Entertainment & Music - 15 August 2006

I've been told these are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. Yeah, sure.

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.


4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 storeys, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy! comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. travelling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighbourhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

26. Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.

27. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.

28. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

2006-08-15 18:01:25 · 6 answers · asked by Dew Drop 3 in Jokes & Riddles

what is the answer for this anagram- KJSAE?????

2006-08-15 18:01:24 · 12 answers · asked by ammu 1 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-08-15 18:01:22 · 5 answers · asked by dark^wishy 4 in Movies

Thanks! peace

2006-08-15 18:01:18 · 9 answers · asked by invader_zim0070 1 in Music

There are three words in the English
language that end in "gry". ONE is angry and the other is hungry.
EveryONE
knows what the third ONE means and what it stands for. EveryONE uses
them
everyday, and if you listened very carefully, I've given you the third
word.
What is it? _______gry?

2006-08-15 18:00:06 · 8 answers · asked by Anubhav~~!! 3 in Jokes & Riddles

Howlin' Wolf and Jim Morrison sang a song called Back Door Man and there is a lyric that references the term Back Door Man as being something men don't know and the girls understand...so, as my being a man, I have no clue what they mean. Can someone help me out?

2006-08-15 17:59:12 · 7 answers · asked by BigWurster 4 in Music

i dated a guy who was paranoid about the drive thru and we always had to go in i was just curious if any one else did this?

2006-08-15 17:58:58 · 15 answers · asked by evian 6 in Polls & Surveys

2006-08-15 17:58:57 · 12 answers · asked by heidielizabeth69 7 in Polls & Surveys

2006-08-15 17:58:28 · 4 answers · asked by Jumping Jack Flash 3 in Music

A woman is on a date with a big, strong, muscular guy.

At the end of the date they start making out. Things start to get hot and heavy, and in the middle of it, the girl decides she's not into it. "Stop," she says, but the guy seems not to hear her. "Get off me!" she finally shouts.

The guy stops, jumps up, rips off his shirt, and starts flexing his muscles.

"What the hell are you doing?" asks the girl.

The guy stops and says, "I thought you just told me to 'Get Awesome!'"

2006-08-15 17:58:16 · 6 answers · asked by Dew Drop 3 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-08-15 17:58:13 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Give me the low down on these flicks & what is worth paying to see

Me, you & Depree
Little Man
Zoom
Nacho Libre
Click
My super ex girlfriend
Clerks II
World Trade Center

2006-08-15 17:58:01 · 12 answers · asked by sbeaz 2 in Movies

I loved Mr. Clean when I was about 4. I would go to the store with my mom and make her get Mr. Clean products. I think that is where my fetish for bald men started.

2006-08-15 17:57:50 · 13 answers · asked by Lacey 5 in Polls & Surveys

This question was inspired while watching the Justice League. I have a few favorites, but if I had to choose only one it would be Dr. Strange's costume. Its cool.

I also like Blade's costume. Wesley Snipes' Blade or Blade The Series costume.

The new Black Panther costume is slick as well.

Always liked Batman's and Thor's too.

2006-08-15 17:57:35 · 15 answers · asked by hndsmenmiami 2 in Comics & Animation

i made this quiz too see how many people pay attention to back to the future.if u do not answer one of the questions u will not win.the winner gets chosen as best answer and gets some thing cool that im going to email them.u can look it up before taking the quiz but keep in mind that im closing the question after ten answers so dont take too long.good luck.

1)who was the first too time travel in the time machine?
2)who made the time machine and why did they make it(in other words what time did they want to go in)?
3)how many kids did marty have in the future?
4)what happend in 1985 that sent martys live straight down the tube.
5)what happend to the time machine at the end?
6)how many times did the time machine go through time?
7)how many times did the dog travel throught time?
8)how many times did marty go throught time.
9)how many times did doc go through time?
10)what did doc do with his live at the end of part three.
11)why did they go back to 1955 in part two?

2006-08-15 17:57:35 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

A lesson regarding the value of a couple of aspirin!


A guy is out with buddies and has few drinks. He is feeling a little frisky, but true to his wife, goes home.


He finds her sound asleep in bed with her mouth wide open, so he gets two aspirin and drops them in her mouth.


She starts to choke, but recovers and asks, "What did you put in my mouth?"

He says, "Two aspirin."


She replies, "BUT I DON'T HAVE A HEADACHE!"


He says, "That's all I wanted to hear"

2006-08-15 17:57:01 · 15 answers · asked by Sangy . 4 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-08-15 17:55:59 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2006-08-15 17:55:32 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

When was the last time you saw her in a movie?

2006-08-15 17:55:19 · 4 answers · asked by Sicilian Godmother 7 in Celebrities

its shape does change,bright it can be,scary at times,beautiful at times....what is it.?

2006-08-15 17:54:37 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Does anyone know what are his upcoming projects?

2006-08-15 17:53:24 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Movies

2006-08-15 17:52:55 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

A very unattractive, mean actin' woman walks into Wal-Mart with her two kids.

The Wal-Mart Greeter asks, "Are they twins?"

The ugly woman says, "No, the oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why? ... Do you think they really look alike?"

"No", replies the greeter, "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice!"

2006-08-15 17:52:33 · 8 answers · asked by Woody 3 in Jokes & Riddles

It's for Thursday at the Trump Taj Mahal in Atlantic City. Do you think someone will buy it at the door, or even somewhere at the venue? Or, is it even illegal? (I dont want to be arrested.) I just want to get this off my hands.

2006-08-15 17:51:55 · 22 answers · asked by dj_feva 2 in Music

Could someone give me a link of the science fiction story "A deepness in the sky" by Vernor Vinge so that I can read it online without buying the book?

Thanks a lot

2006-08-15 17:51:54 · 1 answers · asked by hustlf4 1 in Other - Entertainment

then you sign up for it. whats that called?

2006-08-15 17:50:27 · 3 answers · asked by blazingstar10 1 in Movies

What was she on when made this asinine declaration? Both these women exude class and sophistication, while Paris is just slumming it for respectability.

2006-08-15 17:50:24 · 10 answers · asked by wackyguy 3 in Other - Entertainment

2006-08-15 17:49:47 · 5 answers · asked by ..... 1 in Other - Entertainment

I want to get my original music published. Who do I send my CD to? I would be willing to sign a record deal, or possibly sell my songs to other musicians.

2006-08-15 17:49:36 · 2 answers · asked by Brianman3 3 in Music

There was a guy named John, who was the most positive guy in the whole world. Every time anyone said something negative, John would always say, "It could have been worse."

One day, John's co-workers all got together and decided to come up with a scenario so bad that John couldn't say that it could have been worse.

When John arrived at work that day, one of his co-workers asked him, "John did you hear what happened to Sam last night?"

John replied, "No, what?"

The co-worker replied, "When Sam got home last night, he found his wife in bed with another man. Sam shot the man, his wife, and then turned the gun on himself!"

John replied, "Well, it could have been worse."

In disgust the co-worker replied, "Now how could that have been any worse?"

John replied, "Because if it had been the night before, he would have shot me!"

2006-08-15 17:49:25 · 7 answers · asked by Woody 3 in Jokes & Riddles