Entertainment & Music - 9 November 2007

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely,

P. Niss

The Response

Dear Penis:
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the
correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely,

V. Gina

2007-11-09 20:35:52 · 22 answers · asked by hotbutteredpancakes 3 in Jokes & Riddles

15 ⤊

do you mind your p's and q's?

do you know what your p's and q's are? (yes, i mind mine, and yes, i know what they are.)

2007-11-09 20:29:49 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

0 ⤊

greatest romantic music clip?

whats your greatest romantic music video?
for me its i'll stand by you bu the pretenders..

2007-11-09 20:28:00 · 3 answers · asked by ~krish~ 3 in Polls & Surveys

1 ⤊

Have you heard the one about the fly???

In the dead of summer a fly was resting on a leaf beside a lake. The hot, dry fly who said to no one in particular, "Gosh... if I go down three inches I will feel the mist from the water and I will be refreshed."

There was a fish in the water thinking, "Gosh... if that fly goes down three inches, I can eat him."

There was a bear on the shore thinking, "Gosh... if that fly goes down three inches. That fish will jump for the fly and I will grab him."

It also happened that a hunter was farther up the bank of the lake preparing to eat a cheese sandwich... "Gosh," he thought, "if that fly goes down three inches... and that fish leaps for it... that bear will expose himself and grab for the fish. I'll shoot the bear and have a proper lunch."

You probably think this is enough activity on one bank of a lake, but I can tell you there's more...

A wee mouse by the hunter's foot was thinking, "Gosh... if that fly goes down three inches... and that fish jumps for that fly... and that bear grabs for that fish... the dumb hunter will shoot the bear and drop his cheese sandwich."

A cat lurking in the bushes took in this scene and thought, as was fashionable to do on the banks of this particular lake around lunch time ~ "Gosh... if that fly goes down three inches and that fish jumps for that fly and that bear grabs for that fish and that hunter shoots that bear and that mouse makes off with the cheese sandwich. Then I can have mouse for lunch."

The poor fly is finally so hot and so dry that he heads down for the cooling mist of the water. The fish swallows the fly. The bear grabs the fish. The hunter shoots the bear. The mouse grabs the cheese sandwich. The cat jumps for the mouse. The mouse ducks. The cat falls into the water and drowns.

The moral of the story: Whenever a fly goes down three inches some pussy is in serious danger.

2007-11-09 20:26:17 · 8 answers · asked by me here, where are you? 3 in Jokes & Riddles

3 ⤊

is there an exquisite pleasure in misery?

misery, melancholy, spleen ... you name it. that fall thing. i thought it would never get me but now i'm indulging in it. do you?

2007-11-09 20:25:46 · 14 answers · asked by sarah kay 5 in Polls & Surveys

3 ⤊

What is the name of the song with a guy singing "shake it, shake it sugar, shake it like a ??"?

Also, who sings this song? I can't think of any more words to the song, grrrrrrr.

2007-11-09 20:21:44 · 3 answers · asked by 🐭 cat™ 🐭 7 in Lyrics

12 ⤊

When you see a blank piece of white paper... ?

...how do you cope?

2007-11-09 20:21:17 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

16 ⤊

What'd you first do if you woke up as the opposite sex?

2007-11-09 20:15:21 · 19 answers · asked by Schumi 5 in Polls & Surveys

10 ⤊

POLL: Should a guy get a piercing, yes or no?

if so where?

[I've been told before "guys shouldnt get pierced. period.]
what do you think?

2007-11-09 20:15:18 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

13 ⤊

OK. local talk survey. the first meal of the day is breakfast, i think we can all agree on that.?

now, the noon meal, is it lunch or dinner
and the last meal, is it dinner or supper or what?

where i grew up, it was breakfast, lunch and supper
up here, it is breakfast, lunch and dinner.
what is it where you are?

2007-11-09 20:13:52 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

0 ⤊

How do you get music without lyrics in it for a song?

When i say this i mean without words just the music and beat.

2007-11-09 20:12:05 · 1 answers · asked by Reggie #25 1 in Other - Music

8 ⤊

Are you awake before you're up, or up before you're awake?

2007-11-09 20:11:23 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

10 ⤊

Do you learn something new everyday?

2007-11-09 20:11:17 · 33 answers · asked by wolflady 6 in Polls & Surveys

0 ⤊

how do you extend a question answering time on yahoo questions?

2007-11-09 20:11:10 · 2 answers · asked by mattnexus 1 in Polls & Surveys

11 ⤊

Ok, who was " mumblin' to some howlin' wolf about some voodoo healin' "?

2007-11-09 20:09:20 · 9 answers · asked by rockman 7 in Blues

0 ⤊

I would like to thank...?

Evil fury and ... for the cheap entertainment , who would you like to thank today?

2007-11-09 20:09:07 · 6 answers · asked by I Speak the Truth 5 in Polls & Surveys

1 ⤊

Any sword collectors out there?

2007-11-09 20:08:29 · 5 answers · asked by wolflady 6 in Polls & Surveys

0 ⤊

what is your life's stand-by generator?

2007-11-09 20:07:02 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

3 ⤊

What/who woke up with you this morning..?

2007-11-09 20:04:16 · 28 answers · asked by Heartbreak kid 5 in Polls & Surveys

0 ⤊

whats this song?

Sorry dont have much info but it is a country song and was in the film A Fight For Justice, its a female singer and some of the lyrics are ,
Don't tell me about yr business meetings
Don't tell me ...................
So I think it is called Dont tell me as she says it a lot but its not Pam Tillis
Thanks in advance for any answers.

2007-11-09 20:04:02 · 4 answers · asked by suzanne w 2 in Country