Entertainment & Music - 1 May 2007

cheese

2007-05-01 22:04:42 · 19 answers · asked by Tom Thumb 1 in Polls & Surveys

from hotel rooms?

(Inspired by Dr. Know It All)

2007-05-01 21:56:42 · 20 answers · asked by gone 7 in Polls & Surveys

HPS>> Before we start our initiation ritual, I have an announcement. Fluffy Moon Ferret has totally burned out her hard drive and probably won't be able to get back on line for at least two weeks

EAST>> Darn! She was going to teach us how to make cyber corn dollies next week :-(

HP>> Can I suggest that we table this and get down to business?

EAST>>Yes, sorry

HP>> We're about to start the initiation ritual. Is everyone ready?

WEST>> Present

EAST>> Ready

SOUTH>>Roger

INITIATE>> I am ready

>~~(1 minute pause)~~

HPS>> North?

>~~(1minute pause)~~

HP>>NORTH??

NORTH>>Sorry, I had to reboot

HPS>> Ok, we are all here. Initiate, are you skyclad and ready?

INITIATE>> Not yet-- hold on, I need to get a pillow

HP>>Pillow?

INITIATE>>Yes, I have a metal chair here at my desk. OK-- BRB

>~~(2 minute pause)~~

INITIATE>> Ok, I am ready and skyclad

HPS>>Good, now do you have the cord?

2007-05-01 21:55:58 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Tan? My sister gets so annoyed by people who tan because she says it looks totally ridiculous and fake, and everybody knows it because nobody's orange. No big deal to me, but sometimes people overdo it.

2007-05-01 21:53:27 · 14 answers · asked by bezsenný 5 in Polls & Surveys

it can music, conversation... any sound!

2007-05-01 21:52:25 · 19 answers · asked by gone 7 in Polls & Surveys

2007-05-01 21:50:24 · 7 answers · asked by St. Dave 5 in Movies

It didn't hurt anyone, I was actually complamenting Yahoo Answers. And this is my reward.

2007-05-01 21:49:54 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

A Pagan died and, much to her surprise, found herself at the Pearly Gates facing St. Peter. He walked up to her and said, "Hello, and welcome."

She stared at St. Peter in complete confusion. "Wait a minute," she said. "I was supposed to end up in the Summerlands."

He smiled. "Ah, you must be one of our Pagan sisters. Follow me, please."

Peter gestured for her to follow him down a small path which went through the gates and down a bit to the left. They walked for a short while, then he stepped back and gestured her forward. Looking past his hand, she saw the verdant fields and forests of her desired Summerlands. She saw people feasting, dancing, and making merry, exactly as she expected. While shaking her head in wonder, the Pagan happened to glance over to one side and saw a small group of people a short way away from the edge of the Summerlands. The people in the group were watching the revelers, but not joining them. Instead, they were screaming and weeping piteously.

2007-05-01 21:49:00 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

A pompous Southern minister was seated next to an Wiccan on a recent flight. After the plane took off, the flight attendant began to take drink orders. The Wiccan asked for wine, which was then placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the minister if he would also like a drink. The minister replies in disgust, "Ma'am, I'd rather be savagely raped by a brazen whore than let liquor touch these lips!"

The Wiccan politely handed his wine back to the attendant and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't know there was a choice.

2007-05-01 21:47:46 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

battlefield?

2007-05-01 21:47:39 · 24 answers · asked by gone 7 in Polls & Surveys

2007-05-01 21:46:38 · 17 answers · asked by Rajni 2 in Polls & Surveys

for granted!!

2007-05-01 21:45:39 · 19 answers · asked by gone 7 in Polls & Surveys

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds
sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many
will be left?" She calls on little TONY.

He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the
first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I
like your thinking."

Then little TONY says, "I have a question for YOU.

There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:

One is delicately licking the sides of the triple
scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the
cone.

The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.

Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I
suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked
the cone."

To which Little TONY replied, "The correct answer is
'the one with the wedding ring on," but I like your
thinking."

2007-05-01 21:45:16 · 75 answers · asked by vijay m Indian Lawyer 7 in Jokes & Riddles

As part of an Interfaith community project, A right wing Christian priest, a rabbi, and a Pagan priestess decided that in order to improve relations in the community, they will go on a fishing trip together on a local pond.


They're out in the boat, and the Pagan priestess excuses herself to go to the
bathroom back on the shore. She gets out, walks across the water back to shore, and then walks back across the water to the boat.

The Christian priest looks in amazement, crosses himself, and they
continue fishing. It comes on about noon time, and the rabbi realizes they
left their lunches back on shore. So he gets up, walks across the water to
the shore, retrieves the lunches, and walks back across the water to the boat.

The Christian priest, now completely amazed, and a little bit
righteous, thinks, "not to be outdone by two heathens, I can do that
too!!" So he gets up, excuses himself to go to the bathroom, takes a step out of the boat, and promptly sinks to

2007-05-01 21:44:55 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

They recently discovered a smaller scroll hidden in the cylinder of the first scroll of the ancient Biblical scriptures, believed to be the actual "first page" of the Bible. When deciphered, it read:

"Copyright (c) 300 B.C. God. All Rights Reserved First Scrawling: First-Sunrise-After-Stonehenge-Keystone- Is-Shadowed, 300 B.C.

All beings, places and events depicted in this work are fictional, and any resemblance to actual beings, places and events past, present or future is purely coincidental.

WARNING: Some of the actions performed in this work are dangerous and should only be attempted by professionals familiar with the action in question.

NOTE: Those tiny points of light in the sky when it gets dark are called 'stars'. Some of them do blow up on occasion. In no way should this be construed as a sign that there is, beneath such an explosion, any form of saviour. Should such a misconstrual happen, the author will not be held responsible for the avalanche of arrogance

2007-05-01 21:43:21 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Four Catholic ladies were having coffee. The first Catholic woman tells her friends "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father.'"

The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people call him 'Your Grace.'"

The third Catholic crone says "My son is a cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say 'Your Eminence.'"

Since the fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence, the first three women give her this subtle "Well...?"

Finally she replies, "My son is a gorgeous, sexy, antler wearing, body building Pagan. When he walks into a room, women say, 'Oh my God.'"

2007-05-01 21:42:29 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

I Like My Chemical Romance

2007-05-01 21:41:24 · 23 answers · asked by Me! 2 in Polls & Surveys

A letter from a 3rd grade teacher sent home to Pagan parents


Dear Mr. and Mrs. Thomas,

I write this letter in concern of your daughter, Aradia Moon. Please don't take this the wrong way, however, although she is a straight-A student and a very bright child, she has some strange habits that I feel we should address.

Every morning before class, she insists on walking around the classroom with her pencil held in the air. She says she is "drawing down the moon." I told her Art Class is in an hour and to please refrain from drawing until then.

And speaking of Art Class, whenever she draws a night sky, she insists on drawling little circles around all the stars and people dancing on the ground. And that brings up dancing, I had to stop her twice for taking off her clothes during a game of "Ring Around the Rosey"! By the way, what does the term "skyclad" mean?

Aradia has no problem with making friends. I always find her sitting outside during recess with her friends sitting

2007-05-01 21:39:43 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

too come on Yahoo and have a right to air there views on here ,it is silly they don't really no anyone but seem too think that they can comment on people .

2007-05-01 21:37:08 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-05-01 21:36:55 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

please name one dish only

2007-05-01 21:36:50 · 25 answers · asked by ღღrocknroshღღ 3 in Polls & Surveys

2007-05-01 21:36:27 · 31 answers · asked by Hope Summer 6 in Polls & Surveys

What qualities make for a truly great friend?

2007-05-01 21:36:12 · 7 answers · asked by Lauren J 6 in Polls & Surveys

They are my favorite ...

2007-05-01 21:33:57 · 21 answers · asked by Hope Summer 6 in Polls & Surveys

Is it being at one with yourself,or God? Is it having plenty of money? Is it having lots of friends or family? Is it some indefinable thing?

2007-05-01 21:33:56 · 13 answers · asked by Lauren J 6 in Polls & Surveys

They may be cute and cuddly when they're little, but they tend to grow. Fast. To something large.

You can't flush your overgrown summoned pet down the toilet and no pound will take one. (Trust me on this one. )

Unless you spay or neuter them, they will breed, quickly.

Good luck trying to find a vet that will spay or neuter one...

The feeding costs are astronomical. New Age shops are very expensive. Oh, sorry, I meant "astrological".

An exotic summoned pet is very difficult to feed. Museums start suspecting your interests in ancient cultures rather quickly.

Getting them used to gourmet food is a bad idea: there aren't that many virgins around, you see!

Cats sitting on the chest of a sleeping child sucking their life-force out may be a myth. With summoned pets, it isn't.

No insurance will cover it if your summoned pet bites your guests.

They may even eat your guests while you pop into the kitchen for tea.

2007-05-01 21:33:45 · 1 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

A project manager, a software engineer, and a hardware engineer are helping out on a project.

About midweek they decide to walk up and down the beach during their lunch hour. Halfway up the beach, they stumbled upon a lamp. As they rub the lamp a genie appears and says "Normally I would grant you three wishes, but since there are three of you, I will grant you each one wish."

The hardware engineer went first. "I would like to spend the rest of my life living in a huge house in St. Thomas with no money worries." The genie granted him his wish and sent him on off to St. Thomas.

The software engineer went next. "I would like to spend the rest of my life living on a huge yacht cruising the Mediterranean with no money worries." The genie granted him his wish and sent him off to the Mediterranean.

Last, but not least, it was the project manager's turn. "And what would your wish be?" asked the genie.

"I want them both back after lunch" replied the project manager.

2007-05-01 21:31:06 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Having been to several South American countries & I have seen poverty at it's worst with unstable governments and served in the USAF during the Viet Nam era and I have seen war in a foriegn land.
But what would you think if you woke up to the sounds of war in your neighborhood day after day?

2007-05-01 21:30:31 · 7 answers · asked by ☮ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ☮ 6 in Polls & Surveys

2007-05-01 21:28:57 · 34 answers · asked by *Catherine* 2 in Polls & Surveys

Employee Of The Month, did you like it

2007-05-01 21:28:50 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys