1. you could do worse
2. I’ll work so hard you wont even know I’m there
3. I’ll need all my paid annual leave up front so I’ll be rested when I start
4. you cant turn me down because I smell bad. You have to have a reason
5. that big thing growing on my face isn’t my fault
6. I don’t do drugs anymore, I swear
7. i can go all day without peeing once
8. i wont sue you when you fire me
9. my arrest record is all a bunch of lies
10. i was a sniper in the army
11. i can make explosives from Windex, white out , and photocopier toner
12. you don’t have the BALLS to hire someone like me!
13 if you hire me I’ll shut up. that’s all I can promise for sure, but maybe it will be better than that and I will sure try
14. dont go checking into my record. But if you do she swore she was 18
15. i don’t hear the voices in my head anymore. Do not. Do not. Do not. SHUT UP!
16. if you give me the job your ok, but if you don’t you suck
17. i don’t do applications
18. if I work here I’ll wear the stupid uniform as long as I can wear any kind of underwear I want
19. I won’t have to do anything will I?
20. can I bring my goat to the company day care center?
21. I collect guns. You probably want to tell me that I got the job now, right?
22. I’m not what? Oh yeah? Well here’s what you can do with your damned job…
2006-08-24
08:14:36
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14 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Jokes & Riddles