Ok, I'm finding it VERY hard to figure out the "stressed" and "unstressed" words... I tried to give this poem some...idk... pattern or something. What i did was the first stanza has 5 syllables per line, then the second one has 6 syllables per line. Then the third stanza has 5 syllables per line, and the last stanze has 6 syllables per line.
so i attempted to do this 5,6,5,6 syllable thing...idk... i don't think it works. I don't get how to mark the stressed and unstressed syllables... so idk if they're in the correct order...
but does this seem to make sense? :
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Fading into black,
becoming nothing.
Disappearing quick,
attempting to breathe.
To see becomes hard,
sinking seems about right,
that's all I'm doing.
Finding the purity,
it appears difficult.
Wondering aimlessly,
like some lonesome, old fool.
The black seems to cover,
all that really mattered.
Being lost seems so clear.
Quivering hands search,
for an opening,
where some hope remains.
Such a hard task here,
might I survive this?
A lack of faith here,
dying comes easy.
Having to think quickly,
I’ve taken the wrong path.
It was an accident,
that cannot be erased,
or simply forgotten.
Continue to search hard,
For the small speck of light.
I’ll find it one day,
just not at the moment.
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So what do you think?? Does it seem to flow well?
2007-05-15
03:43:25
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