Entertainment & Music - 27 April 2007

An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the
question, "Have you ever been arrested?" he wrote, "No."

The next question, intended for people who had answered in the
affirmative to the previous question, was "Why?"

The applicant answered it anyway: "Never got caught." =))

2007-04-27 10:29:03 · 9 answers · asked by Masoud   2 in Jokes & Riddles

THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T SAY

My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat

When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.

Sorry!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.

But don't fret about it...
She moved in with me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,

I can't help but wonder...
"What the hell was I thinking?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.

After having met you...
I've changed my mind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...

Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Happy Birthday,
Uncle Dad!

(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Happy birthday!
You look great for your age.

Almost Lifelike!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.

Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We have been friends for a very long time...
let's say we stop?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.

So we're having you put to sleep.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.

Look at the bright side,
it's really good pay

2007-04-27 10:28:15 · 15 answers · asked by bernman101 6 in Jokes & Riddles

Answer as you will, please keep it clean though!!!
Thanks!!!

2007-04-27 10:28:08 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Entertainment

i am looking for dvd movie called night of the werewolf. no i am not looking for create you own night of the werewolf. i am looking for movie called night of the werewolf based on elizabeth bathory legend. where can i buy this movie at?

2007-04-27 10:27:58 · 4 answers · asked by cmculwell 1 in Movies

LOL! i see so many ''what color are your eyes'' questions so.. i did this one :/

2007-04-27 10:27:06 · 30 answers · asked by GleN 6 in Polls & Surveys

A man walked into a bar, sat down, and ordered a beer. As he sipped the beer,
he heard a soothing voice say, "Nice tie."

Looking around, he noticed that the bar was empty, except for himself and the
bartender at the end of the bar.

A few sips later, the voice said, "Beautiful shirt."

At this, the man called the bartender over. "Hey, I must be losing my mind,"
he told the bartender. "I keep hearing these voices saying nice things, and
there's not a soul in here but us."

"It's the peanuts," answered the bartender.

"Say what?" replied the man in disbelief.

"You heard me," said the barkeep. "It's the peanuts... they're complimentary."

2007-04-27 10:26:55 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

those people that say 'plenty more fish in the sea'...........

OMG like thats what you want to hear!

2007-04-27 10:26:49 · 34 answers · asked by Sharky Vl 5 in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-27 10:24:31 · 12 answers · asked by GleN 6 in Polls & Surveys

I know it's supposed to be can never hurt me. But what do you think the rest of it SHOULD be.

Don't words hurt you more. Sticks and stones aren't can't drive someone to suicide, or cutting, of drug/alcohol abuse...

But they can put you in a cast.

2007-04-27 10:20:51 · 24 answers · asked by Koko Butta Kream 4 in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-27 10:20:11 · 11 answers · asked by ♥SummerRain♥ 6 in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-27 10:19:48 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

or suspended.
♥•Łατiиα•♥ #2

2007-04-27 10:18:11 · 1 answers · asked by ❀Latina♔ 3 in Polls & Surveys

everyone say something on this q so nothing gross

2007-04-27 10:18:05 · 37 answers · asked by Hells Bells 2 in Polls & Surveys

I preferred Sinead O'Connor's shaven-headed look

Nothing compares to her!

2007-04-27 10:17:51 · 19 answers · asked by Sean JTR 7 in Celebrities

Who's gonna call me this evening???

2007-04-27 10:16:25 · 9 answers · asked by annie 6 in Polls & Surveys

Whenever I play in front of people, I freeze up and can't play as good as I do at home by myself. Tomorrow is my first time playing in a competition. How can I stay calm and just play as well as I can?

2007-04-27 10:15:59 · 6 answers · asked by melissa 1 in Music

Its sung by a girl..at first it sounded like Taylor Swift

one part of the lyrics are "tears on my guitar"...hope that bit helps

2007-04-27 10:15:36 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

hey anyone a fan of The Cure?
whats your favorite song by them?
favorite album?
when did you first here them?
what was your first impresion of them?

2007-04-27 10:15:09 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

My 14 year old daughter wants a bass. Is one better than the other for beginners, as far as ease in learning? We've looked on Musiciansfriend.com and I'm pretty sure we'll go with a Squier by Fender. Just have to figure out P or J now. I'm really not sure at all what the difference is.

2007-04-27 10:14:55 · 2 answers · asked by D B 1 in Music

...of a question you just answered, and ended up in some weird topic??

And,

never got out? Is that how you found P&S?

2007-04-27 10:12:20 · 1 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Mine would be "Pokey: So very angry"

2007-04-27 10:11:39 · 49 answers · asked by ? 5 in Polls & Surveys

A blonde goes to the post office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards...
She says to the clerk, "May I have 50 Christmas stamps?"
The clerk says, "What denomination?"
The blonde says, "God help us! Has it come to this? Give me 6 Catholic,
12 Presbyterian, 10 Lutheran and 22 Baptists."

2007-04-27 10:10:54 · 17 answers · asked by bernman101 6 in Jokes & Riddles

Once in fourth grade, one of my classmates fell asleep while coloring. He fell asleep with his head on a table, his nose by an open permanent marker. Once he woke up, he was all like, WHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was so funny! He accidentally got high!


Much love, the former Cheese Harrison and current Cheese Starr who lives on Abbey Road

2007-04-27 10:10:50 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-27 10:10:40 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

A man was constipated, so he decided to go to the doctor. The doctor examined him and explained, "I'm going to give you some suppositories. I'll insert one now, and then I'll give you another one for later this evening."

Later that evening, the man asks has his wife to insert the suppository. She agrees reluctantly, then puts one hand on his shoulder and inserts the suppository. Suddenly, her husband shrieks, "Aahhhhh!"

"What's wrong? Did I hurt you?" she asks.

"No... I just realised that the doctor had *both* his hands on my shoulders!"


Star if you like it

2007-04-27 10:10:09 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

just bored and drinking nasty old coke and wishing i had a pepsi so what one do you like more coke or pepsi?

2007-04-27 10:09:00 · 63 answers · asked by missykrissy 1 in Polls & Surveys

Mine: Spending WAY too much money on our vacation! Oh well, it was WELL worth it! =)

2007-04-27 10:07:38 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-27 10:07:21 · 7 answers · asked by Jumana U 1 in Comics & Animation

Should we stick in a sign that says NEST and then look for rats? I mean come on...somethings gotta give!

2007-04-27 10:05:43 · 11 answers · asked by Ronatnyu 7 in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-27 10:05:38 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music