Entertainment & Music - 6 April 2007

2007-04-06 01:06:30 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Sometimes I have to remind myself... it's pillage first then burn..

2007-04-06 01:05:28 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

im gonna go have brunch and and easter egg hunt and get dressed up? what are you gonna wear on easter ?

2007-04-06 01:05:18 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Don't You?

2007-04-06 01:05:16 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-06 01:04:18 · 15 answers · asked by multipły 6 in Polls & Surveys

When the divorce was final, she spent the first day packing her belongings
into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining
room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music and feasted on
a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few
half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain
rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the
first few days.

Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning,
mopping and airing the place out.

Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned.

Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set
off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in
the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to
work in the house.

The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not
find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the
local Realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a
new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told her the
saga of the rotting house.

She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly, and
would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting
the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price
that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were
to sign the papers that very day.

She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the former husband and his girlfriend stood smiling as they
watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home...



...including the curtain rods.

2007-04-06 01:03:45 · 7 answers · asked by Atheism itself is your best shot at heaven !! 7 in Jokes & Riddles

A city cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little

girl on her new shiny bike stopped beside him. "Nice bike," the cop

said, "did Santa bring it to you?"



"Yep, the little girl said, "he sure did!"



The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $5.00 ticket for

a safety violation. The cop said, "Next year tell Santa to put a reflector

light on the back of it."



The young girl looked up at the cop and said, "Nice horse you got

there sir, did Santa bring it to you?"



"Yes, he sure did, " chuckled the cop.



The little girl looked up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa the

dick goes underneath the horse, not on top."

2007-04-06 01:03:01 · 5 answers · asked by Atheism itself is your best shot at heaven !! 7 in Jokes & Riddles

I just got to work! How is everyone today? Didja miss me? =D

2007-04-06 01:02:09 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Cream and Sugar or Straight

2007-04-06 01:01:43 · 23 answers · asked by Leo 2 in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-06 01:00:52 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

A blonde's car gets a flat tire on the Interstate one day. So she eases it over onto the shoulder of the road. She carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk. Takes out two cardboard men, unfolds them and stands them at the rear of the vehicle facing oncoming traffic. The lifelike cardboard men are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies to approaching drivers...

Not surprisingly, the traffic became snarled and backed up. It wasn't very long before a police car arrives. The Officer, clearly enraged, approaches the blonde of the disabled vehicle yelling, "What is going on here?"

My car broke down, Officer" says the woman, calmly.

"Well, what the hell are these obscene cardboard pictures doing here by the road?!" asks the Officer...

"Oh, those are my emergency flashers!" she replied.

2007-04-06 00:58:05 · 7 answers · asked by ucglass 4 in Jokes & Riddles

A young boy went up to his father and asked him,
"Dad, what is the
difference between 'potentially' and
'realistically'?" The father
thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your
mother if she would
sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask
your sister if
she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million
dollars, and then, ask
your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a
million dollars. Come
back and tell me what you learn from that."

So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you
sleep with Brad
Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied,
"Of course, I would!
We could really use that money to fix up the house
and to send you
kids to a great university!"

The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would
you sleep with Brad
Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh
good heavens! I
LOVE
Brad Pitt and I would sleep with him in a
heartbeat. Are you
nuts?"

The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would
you sleep with
Brad
Pitt for a million dollars?" "Of course," the
brother replied. "Do
you
know how much a million bucks would buy?"

The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then
went back to his
dad.

His father asked him, "Did you find out the
difference between
'potentially' and 'realistically'?"

The boy replied: "Yes.

'Potentially,' you and I are sitting on three million
dollars, but
'realistically,' we're living with two hookers and a
future
congressman.''

2007-04-06 00:57:11 · 9 answers · asked by ucglass 4 in Jokes & Riddles

A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walks into Wal-Mart with
her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through

the entrance. She's dressed in dirty jeans, a greasy T-shirt with
holes
In it and wearing flip-flops exposing her cracked and filthy toenails.


When she yells at the kids, she exposes her yellowed, crooked teeth
with more than a few missing.


The Wal-Mart Greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice

children you've got there. Are they twins?"

The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no they
ain't!

The oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why the Hell
would
you think they're twins? Do you really think they look alike?"

No," replies the greeter, "I just couldn't believe someone had sex
with
you twice

2007-04-06 00:56:07 · 9 answers · asked by ucglass 4 in Jokes & Riddles

and do you think some people do it just for fun?

2007-04-06 00:54:51 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Linda says to Frank, "You know, we could make a lot of money running our own Bungee-jumping business in Mexico."

Frank thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money and buy everything they need: a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc.

They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square.

As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work.

When they had finished, there was such a crowd, they thought it would be a good idea to give a demonstration.

So, Linda jumps. She bounces at the end of the cord, but when she comes back up, Frank notices that she has a few cuts and scratches.

Unfortunately Frank isn't able to catch her and she falls again, bounces, and comes back up again. This time, she is bruised and bleeding.

Again, Frank misses her.




Linda falls again and bounces back up. This time, she comes back pretty messed up -- she's got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious.

Luckily, Frank finally catches her this time and says, "What happened? Was the cord too long?"

Barely able to speak, Linda gasps, "No, the Bungee cord was fine... It was the crowd. What the hell is a piñata?!"

2007-04-06 00:54:50 · 5 answers · asked by ucglass 4 in Jokes & Riddles

Who knows the FULL version for the song

Strut by The Cheetah Girls

I can take words OR web sites.

2007-04-06 00:53:20 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

A 90-year old man said to his doctor, "I've never felt better...
I have an 18-year old bride who is pregnant with my child.
What do you think of that?"

The doctor replied, "I have an elderly friend who is a hunter
And never misses a season. One day he was in a hurry and
Picked up his umbrella by mistake. When he got to the
Creek, he saw a beaver. He raised his umbrella and went
"bang, bang, bang", and the beaver fell dead.
What do you think of that?"

The 90-year old said, "I'd say somebody else shot the beaver."

The doctor said, "My point exactly."

2007-04-06 00:53:09 · 5 answers · asked by ucglass 4 in Jokes & Riddles

How bout since you are grown up?

2007-04-06 00:48:44 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

I've heard from my friend that Britney Spears killed herself.I'm not a hudge fan but when i was little i used to listen to her music

2007-04-06 00:48:32 · 23 answers · asked by Marina_the_oceancutty 1 in Television

Normally our guitarist writes the lyrics, but I have this song called 'Ego Pin' that is about the singer of our previous band, and his...ahem...slightly massive ego. An Ego Pin incidentally is a slightly joking way of deflating his ego...

2007-04-06 00:47:42 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

some one again asked a gross thing!!!
its not me!
please pass this on to people that you know.
just say its not me saying this.
Just dont answer the gross question because its not me!!!!!!!1

2007-04-06 00:47:36 · 17 answers · asked by Emily 1 in Polls & Surveys

THESE LYRICS ARE IN A SONG...DO YOU KNOW WHO IS THE ARTIST??

2007-04-06 00:45:49 · 7 answers · asked by Toby G* 4 in Music

fergie-glamarous
pink-ur not dead the album

2007-04-06 00:45:14 · 23 answers · asked by yellowladyflower 2 in Music

2007-04-06 00:43:18 · 36 answers · asked by Smurf 7 in Polls & Surveys

can you teach me...or at least hit me in the head the next time I answer my brothers phone call for babysitting?

2007-04-06 00:42:25 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

ur life if anything at all.............lol

2007-04-06 00:41:44 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

if your ugly whos fault is it ?! is it ur parents fault?
does that mean people who were born goodlooking are lucky however people who werent born with pretty faces arent lucky and they have to accept the fact that they'r inperfect n incompelet. and also they have to live whole their lives with the fact that they'r less than everybody else?! and people look at them with pitty!

2007-04-06 00:40:43 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-04-06 00:39:45 · 21 answers · asked by hello world 7 in Polls & Surveys

I really wanted to watch 300 yesterday and then my mom didnt wanna watch it and my brother, who is 17 wanted to watch TMNT and i am 15. but then he decided he wanted to watch 300, too. So when we go to buy the ticket, there is a real bitchy prep from my school who sells the tickets. my mom tries to say that im 17 while my brother is 18 and we had to show ID. and it didnt work obviously.so she says I have to be 17 or i have to have an adult with me. My mom bought my brother a ticket for 300 and i had to watch blades of glory. Im telling you, i would rather watch more violence than more sexual references. My question is- What are the rules of rated R movies in the theater? How come I can't watch a rated R movie with my 17 year old brother and why cant my mom buy me a ticket just so I can?

2007-04-06 00:39:30 · 6 answers · asked by mel 3 in Movies

I found the song.... www.casrecords,com/annanicole
It's really good!!! I still would like to know something about the song writers Paul j. Biondi a saxophonist and Lisa Webb and singer song writer from Nashville. Thank You, Pamala

2007-04-06 00:38:13 · 2 answers · asked by pamala_b 1 in Music