1.“If my heart were a baked potato, I’d serve it to you with extra butter and sour cream.”
2.“Your terrible personality isn’t so terrible after a few drinks and even when I sober up, it’s not as terrible as everyone says.”
3.“I’d shave my entire body with a dull, rusty razor blade and take a vinegar bath for you.”
4.“I am rubber, you are glue, any feelings you have for me bounce off and stick to you. Ironically, I feel the same way.”
5.“The other day I saw this little girl day drop her whole ice cream cone on the ground and start bawling. After I stopped laughing, I thought, “I’m the same way when you don’t call hen you say you will.”
6.“I saw you in the morning, on the toilet, and I didn’t run screaming. So there.”
7.“Hug me. If you let go -- you lose.”
8.“Umm… like… you and me? Yeah. You and me.”
9.“You are to me what an eye patch and parrot is to a pirate.”
10.“You are the hole in my donut.”
11.“I am the pork, you are the beans.”
2007-01-19
04:43:49
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12 answers
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asked by
allgiggles1984
6
in
Jokes & Riddles