A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps onto the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
The guy says "No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff". He finishes his drink, pays his bill and leaves.
Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him.
He orders a drink and the monkey starts running round the bar again.
While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his ***, pulls it out, and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?", he asks.
"No, what?" replies the guy.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his a-s-s, pulled it out, and ate it!" says the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me", replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures everything first."
2006-12-10 00:55:49 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
lmao
2006-12-10 01:00:58 · answer #1 · answered by Des 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm printing this one up to tell the girls to-morrow night, thanks again for a good all round laugh.
2006-12-12 23:09:16 · answer #2 · answered by glasgow girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THAT WAS TO FUNNY LMAO. I NEVER HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE.
2006-12-11 08:47:54 · answer #3 · answered by ♥♥♥you rock my world ♥♥♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol. one of my funny jokes! NICE!!!
2006-12-10 17:42:17 · answer #4 · answered by FP 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
heard it before but its still funny!!!!
2006-12-10 09:12:23 · answer #5 · answered by booyah™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL. LOL. Learned something, did he?? LOL.
2006-12-10 18:22:24 · answer #6 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahas
2006-12-10 09:24:05 · answer #7 · answered by m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol so funny.
2006-12-11 16:19:46 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
total pisser mate LMAO.
2006-12-10 08:59:57 · answer #9 · answered by Blah Blah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was hilarious!!
2006-12-10 10:18:53 · answer #10 · answered by ♥Stranger In Maine™♥ (Thriller) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋