take off clothing and place it in a sectioned laundry hamper according to whites and coloreds
walk to the bathroom wearing long dressing gown. if you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, you cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom
look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out you gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you’re getting fat
get in the show. look for facecloth, arm cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone
wash your hair once with cucumber shampoo with 83 added vitamins
wash your hair once with cucumber shampoo with 83 added vitamins
condition your hair with cucumber conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. leave on hair for 15 minutes
wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red raw
wash entire rest of body with gingernut body wash
rinse conditioner from hair. (this takes at least 15 minutes as you must make sure that it has all come off)
shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead
scream loudly when your boyfriend/husband flushes the toilet and you lose the water pressure
turn off shower
squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mould spots
get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African country. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel
check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit
attack with nails if found
return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head
if you see your boyfriend/husband along the way,cover up any exposed flesh and then rush to bedroom to spend at least an hour and a half getting dressed
2006-08-27
06:17:13
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15 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Jokes & Riddles