I just found out I have genital herpes?

Question

I'm confused, depressed, angry, and I feel violated. Although I know it doesn't matter, I've only had 2 sexual partners at the age of 22. Do any of you have any advice or could share experiences with me to help me get over the shock of all of this???

Thanks

Answer 1

It's coming to you as a shock now but believe me it will pass! I got genital herpes right after I turned 17! I was in total shock and had the full range of emotions you are having too. Now that I have had it over 5 years I really don't even think about it. It is honestly one of the last things on my mind. The only time I ever think about it is if I hear someone talking about it or I happen to see a Valtrex commercial or something. Other than that, I never think about it.

And if you are worried about future relationships, don't be. I am in a great relationship with my fiance. He accepted the fact I had genital herpes and knew he would probably get it from me. There are a lot of people that look past the STD because they care so much about the person. All you need to do is be a tad more careful then the average person now because you don't want to pass it on to someone else and having genital herpes makes you more susceptible to getting other STDs including HIV.

Hope this helped! Good luck to you, you'll be fine!

Answer 2

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Answer 3

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Answer 4

I know exactly how you feel. I found out Oct 2004 that I had herpes it was the worst thing ever. I felt like God didn't love me. But now its even harder for me because I am now 9 months pregnant and my baby is due August 12 and its hard because my son could get an eye infection if I have an active infection during delivery; So a C section is recommended..I dont wanna be cut up. I honestly feel like I ruined my life because when I am 60 years old I will still have herpes if I live that long. I just pray everyday that I don't get an outbreak until I deliver. Because its the worst feeling in the world to think that you can give your newborn a disease and they are just completley helpess. But something that I have found with me personally is when ever i get depressed or stressed I have an outbreak. And Valtrex doesnt really help me because I have had an outbreak and taken the drug and I have had an outbreak and not taken the drug and the heal time for me was the same. Also if I rub my vagina sometimes while its dry I get an outbreak. other than that I don't get to many outbreaks. It's still hard for me to deal with now I just pray that one day soon there will be a cure because its not worth it.

Answer 5

First:
Don't blame yourself. It can happen to anyone, even a virgin. You're a victim, just like the rest of us who got H from a partner that didn't have enough respect to tell us.

Second:
Get support. You'll feel a lot more normal when you start talking to others with H. There are local support groups in or near almost any metropolitan area. A FANTASTIC site to meet other people with hsv and hpv for dating or support is http://www.mpwh.com. 50,000 members and growing fast. It's free to join with a limited membership, but I would suggest a full membership. Their discussion boards there can be incredibly helpful and healing. There are many other H related dating sites though this one is the biggest.

Third:
Respect yourself. You are NOT damaged goods. Herpes is NOT life threatening. With treatment, it may never pop up again though you will always have it. 1 out of 4 women and 1 out of 5 men have genital herpes though only 10% of them know it according to the Center for Disease Control.

Fourth:
Respect others. Herpes can spread without symptoms and from parts of the body not covered by a condom. You have to consider yourself contagious at all times for the safety of your partners. You also owe it to them to let them know you have it, let them know the risks, and let them make an informed decision on whether to pursue a sexual relationship with you.

Fifth:
EVERYTHING happens for a reason.

Answer 6

So sorry that you suffer. There are medications that can limit the severity and the duration of outbreaks IE Valtrex, Zovirax. Even if you are not having visible symptoms, you still can spread the disease.Since it is a virus, there is no cure.This will take time but you have every right to be angry and experience every facet of the grieving process: shock and disbelief, denial, anger,bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Columbiahelp.com can be a source of help and support. I pray that you gain control of this disease and free yourself from the stigma associated with it. I am so sorry for your sadness, but I believe that you will find the strength to overcome. You are a very valuable person and deserve so much more.

Answer 7

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Answer 8

I don't really have any personal experience to relate to this, but I just want to say that I can imagine what it must feel like to have that come as a surprise to you. I'm sure you had no reason to believe that either partner had it, so either they hid it or were themselves ignorant of it.

*hugs*

Answer 9

Take care of your body naturally. You will feel much better about yourself and future partner.

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Answer 10

hey i know somebody who has it and well...its a horriable thing just remember to stay on the meds the doctor prescribes and always tell your partner(s) about it even if it humiliating.you will find someone who will want to be with you whether you have it or not.it is the most common STD. please be safe.. GOOD LUCK!