Ever read a dating ad and wonder what people are really trying to say about themselves?
Here goes:
40-ish = 49
Adventurer = Has had more partners than you ever will
Athletic = Flat-chested
Average looking = Ugly
Beautiful = Pathological liar
Educated = College dropout
Emotionally secure = Medicated
Free spirit = Substance user
Friendship First = Trying to live down a reputation as a s|ut
Fun = Annoying & Talks A Lot
Gentle = Comatose
Good listener = Borderline autistic
Old-fashioned = Lights out, missionary position only
Open-minded = Desperate
Outgoing = Loud
Passionate = Loud
Romantic = Looks better by candlelight
Voluptuous = Grossly Fat
Weight proportional to height = Holy crap! Watch Out!!
Wants soulmate = One step away from stalking
Widow = Nagged first husband to death
Young at heart = Toothless crone
Feel free to add some more if you like.
2006-12-17
10:03:41
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