Entertainment & Music - 9 August 2006

You may not know that many nonliving things have a gender; for example....

1) Ziploc Bags--They are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

2) Copiers--They are Female, because once turned off, it takes awhile to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right
buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

3) Tire--Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.

4) Hot Air Balloon--Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.

5) Sponges--Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

6) Web Page--Female, because it's always getting hit on.

7) Subway--Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

8) Hourglass-- Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

9) Hammer--Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

10) Remote Control--Female...Ha! You thought it'd be male. But consider this--it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!!!

2006-08-09 18:43:40 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

It's work for me now

2006-08-09 18:41:08 · 16 answers · asked by VOOL 5 in Polls & Surveys

What did you think of it overall?

2006-08-09 18:41:07 · 6 answers · asked by hagren 3 in Television

10. The monitor is up on blocks.

9. Outgoing faxes have tobacco stains on them.

8. The six front keys have rotted out.

7. The extra RAM slots have truck parts installed in them.

6. The numeric keypad only goes up to six.

5. The password is "Huntin".

4. The CPU has a gun rack mount.

3. There is a Skoal can in the CD-ROM drive.

2. The keyboard is camouflaged.

1. The mouse is referred to as a "critter".

2006-08-09 18:40:50 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

i am gonna buy one of the dvd packs for them but which one

2006-08-09 18:40:05 · 20 answers · asked by RO_dog 3 in Television

2006-08-09 18:40:00 · 13 answers · asked by Malcolm uses Xbox 360 Avatar 7 in Movies

Watch this clip of a terrifying shift of whistle register
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6AXfips0BQE

2006-08-09 18:39:25 · 9 answers · asked by Vocal Prowess 4 in Music

From the moment I heard Frau
Said I had a clone
I knew that I'd be safe
Cuz I'd never be alone........

2006-08-09 18:39:13 · 9 answers · asked by Reptar 4 in Music

Do girls like artsy muscians or manly tough guys?

2006-08-09 18:38:07 · 27 answers · asked by Christian W 1 in Polls & Surveys

2006-08-09 18:37:25 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Well... do you? give me a website to look at while im doing what im doing. ...10pts to the most helpful person

2006-08-09 18:37:16 · 6 answers · asked by I tell it like it is 1 in Polls & Surveys

hold me now, im 6 feet from the edge and im thinkin, maybe 6 feet is so far down...
something like that

2006-08-09 18:37:15 · 6 answers · asked by Steph 1 in Music

I sat, as did millions of other Americans, and watched as our government underwent a peaceful transition of power in January 2001.

At first, I felt a swell of pride and patriotism as I watched George W. Bush take his oath of office. However, all that pride vanished as I watched William Jefferson Clinton board Air Force One for the final time.

I saw 21 U.S. Marines in full dress, with rifles, fire a 21-gun salute to the outgoing President.

It was then that I realized how far America's military had deteriorated. Every last one of them missed.

2006-08-09 18:36:41 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Just want answer because I'm curious.

2006-08-09 18:36:26 · 4 answers · asked by jezse018@sbcglobal.net 1 in Movies

2006-08-09 18:36:01 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

A good looking biker stops by the Harley shop to have his bike fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home.

On the way home, he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. Next, he stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, he now had a problem, how to carry all of his purchases home.

The owner said, "Put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand."
"Hey, thanks!" the biker said, and out the door he went.

But in the parking lot, he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, "Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?"

The biker said, "Well, as a matter of fact, I live at 1616 Mockingbird Lane. Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time."

The little old lady looked him over cautiously, then said, "I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me against the wall, pull up my skirt, and ravish me?"

The biker said, "Holy smokes, Lady! I'm carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?"

The lady said, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens."

2006-08-09 18:35:21 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

a damn about what I have to say?

2006-08-09 18:35:12 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

what was the name of the star of the show, his partner, and name of the show? 80's or 90's maybe?

2006-08-09 18:34:16 · 12 answers · asked by macybluedawn 5 in Television

go to a library, in the bathroom, telll the librarian ur taking a magzine and a book with u. then get in there and spread peanutbutter on it. come out, show the librarian. then lick the books. and while ur in the bathroom, say "I can't deal with this crap!" then start screaming for 30 sec. then drop somethin heavy in the toilet. then get out of the stall and wait for someone else to get out of a stall, and when they're out, yell at them "YOU POOPER!!!!!!!!!!" You POOP!!!!!!!

2006-08-09 18:34:06 · 3 answers · asked by 1+1+1 DOES NOT EQUAL 1 1 in Jokes & Riddles

CNN said that after the war, there is a plan to divide Iraq into three parts: regular, premium and unleaded. (Jay Leno)

It has just been reported that specially trained circus midgets have flown several shorties against Iraq today. (Johann von Haupkopf)

Gasoline prices have gotten so high that women who want to run over their cheating husbands have started car pooling. (Fairy3Quarters)

My wife wanted to go somewhere expensive for the weekend. So, I took her down the street to the local Texaco. (Jay Leno)

AT&T announced last week it will lay off up to 8,000 employees. Ever conscious of its image, the company is promoting the layoffs as a new feature called job forwarding. (Unknown Source)

2006-08-09 18:33:53 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

chocolate or vanilla? M&&MS or skittles?? white or black? Pink or BLue? Hollister or abercrombie? BSBG or BEBE? Typed or WRitten? Instant Message or E-mail? Frozen Yogurt or Ice Cream? burger or hot dog??

2006-08-09 18:33:42 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Entertainment

I mean In the manga Ban is a major pervert and is always grabbing Hevn's breasts and in the anime Ginji is always trying to get a girlfriend, and everything points to them being straight, so why is there so many yaoi fanfics?

2006-08-09 18:33:13 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Comics & Animation

Because, I sure haven't!!!

I couldn't resist asking this question!!

I'm a little smart ***, who probably belongs in hell!

2006-08-09 18:33:08 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

i think mine would be yellow glitter

2006-08-09 18:32:19 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

My brother says that slim jims, the devices that police officers and thieves commonly use to break into cars, are named this because robbers once used Slim Jims beef jerkey as a way to unlock vehicles.

I think this is ridiculous.

Can you settle this disagreement?

2006-08-09 18:32:15 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.



2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.



4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.



5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.



6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.



7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.



8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavoured mouthwash.



9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.



10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.



11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.



12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.



13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.



14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.



15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that when you die, your Soul flies

Up onto the roof and gets stuck there.



16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

2006-08-09 18:31:28 · 10 answers · asked by Sangy . 4 in Jokes & Riddles

I try to click on the thumbs up or thumbs down and nothing happens, and it looks different too, what's up?

2006-08-09 18:30:04 · 7 answers · asked by blonde mom70 3 in Polls & Surveys

...so I can skip work tomorrow and stay here answering more questions?

2006-08-09 18:29:04 · 21 answers · asked by Ms. Pelled Babby Schmidt 7 in Polls & Surveys

Jonny is in I standard and thinks he should be in III Std., because he is intelligent. The class teacher, Ms. Brooks, tests his IQ.

Ms. Brooks: What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Jonny: Legs, Madam.

Ms. B: What is in your pants that you have, but, I do not have?
Jonny: Pockets.

Ms. B: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains whitish liquid?
Jonny: Coconut

Ms. B: What goes in hard and pink, then comes out soft and sticky?
Jonny: Bubblegum

2006-08-09 18:27:43 · 3 answers · asked by Electric 7 in Jokes & Riddles

2006-08-09 18:26:59 · 31 answers · asked by veronica b 1 in Music