I am 16 years old and I have been going out with this girl for nearly 2 1/2 months now. It is the fastest relationship growth I have ever known. We met on 06/09, she had a bf, we fell in love by 15/09, 1st kiss 22/09, my feelings for her were growing so fast i couldn't control them so we decided to try to take it easy, she dumped her bf. 16/10 we started going out.
Basically, we have grown together so much it is inconceivable that I could spend the rest of my life with anyone else. Our roots have become permanently entwined. We have fought many problems and difficulties already and have decided mutually, that we will be together forever.
Yesterday, we discussed getting engaged. I really really want to, but, I am only 16. She is 17. If we were to get engaged I would receive so many lectures saying that its too soon to commit to anything, that you can't know a person well enough at 2 1/2 months, to make that decision.
I know in my heart that I will be with her forever. Is it too soon?
2007-12-27 22:26:22 · 24 answers · asked by Jeff 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Calling her my girlfriend and being her boyfriend just doesn't do the truth of the relationship justice.
Just like saying 'i love you'.
neither of them satisfy the need to express my feelings. the word 'love' isnt good enough.neither is 'girlfriend'
2007-12-27 22:36:07 · update #1
i would get lectures too about getting engaged. i think it may be a little too soon but i think that it's sweet that you want to stay with her for the rest of your lives. it is obvious that you have strong feelings for this girl and she is lucky to have someone like you. if you feel that the time is right then you should go for it and get engaged. You can have a long engagement, you don't have to get married straight away. i think this idea would make your parents and family more at ease with the idea of your engagement. Good luck!
2007-12-27 22:36:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
At your age, it really makes no sense to be engaged. You wouldn't (I hope) actually be getting married for several years, and yes, you will get nothing but lectures from everyone. It's not so much that it's too soon, as that you are both way too young.
If it really is as right as you feel it is, what's the rush? If you have this agreement with each other, why do you need to make it public? I know it's tempting to shout it from the rooftops when you fall in love, but it would be wiser now to wait for that & just be happy you're together.
2007-12-28 11:39:25 · answer #2 · answered by Mich 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just enjoy the relationship -no rush - don't worry about getting engaged or anything yet. Wait until you are both out of school and see how things develop when you are earning a living. I met my wife when she was 17 - got engaged when she was 20 , married when she was 21 - that was 40 years ago - so you have plenty of time !
2007-12-28 06:38:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
What about a promise ring? If you give her that then it's almost like an engagement ring, but not pushing it. Then when you both feel ready, maybe in a couple years you can surprise her with an engagement ring! I'd wait until you're atleast 18 for that though. I was in a relationship much like yours when I was your age and after highschool things just didn't work out like we expected and now Im happily engaged to someone else!
2007-12-28 10:46:40 · answer #4 · answered by chaychayolei 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is silly. .very VERY rarely will "high school sweethearts" last through a lifetime of being in a relationship. Your still really young and I'm sure this is the exact opposite of what you'd like to hear but maybe you should just slow down and take a step back and look at things from a different perspective. Like realistically, your 16 you haven't even begun to know what life has to throw your way. Regardless of how you feel. .and how do you really know she feels the same back? All the serious-ness could just be pushing her away. .Not right away but eventually she could leave you. .
2007-12-28 06:49:34 · answer #5 · answered by Michelle 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
So love her forever. That is fine. Give her a promise ring. Do not get engaged at this point.
Finish your education. Start your career. Save up some money for wedding expenses and expenses of the new household. Then get engaged.
Yes, that will take some time . . . several years. But if your love is meant to be forever, it will stand the test of time.
There is no sense in getting engaged until your education is completed.
2007-12-28 06:39:42 · answer #6 · answered by Suz123 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are way too young to be making these decisions. It is perfectly appropriate for you two to be in love and hang out every day, but getting engaged should not be a thought in your mind. You have to finish high school, go to college, then you will be in a position to really and truly fall in love because you will know who YOU are. You are going to change so much over the next 6 years...don't get yourself stuck in a situation that won't allow you to take care of yourself. If you truly love her now, keep dating, finish school, go to college together, then get married. No rush. If your bond is as strong as you say it is, your relationship will survive the next 5-6 years without being married.
2007-12-28 08:57:18 · answer #7 · answered by Level Headed, I hope 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
How do you know she didn't have these same feelings with her previous BF ?
What I mean is , if she was quick to dump him for you.What makes you think she won't dump you for the next best thing?
Be careful and don't get too emotionally involved so soon. Give it some time.If you still feel the same way in 6 months, then get engaged.The world isn't going anywhere to be in such a hurry.
2007-12-28 06:45:55 · answer #8 · answered by Eric D 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are absolutely positive you want to be with her the rest of your life, then you can afford to wait till you are older to become engaged. You both still have a long road ahead of you to finish school and establish yourselves in good jobs. Both of you need to concentrate on that so that when you get married, you will have the income to support each other. A big part of love is putting the other person's needs ahead of what you want and the reality is financial stability is something you both need to be thinking about.
2007-12-28 06:41:51 · answer #9 · answered by jingles 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I got engaged at 16 to my first love, what we felt for each other was so intense, and I truly believed we would be together forever, but within 8 months, he had dumped me! I was heartbroken, I felt as if nobody else had ever suffered such pain.
But I got over it (and definitely got ove him!) just as quickly as I "fell in love"
Do I regret it? Hell no! It was sweet whilst it lasted, and ok it wasn't to be, but who's to say your relationship won't last? You never no until you try. Maybe you could set a date in say 6 months time, and if you are still both head over hills in love, then get engaged, what have you got to lose? Good luck
2007-12-28 06:43:25 · answer #10 · answered by MissEssex 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋