Before my girlfriend met me she had an affair with a married guy. For 2 years they had the affair I know IM not perfect. My problem is that she thinks she has done no wrong. Everytime we have talked about she always defends hIM like he is a victim. I see infidelity as immoral and wrong she has no remorse whatsoever. She blames the wive she says she would never do it again but when I hear her talk about it I can't help but wonder. All I hear from her is about what a nice guy he is. she blames me for scaring him off because she wanted to be friends with him While we were together. I love her a lot but i don't want to be with someone who thinks it's acceptable to have an affair with a married man.
2007-12-27 20:45:28 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
sorry friend, but maybe it's just time to move on.
2007-12-27 20:48:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There can be some affair of with a married man ....that's not uncommon.Liking has no limit ; just has no boundary whatsoever.Why dwell on her past relationship .If she loves you as husband , that's perfectly ok.She may have a liking for the earlier person just as a good friend.That's acceptable.But, this shouldn't go anything beyond that.
It's better, if both of you stop talking of similar past relationships and try to forget the old episode completely.Family peace, love and respect for each other are very important in a married life
2007-12-27 21:01:23 · answer #2 · answered by bikashroy9 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know it's hard but i would definantely try to move on and get over her...i understand that maybe sometimes people do change..but if she's still defending him and gets so worked up over him..who's to say that she doesn't have feelings for him..and could possible be having an affair again or at least considering it..you can't put all your trust, heart, and hope into someone like that. and it's not okay to have an affair with someone who is married no matter what is going on. and i wouldn't want her to be friends with him either if i were you. good luck to you, i hope everything works out for the best... remember, everything happens for a reason...you can't shut out how you truly feel
2007-12-27 20:53:04 · answer #3 · answered by //\\FAME//\\ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you're smart and she's lucky to have you.
But I really think it's up to her to prove herself worthy of your trust. If she can't gain your trust then she's not for you.
You can't make her not be "friends" with this married guy and since you already know she feels no remorse for being involved with her married friend, maybe this is a wakeup call
for you because it could happen again...behind your back. Not that it would, but it could. You say you love her, so I would talk with her about how much she values your relationship...in that infidelity is not one of your hobbies and that you hope that she keeps her friendship with this man just that...friends. But I'm sorry to say, in my opinion, once sleeping buddies, this "friends" term she uses is a sad excuse. For example, married people can divorce and remain friends...but aldulterers are sleeping buddies...they crossed that friendship line. Don't trust her till she proves herself worthy. If she continues to see this so called friend,,,
dump her...you'll find someone better with good moral values.
2007-12-27 21:05:09 · answer #4 · answered by sunoverla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can't ever be sure of what someone else will or won't do, but it does seem like she doesn't have a problem with cheating. If she could so easily make excuses for a married man cheating on his wife, I'd bet it's even easier to justify cheating on a boyfriend. I'm sorry, but I would be wary. Its a shame you have to live with doubt but if you're questioning her and what she may be doing maybe reconsider the relationship or talk it out with her. I wouldn't want to be with anyone who found cheating acceptable in any situation.
2007-12-27 20:54:06 · answer #5 · answered by Truth 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has no moral fiber. You need to get rid of her. If she thinks it's ok to sleep with a married man she's going to feel it's acceptable to cheat on her husband. Sounds like she's already asking you to let her continue on with the affair on the side of your relationship. IOW it's just a matter of time before you catch her screwing him behind your back.
2007-12-27 20:58:44 · answer #6 · answered by work it 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes,i do understand you,i had a g/f who did the same thing.She believe that what she did was right,b/c she felt the guy belong to her.And the affair would have continue if i never came into the picture.I would leave her alone b/c she has no respect for herself.Good luck.
2007-12-27 21:00:09 · answer #7 · answered by cancel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No its not acceptable at all. If the husband wasnt happy in their marriage, he should have left her before starting something else. Ask your girlfriend if she'd blame herself and be fine with you if you had an affair?
I bet she wouldnt be fine about it!
2007-12-27 20:48:50 · answer #8 · answered by KJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a serious issue. I think your relationship is doomed because she has no morals, and you obviously do. You can't make her think the way that you do, so can you accept that she is morally corrupt? If not, you're going to have to send her on her way.
2007-12-27 21:30:26 · answer #9 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you. Once a person acts in this way; without any remorse, they are sure to act that way again.
2007-12-27 20:52:05 · answer #10 · answered by what u talkin' bout? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
! she is definately not not the right person for you. You should forget about her cos she will never be yours truly. she's after this married guy and she's doing very wrong. She dosnt deserve you!
2007-12-27 20:52:03 · answer #11 · answered by cherry babe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋