A drunk had been at a pub all night. At last call, the drunk stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. He tried to stand one more time, to the same result.

He figured he'd crawl outside to get some fresh air, since maybe that would sober him up. Once outside, he stood up and fell flat on his face. So he decided to crawl the four blocks to his house.

When he arrived at the door he stood up and again fell flat on his face.

He crawled through the door and into his bedroom. When he reached his bed he tried one more time to stand up.

This time he managed to pull himself upright, but he quickly fell right into bed and was sound asleep the second his head hit the pillow.

He was awakened the next morning by his wife shouting, "So you've been out drinking again, have you?!"

"No! What makes you say that?" he asked, putting on his best innocent expression.

"The pub called... you forgot your wheelchair again."

2007-11-13 07:28:32 · 14 answers · asked by I ♥ Christmas. 3 in Jokes & Riddles

12 ⤊

Are you always Honest or do you lie to get your way?

2007-11-13 07:28:31 · 9 answers · asked by Page 4 in Polls & Surveys

1 ⤊

Better in the morning or at night?

hmm?

2007-11-13 07:28:28 · 33 answers · asked by Serene 5 in Polls & Surveys

25 ⤊

Should we bring back corporal punishment?

2007-11-13 07:26:53 · 28 answers · asked by kangaroo 4 in Polls & Surveys

39 ⤊

is it mandatory to go to Wal-Mart bra less?

2007-11-13 07:25:48 · 41 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

12 ⤊

if some one else walked a mile in YOUR shoes....??????

would your life be better or worse right now???

2007-11-13 07:25:37 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2 ⤊

What pops into your head when I say.......?

Harry Potter?

2007-11-13 07:24:36 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

1 ⤊

name this song & who recorded it?

They say I haven't noticed, that you wanna be alone
And sometimes no one's there when I answer the phone

2007-11-13 07:24:12 · 4 answers · asked by David 6 in Other - Music

12 ⤊

If I had a money tree in my backyard...Would you climb my fence to pick $100 bills from it?

2007-11-13 07:23:45 · 13 answers · asked by imahlah 6 in Polls & Surveys

5 ⤊

Would you rather be a Movie Star, Sports Star or Rock Star?

I'd pick Rock Star...when you get old and fat you can live on the royalties from your songs. Look at Gene Simmons.

2007-11-13 07:23:44 · 11 answers · asked by ? 6 in Polls & Surveys

6 ⤊

Guys only: Poll?

What's more attractive: A girls' smile or the way they smell?

2007-11-13 07:23:37 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2 ⤊

finish&&name this song?

meet me at the altar in your white dress we ain't gettin' no younger we might as well do it
been feeling all the while girl I must confess
___________________

title:
artist:

2007-11-13 07:23:26 · 9 answers · asked by count olaf 4 in Polls & Surveys

8 ⤊