parrots were
inside their cage, hold their rosary beads and praying.
Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them.
After just a couple of seconds, the female parrots exclaimed out
in unison, "Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some
fun?"

There was a stunned silence. Finally, one male parrot looked
over at the other male parrot and said, "Put the beads away,
Francis, our prayers have been answered!"

2006-12-10 01:06:15 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

I made a playlist of 16 songs. All songs were burnable to a CD except the 5 I just bought by George Jones.
On "tips" it said to purchase each song as an individual track. I did not see how to do that; just purchase and transfer to "My Music".
HELP!
I want to make the entire 16 songs burn to a CD. (I can except the 5 by George Jones.)
I thought once I bought them, they were automatically burnable to a CD!
I also did not see where I could "import" those 5 to make them burnable to CD.

2006-12-10 01:06:12 · 1 answers · asked by David T 1 in Music

2006-12-10 01:05:36 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

I am a total Greenday fan and Billie Joe is so hot

2006-12-10 01:04:21 · 2 answers · asked by marissajo2112 1 in Celebrities

On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"

To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

2006-12-10 01:03:54 · 11 answers · asked by eeyoree rocks2003 7 in Polls & Surveys

If so why?

2006-12-10 01:03:29 · 27 answers · asked by Raziel 3 in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-10 01:03:24 · 10 answers · asked by Paloma R 1 in Television

I already have
▀ Rocing around the Christmas tree
▀ Let it snow
▀ Santa baby
▀ Winter wonderland

Please name some..x

2006-12-10 01:03:09 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

♥

2006-12-10 01:02:45 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Did anybody notice on last nights Robin Hood that some bloke was wearing ex U.S army combat trousers? Can the Beeb not afford Robin Hood time trousers?

2006-12-10 01:02:40 · 5 answers · asked by Neil555 2 in Television

2006-12-10 01:01:54 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Television

Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings; they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

If you can stay calm while all around you there's chaos, then you probably haven't completely understood the seriousness of the situation.

Doing a job right the first time gets the job done. Doing the job wrong 14 times gives you job security.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity.

A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.

Plagiarism saves time.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.

Teamwork means never having to take all the blame yourself.

We waste time, so you don't have to.

Hang in there, retirement is only 30 years away!

Go the extra mile. It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker.

A snooze button is a poor substitute for no alarm clock at all.

When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break.

Indecision is the key to flexibility.

Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, Avoid Disappointment

2006-12-10 01:01:34 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

why?

2006-12-10 01:00:20 · 19 answers · asked by jennifer g 7 in Polls & Surveys

The greatest truck driver in the world was driving along a country lane late one night when his truck broke down. All he could see was a faint light in the distance, so he headed towards it.

He came to an old farmhouse and knocked on the door. "Hello," he says, "I'm the greatest truck driver in the world and my truck has broken down. I wonder could I have a bed for the night?"

"Well," says the farmer, "there's only two rooms, myself and the wife in one, and my young daughter in the other."

"Look, I'm the greatest truck driver in the world and all I want is a bed for the night, your daughter will be as safe as a house," says the greatest truck driver in the world.

"Okay," says the farmer, and they all went to bed.

At four in the morning, the farmer hears the headboard next door banging against the wall. He got up, looked in, and there was the greatest truck driver in the world driving it into his daughter, with his bare a-s-s going up and down.

The farmer went downstairs and loaded the shotgun. He snuck into the room and shoved the shotgun up the greatest truck driver in the world's a-s-shole. "Okay," he says, "if you're the greatest truck driver in the world, try and reverse out of there with a full load!"

2006-12-10 00:59:59 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

While fixing to make my morning cup of coffee,I reached over to get the sugar dish on the counter.Finding it empty
I got a 5 lb bag from the cabinet, opened it and dropped it.

I just had 5 lbs of sugar all over my countertops,microwave
in my toaster and even on the floor. I think next time its Tim Horton's or Dunkin doughnuts.

Tell me one of your stupid stories to ease my frustration and entertainment.

2006-12-10 00:59:51 · 8 answers · asked by John 5 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-12-10 00:59:37 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjjiXnFxNJGJF5vyn8Z6TWvsy6IX?qid=20061208202543AA4Mgvv

I did lmao...

2006-12-10 00:58:42 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

How many 'episodes' of this series have been published ? and is there a website that lists them all from the first to the latest editions.

2006-12-10 00:58:35 · 3 answers · asked by IRunWithScissors 3 in Comics & Animation

What's stopping you?

2006-12-10 00:56:47 · 20 answers · asked by zen 7 in Polls & Surveys

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps onto the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.

The bartender screams at the guy "Did you see what your monkey just did?"

The guy says "No, what?"

"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!"

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff". He finishes his drink, pays his bill and leaves.

Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him.

He orders a drink and the monkey starts running round the bar again.

While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his ***, pulls it out, and eats it.

The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?", he asks.

"No, what?" replies the guy.

"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his a-s-s, pulled it out, and ate it!" says the bartender.

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me", replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures everything first."

2006-12-10 00:55:49 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

2006-12-10 00:55:23 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Q .. How do blonde braincells die?
A .. Alone.

Q .. How do you brainwash a blonde?
A .. Give her a douche and shake her upside down.

Q .. How do you drown a blond?
A .. Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.

Q .. How do you drown a blond?
A .. Leave a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

Q .. How do you describe a blonde, surrounded by drooling idiots?
A .. Flattered.

Q .. How do you confuse a blonde?
A .. You don't. They're born that way.

Q .. Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven?
A .. She didn't know what number came first.

Q .. What do you call a blonde with 90% of her intelligence gone?
A .. Divorced.

Q .. How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
A .. She threw it off a cliff.

Q .. How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
A .. She fell out of the tree.

2006-12-10 00:53:24 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

I have a copy(vinyl) of Steve Miller Band's Greatest Hits 1974-1978. The latest copyright date is 1978. Side one plays normally. But side two is supposed to have 7 songs. The album sleeve and the sticker on the record say so. But there are only 5 when you play it. "Threshold" and "Jet Airliner" are just plain not on there.

I am wondering if it has any worth of if you know where i may be able to find out online.

2006-12-10 00:53:16 · 2 answers · asked by .. 3 in Music

i just got a 12 month membership to a gym, and i love the gym and i love the people there but now this 40yr old+ man follows me around and keeps talking to me. i try not to be rude because he's not very threatening but just annoying with his constant following and his lame small talk and cheesy grins...
what do you reckon i should do? i'm not changing gym's because i just paid for the new membership and i'm not a rude person so i don't know what to say to him. i just usually put my ipod in my ears and sort of pretend i can't notice when he's around.

also it's worth a mention that he suddenly comes at the same time i'm at the gym. i could possibly try to go at a different time but it screws my whole timetable.

2006-12-10 00:53:13 · 9 answers · asked by natalia 4 in Polls & Surveys

i own yahoo.com !!!!!

heheh :) ???

2006-12-10 00:53:03 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-12-10 00:51:52 · 38 answers · asked by Shaky 2 in Other - Entertainment

Do you have any?
Do you want any?

Was the 1st and "Accident"

I had the strangest dream last night, this girl from my old highschool was having a child, and it was mine. Which is strange on so many levels.

But anyway do you want children and why or why not?

2006-12-10 00:51:01 · 12 answers · asked by Raziel 3 in Polls & Surveys