ODE TAE A FART
Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie
Just as ye sit doon among yer kin
There starts to stir an enormous wind
The neeps an tatties and mushy peas
Start working like a gentle breeze
But soon the pudding wi the sauncie face
Will have ye blawin all ower the place
Nae matter whit the hell ye dae
A’body’s gonna hae tae pay
Even if ye try tae stifle
It’s like a bullet oot a rifle.
Hawed yer bum tight tae the chair
Tae try an stop the leakin air
Shift yersel fae cheek tae cheek
Pray tae God it disnae leak
But awe yer efforts go asunder
Oot it comes like a clap o thunder
Ricochets aroon the room
Michty me! A sonic boom!
God almighty it fairly reeks
Hope ah huvne **** ma breeks
Tae the bog ah better scurry
Aw, whit the hell, it’s no ma worry
A’body roon aboot me choking
Wan or twa are nearly bokin
I’ll feel better for a while
Cannae help but raise a smile
Wis him! I shout with accusing glower
Alas! Too late he’just keeled ower
Ye dirty bugger they shout and stare
Ah feel welcome nae mair
Were e’re ye go, let yer wind gang free
Sounds like just the job for me
Whit a fuss at Rabbie’s party
Ower the sake o wan wee farty!
R.S. Burns
Its Fast
2006-11-02
23:20:43
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11 answers
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asked by
zorroorojo
3
in
Jokes & Riddles