Entertainment & Music - 16 March 2007

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!”

The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”
The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you.”

2007-03-16 18:24:13 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

SEX

2007-03-16 18:24:10 · 2 answers · asked by xlalalalx 1 in Movies

2007-03-16 18:24:00 · 14 answers · asked by ~ B_e_K_z ~ 5 in Jokes & Riddles

Things people actually said in court, word for word:
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q: This myasthenia gravis-does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.

Q: How old is your son-the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A: He said, "where am I Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499.
Q: And where is milepost 499?
A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.

Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well I can see pretty well I think.

Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Before the accident.
A: Sure, I played horn for ten years. I even went to school for it.

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.

Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A: Yes sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disco am I at?

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?

Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?

Q: Did he kill you?

Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?

Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true?

Q: How many times have you committed suicide?

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, do they go up also?

2007-03-16 18:23:03 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

Hint: It is not "Perfect Strangers"

2007-03-16 18:22:58 · 6 answers · asked by RozPot 3 in Television

My english teacher likes to tell jokes, and when he does every one laughs when we tells one. But I don't laugh at them. Here is one. There was 4 people on one plane. A lawyer, piolet, teacher, construction worker and a little boy. The plane was about to crash, but there was only 3 parashots. So, the piolet said since that this is my plane I will take one of the parashots. Then the teacher took one too. Then the lawyer said since that I am the smartest and I earn to live I will take one. Then there was one parashot left. The construction worker said to the little boy that he was old, so you should take it. The boy said no. The smartest lawyer took my packsack. So, there are two left. I get the joke, but I didn't laugh at it because everyone makes a mistake. Is this weird? Or am I just stuiped.

2007-03-16 18:22:38 · 14 answers · asked by ? 3 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-03-16 18:22:10 · 25 answers · asked by Hello 3 in Polls & Surveys

i know the guy is successful worldwide but how did he do with his last album?

2007-03-16 18:21:24 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Music

thank you

2007-03-16 18:21:16 · 8 answers · asked by rk <3 :D 3 in Movies

and perhaps all episodes from season 1 and 2? ive tried basically everything!

2007-03-16 18:20:54 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Television

I was listening to my friends iPod shuffle and a NoFX song came on and we couldnt remember the title or CD. It has something to do with a brainwash?

2007-03-16 18:20:50 · 1 answers · asked by LessNes 3 in Music

2007-03-16 18:20:46 · 19 answers · asked by ? 5 in Polls & Surveys

http://www.eff.org/Privacy/search/searchtips.php

2007-03-16 18:20:00 · 19 answers · asked by ♫That'll be the Day♫ 6 in Polls & Surveys

if you saw a leprechaun??...lol.

2007-03-16 18:19:54 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a
picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one
raises his/her hand. The teacher says "See it's long neck? What
animal has a long neck?"

Sally holds up her hand and asks if it is a giraffe. "Very good
Sally," the teacher replies. Next she holds up a picture of a zebra.
None of the students holds up his/her hands. "See the stripes on
this animal? What animal has stripes?" Billy holds up his hand and
says it is a zebra. "Very good Billy," the teacher replies. Next
she holds up a picture of a deer. None of the students recognized
the animal.

"See the big antlers on this animal. What animal has horns like this?"

Still no one guesses. "Let me give you another hint, it's
something your mother calls your father."

Johnny shouts out "I know what it is, it's a h0rny b^stard."

2007-03-16 18:19:45 · 10 answers · asked by beautiful mind 2 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-03-16 18:19:40 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

2007-03-16 18:19:17 · 20 answers · asked by Destiny 5 in Polls & Surveys

Mine is Marge!

2007-03-16 18:18:39 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Polls & Surveys

Do you star your own questions?

2007-03-16 18:18:21 · 15 answers · asked by yumyum 6 in Polls & Surveys

In a level five happy dance !!!!

2007-03-16 18:18:00 · 21 answers · asked by kitti-kitti 5 in Polls & Surveys

I'm going bowling.... Wanna come?

2007-03-16 18:18:00 · 12 answers · asked by Who is that red head??? 6 in Polls & Surveys

Charlie was in a bar and three babes came up and started hitting on
him. He asked if they
wanted to come over to his house later. They agreed to come over at
after they went home
and got ready. Charlie had a friend who worked in a drugstore, so he
went to see him. He
asked his friend if he had anything that would keep him hard all night
long. The man
laughed and handed him a bottle of pills instructing him not to take
more than one. Once at
home, Charlie figured with three women he should take three pills, so
he gulped them
down. The next day Charlie showed up at the drugstore to see his
friend. Asking for some
liniment, he showed him his d^ck which was ripped to shreds. In
disbelief, his friend asked
if he was sure that he wanted to put liniment on his d^ck. Charlie
replied "No,I need it for
my arms the women never showed up!"

2007-03-16 18:17:42 · 3 answers · asked by beautiful mind 2 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-03-16 18:17:38 · 6 answers · asked by jlily680 4 in Polls & Surveys

2007-03-16 18:16:57 · 23 answers · asked by Destiny 5 in Polls & Surveys

How can you be stronger, if your brain dead?

2007-03-16 18:16:03 · 9 answers · asked by ηєvєrmorє 6 in Polls & Surveys

I've reached my answering limit....so I'm going to sign off for the night.......My birthday is this weekend and other than $$.....I'd really like lots of LOVE....in the form of fans!

Thank you.....and GOODnight and SWEETdreams!

2007-03-16 18:15:22 · 14 answers · asked by L ♥ L ♥ 7 in Polls & Surveys

My answers will be in parenthesis next to the questions.

Favorite...
Actress? (Monica Bellucci)
Actor? (Steven Strait)
Movie? (Cold Mountain)
Season? (Summer)
Model? (Petra Nemcova)
Color? (Red- I love black but it's not a color.)


That's it. Thanks!!

2007-03-16 18:14:50 · 9 answers · asked by JamaicanmecrayZ 1 in Polls & Surveys

2007-03-16 18:14:02 · 5 answers · asked by jlily680 4 in Polls & Surveys

do you like the pack n der songs?
slappin in the trunk
blue berrys
candy
dumb in my backpack
freaky boppa
go
hit da club
ice creams
im a boss
lite dat $h!t
oh go
pretty girl
push
ride my bike
watch it crack
weezy
wolfpack party
booty bounce boppa
club stuntin
fresh
vanz
dum didi dum
im shinin
yes sir
im so hood
jello
pop it

2007-03-16 18:13:29 · 3 answers · asked by w@t U r3pPiN fOoL??? tHiZz!!! 2 in Music

2007-03-16 18:13:21 · 16 answers · asked by Robin W 4 in Polls & Surveys