Entertainment & Music - 20 February 2007

2007-02-20 14:38:04 · 58 answers · asked by Shelb-N-Ator [[H!ATD]] 3 in Polls & Surveys

How to Shower Like a Woman:

1. Take off fourteen layers of clothing you put on this morning. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing robe and towel on head. If you happen to see husband along the way, ignore juvenile "turban-head" jokes and run to bathroom. 3. Look at womanly physique in mirror and stick out stomach so as to complain about how fat you're getting. 4. Turn on hot water only. 5. Get in the shower, once you've found it through all the steam. 6. Look for facecloth, armcloth, legcloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone. 7. Wash hair once with cucumber and lemon shampoo with 83 added vitamins. 8. Rinse hair. Condition your hair with cucumber and lemon conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes. 9. Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red and raw. 10. Try to wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Java Cake bodywash. 11. Complain bitterly when you realize that your husband has once again been EATING your ginger nut and java cake body wash. 12. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least fifteen minutes, as you must make sure that all the conditioner has come off). 13. Debate shaving armpits and legs and decide that you can't be bothered. 14. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you get a rush of cold water. 15. Turn hot water on full and rinse off. 16. Dry with a towel the size of a small African country.

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How to Shower Like a Man:

1. Sit on the edge of the bed and take off the underwear you've walking around the house in all morning. Leave them on the floor. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing a towel. If you see your wife along the way, flash her. 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Pat your beer belly with affection as if it was a great achievement. Suck in your gut to see if you have pecs. (No.) 4. Turn on the water. 5. Check for pecs again. (Still no.) 6. Get in the shower. 7. Don't bother to look for a washcloth. (You don't use one.) 8. Spend 5 minutes soaping your body and rinse. 9. Spend 15 minutes washing your crotch and surrounding area. 10. Wash your rear end. 11. Shampoo your hair, do not use conditioner. 12. Make a shampoo mohawk. 13. Open the door and look at yourself in the mirror, giggle. 14. Pee. 15. Repeat #9, because it felt good. 16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. 17. Pick up the towel and sniff it. If it smells okay, go ahead and dry off with it. If it doesn't smell okay, holler to your wife to find you a clean one. 18. Return to the bedroom wearing the towel, if you pass your wife, flash her.

2007-02-20 14:38:04 · 3 answers · asked by mysweetest666 1 in Jokes & Riddles

and you’re dragging a guy behind your horse, would you be really mad if you looked back and saw the guy was reading a magazine?

2007-02-20 14:37:54 · 17 answers · asked by Tek ~aka~Legs! 7 in Polls & Surveys

....and i got to thinking. do any of you out there play the guitar with a violin bow? I know Page did it in a few songs and it seems interesting. any thoughts about it?

2007-02-20 14:37:50 · 10 answers · asked by amc3480 2 in Music

2007-02-20 14:37:21 · 8 answers · asked by Lee Edward 1 in Polls & Surveys

to get naked...? shower time....?

2007-02-20 14:37:09 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?

Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?

If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?

When a man talks dirty to a woman, its sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute.

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?

Since light travels faster than sound, is that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?

How come abbreviated is such a long word?

If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?

Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?

Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?

Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?

Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!!

Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?

Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not a door?

Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.

How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

If "con" is the opposite of "pro," then what is the opposite of progress?

Why is it lemon juice contains mostly artificial ingredients, but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?

Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

Do married people live longer than single people, or does it just SEEM longer?

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?

Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?

War doesn't determine who's right, just who's left.

2007-02-20 14:36:41 · 12 answers · asked by mysweetest666 1 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-02-20 14:36:13 · 3 answers · asked by jennifer_jj89 1 in Music

First: Smiling Zuko scares me. Alot.

Second: DEATH TO ZUKO AND AZULA!

Last: Iroh owns your soul,Toph should be the Avatar, Zutara is DEAD!

2007-02-20 14:36:12 · 3 answers · asked by Fhi-chan 2 in Television

4 a project

2007-02-20 14:35:49 · 38 answers · asked by deadlypotent 2 in Polls & Surveys

??????????????

2007-02-20 14:35:48 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

I'm so glad I made a few peolple smile anyway.
Thank you cocomadem, Panda, nicky, & Mayroxy & her MUM! (Hi Mum) G.night to Sue F

2007-02-20 14:35:39 · 5 answers · asked by funnygirl 4 in Jokes & Riddles

it was on csi ny a couple of weeks ago!! it goes like this " ah ah ah ah, honestly what will become of me? don't like reality. we are what we don't see. flames to dust. flames to dust. lovers to friends." thanks!!

2007-02-20 14:35:36 · 1 answers · asked by BrOwN eYe GiRl 3 in Music

2007-02-20 14:35:11 · 32 answers · asked by Lone Ranger 2 in Polls & Surveys

2/16/1973. What would someone consider a good match for me?

2007-02-20 14:34:59 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Horoscopes

2007-02-20 14:34:29 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-02-20 14:34:28 · 14 answers · asked by caerae4rent 1 in Celebrities

When i say all time, i mean all time. All ages of people can answer this question and give a little information about the movie so if others dont know it. Im really excited to see some of the answers.

2007-02-20 14:34:24 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-02-20 14:34:14 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Celebrities

2007-02-20 14:33:28 · 4 answers · asked by Wheaties 2 in Celebrities

I couldn't dance for my life, to tell you the truth, but how about you??

2007-02-20 14:33:22 · 18 answers · asked by ξℓ Çђαηφσ 7 in Polls & Surveys

Some of the lyrics go like this: What kind of World do you want baby? Thats all i know please HELP ME ITS DRIVING ME NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-02-20 14:33:17 · 6 answers · asked by Nicole 1 in Music

I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that day....

2007-02-20 14:33:00 · 27 answers · asked by Kiss My Shaz 7 in Polls & Surveys

Anyone Have Any Websites, Pics Of The Tattoos (Not The Shaved Head), Any Extra Info on This Whole Subject?

2007-02-20 14:32:47 · 11 answers · asked by caerae4rent 1 in Celebrities

2007-02-20 14:32:38 · 13 answers · asked by Space Ace 4 in Polls & Surveys

2007-02-20 14:32:33 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Other - Entertainment

2007-02-20 14:32:07 · 7 answers · asked by omygosh 4 in Music

2007-02-20 14:32:03 · 14 answers · asked by honeyluvsyou2004 2 in Music

How many of u think LOVE alias!!!and think that sydney n vaughn rock?

2007-02-20 14:31:52 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Celebrities

Because when they arrive they are wet and wild and when they leave they take your house

2007-02-20 14:31:45 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles