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I found out I had genital herpes in January. My boyfriend got a blood test and he tested negative. I must have gotten it from a previous partner. My boyfriend was very supportive about the disease and we were careful so he never contracted it. Recently, we broke up (not because of the disease). I'm sure I'm not ready to start dating again yet, but when I am I'm not sure how to go about it. I know I have to tell my partners and I will continue to be careful. Can I date those who don't have herpes? Will they be willing to date me? Help!

2007-09-22 15:49:17 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health Diseases & Conditions STDs

7 answers

I have had genital herpes for almost 7 years and I've dated several guys who didn't have genital herpes and even one guy who did have genital herpes. ALL of them were VERY nice and super supportive of me. None of them ran away screaming or anything when I told them what I have.

My longest relationship was almost 4 years with a guy who did not have the virus and he never contracted genital herpes from me during those 4 years.

Right now I'm in a 2 year relationship with my fiance. He, unfortunately, did contract the virus from me but that hasn't changed our relationship or how we feel about each other.

You just need to be open and honest about it. Don't tell someone on your first date, but definitely tell them before you get really involved and become more intimate. I gave my fiance (boyfriend at the time) some websites to look at about the virus so that he could understand more about it and how it is to live with genital herpes.

Don't worry too much about it! There are tons of great guys out there who could care less if you have genital herpes. Good luck and take care!

2007-09-22 22:28:51 · answer #1 · answered by Alli 7 · 2 0

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2016-05-01 12:46:41 · answer #2 · answered by Adam 3 · 0 0

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2016-08-31 11:23:17 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0 0

Yes you can date anyone you want, but be prepared... Not everyone knows about HSV, so you may get responses that are not so favorable to your liking. Dating can be easy but, becoming intimate can be a whole different story, hunnie :) They do have dating sites for people who would rather date and become intimate those with the same situation as you, example (Antopia, or Positive Singles)..just to name a couple... You have to be prepared to give, "The Talk" as we call it...it ain't always easy to tell someone that you have a STI and expect them to understand it when they (1) know nothing about it only that it has no cure and(2) that it still can be transmitted through viral shedding and "thats with protection." However, you will meet those who don't care one way or the other :) They say she's a nice girl and she's the one for me. So it's all about how thick your skin is gurl...thats the deciding factor. Like I said, before dating you is one thing, but being intimate is a whole different story. Just use your protection, eat right, cut down on the stressing and take your meds (if you choose too) and you will be alright!

I know cause I'm 39 and I've lived with HSV2 since 1997. So i got a whole lotta personal information on dating, hunnie!

2007-09-23 12:41:26 · answer #4 · answered by Samiyahdeen4lyfe 2 · 0 0

Yes, you should tell your partner that you have Herpes. it is ur responsibility to give the partner the truth.

Genital herpes infects more than 1 of 5 adolescents and adults, the CDC says. Most couples deal successfully with herpes all the time. In most cases, it is only a minor inconvenience.

You can find many support for Herpes singles. I recommend a herpes blog to you. You will find many related information and you can post your personal problem on it: http://www.positivesingles.com/blog/hgirlemily

2007-09-25 14:22:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Of course you can date people who don't have herpes, and lots of them will be willing to date you. In fact lots of them also have herpes - one in five men has it.

I caught herpes exactly a year before you. Unlike so many on here suggest, I wasn't prepared to limit myself to others with herpes, I want to date who I like, and I have told three men. All were positive and not at all fazed, they all still wanted to have a relationship with me and it didn't put them off sex with me at all. One man confessed he had had warts a couple of years previously when I told him I had herpes - I know for a fact he never would have told me if I hadn't told him I had herpes. Lots of people have skeletons in the closet.

I have told one man after we had sex for the first time, one man when we started to date right at the beginning and one ex boyfriend I got back together with. None of them reacted negatively and all were supportive. If a man says he really likes you and then runs when you tell him you have herpes, I really really don't think he is worth it.

2007-09-22 23:26:41 · answer #6 · answered by mayflower25 6 · 0 0

Yes, you can.

You must be vigilant regarding outbreaks. You cannot have sex until the sores are completely gone. The herpes virus is highly contagious and a condom may not provide all the protection needed.

You can see your health care provider about medication that can shorten your outbreaks when they happen.
Also you can boost your immunity by taking a multivitamin, getting plenty of rest and starting a healthy diet.

When you do start becoming intimate, its important you are honest and upfront about this.

There is nothing to be ashamed of. Its just a condition. It says nothing about you personally.

Hope this helps! :)

2007-09-22 16:00:50 · answer #7 · answered by aisydaisylady 4 · 3 0

Trust me, the right person for you will not mind if you have herpes. Definitly don't like tell them you have it on your first date though! You will know when the time is right to tell that special someone. Just be like "Hey I really like you, but I just have to be up front with you" And tell them.

If they don't want to go out with you, it wasn't meant to be.
Don't get down on yourself, millions of Americans have herpes.

2007-09-22 16:03:16 · answer #8 · answered by Adria 2 · 2 0

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