Why is my son hitting so much?

Question

My 17 month old son is starting to hit alot and it bothers me. He seems okay until other kids come around especially his nephew. I try putting him in time out and explaining it to him that it is not right, but he continues to do it. He hits and throws things. My bfs family is starting to bother me. They are always telling me it is not normal and they don't understand where he would get it from and that they have never seen a child hit like he does...blah blah. Anyway...I don't know what to do. We do not teach him this at all. What can I do?

Answer 1

I don't konw why people say things like that. OH I have never seen a child act like that.blah blah blah. BULL****! My daughter went through a hitting phase at around 18 months and it lasts for 2 months and then she stopped for four months and for some reason she is doing it again. It's just another phase. your son will get over it espesially once he starts speaking well. kids go through phases and they suck so bad while you are going through them but you always have to think everything is a phase!!!!!!

Answer 2

Why is he hitting ?
At this age it is common for kids to hit others if the other has a toy or something they want.They do not understand that others feel physical harm or that there is anything wrong in getting what you want.They are very self centered at this age. It is common.They still can't be expected to play "with " others although they will play next to others.They do not understand taking turns or that anyone else in the world has feelings.
You do have to let him know that hitting is never good .He doesn't know it by himself.
Does he watch cartoons ? They contain so much violence and every one hits and punches others .
Pick Tv or tapes that allow for entertainment without violence.
Let him know that any time he hits, he is going to time out.Time out is not a punishment.It is simply removing the child from the fun and placing him alone for a short amount of time.About 1 minutes per year of age.A 17 month old will do best with one full minute of time out.
After time out is over, hug him and tell you that you love him but that hitting is bad.
At first he will not understand and do it again and again.Never hurt him. Just gently place him in time out and say " you are in time out for hitting "
Again go get him after 1 minute and continue for several days till he gets the idea.
I wish you all the best.

Answer 3

Do you want an answer or not? If yes, don't give this a thumbs down. It really has a lot to do with the fact that he cannot verbalize his anxieties, yet. He instead shows it by hitting. Hold his hands in your hand and go down to his eye level and say firmly: " No! We do not hit people." Go with him to time out and tell him that you both will join the others only until he calms down. Encourage him to have you help him communicate what he wants or expects from the others. When the kids are in his territory, make sure to have a special container for toys he wants to share with others and another that has the toys he doesn't want to share with others. Explain this to the relatives and the kids. Mom,... be there- observe, and prevent.

Answer 4

You need to let him know that hitting is bad and when you express this you must be at eye level with him, speak firmly and then an effort must be made to curtail the behavior, if you threaten to punish you have to follow through. When ever you see him hit, remove him from the area, do not give him other toys or treats or allow others near, you must talk to him constantly. I will get excommunicated from answers for this but maybe the next time he hits you should slap him on the hand and relate how when he hits it hurts just like when he got his smack on the hand...there, you tell a child the stove is hot and then he puts his little hand there anyway....painful or shocking lessons tend to stick with us th longest. You are the boss mom and you need to let him know you wont tolerate hitting.

Answer 5

Well if he's asking for something and he hits you, then don't give it to him. No matter how many times he screams and yells and throws things, don't give it to him while gently explaining that it's rude to yell and bad to hit. Give him an angry look and be stern with him. The only reason he'd hit is because he thinks that you will give up to him if yo udo enough and he'll get what he wants, or he thinks that his place is above yours. Let him know where his place is and who should be respected.
Challenge him - ask him why is he hitting you. You might want to watch what he watches on tv, and keep him away from your nephew. If he hits you around kids the next time, after they're gone, tell him that they're not coming back because of the way they acted. And until you see a change in his actions, don't let them. I know it sounds harsh, but he's not going to get it if you don't force it.

Answer 6

Some children like to hit, because they become jealous or don't want anyone playing with their toys. When my son would hit I to would give him time outs and they really didn't work, finally one day he hit me on my face and nose(i saw all types of stars with that hit) and I reacted by slapping his hand, when I realized what I did I apologized and told asked him if it hurt and he cried and said yes, I told him you hurt me too. My nose was hurting and started to bleed. After me hitting him he never hit again. I am not telling you to hit him only that maybe a light hit to the top of the hand so he can feel that it hurts, and maybe he will quit. Or than that stick to the time- outs and take away his favorite toys, all you can do is hope that the time outs work.
Good luck! you are trying your best so don't feel like it is your fault child is hitting I know you aren't teaching him to hit.

Answer 7

He is hitting because he is letting everyone know that this is HIS space. The other child is an intruder and he doesn't like it. At 17 months babies don't understand "sharing" and your boyfriends family are a bunch of nuts because it IS normal. Obviously they've never been around a pair of toddlers. Hopefully none of them are in the day care business because they'd never be able to cope with 20-30 toddlers LMAO

Answer 8

I have four kids, and my brother has two. They're all close in age. My son (he's 13 months) hits alot. The other ones weren't as bad about it, except my nefew (he was a biter too) They go through stages, he's still a baby and he will stop sooner or later. As far as your bf's family I would tell them that you are doing what you can and at least he's not a biter. I mean seriously, it could be worse.

Answer 9

Hitting is one form of tantrum. This is normal part of child development.

I think the best thing you can do is intervene. Don't give him a chance to hit you... or stop him in the process.

Grab his hands and look him right in the eyes and tell him in a very stern voice, "No hitting, be nice to your Mommy." Show him that you are the boss... I know he is only 17 months, but it sounds like there is a little bit of a power struggle going on... especially since he only does it to you.

Sometimes we just need to understand from their point of view as they cannot fully express themselves.
Read useful information to understand and how to deal with similar situations

Answer 10

You might need to see your friend away from the children for a while. It could be that her son is just to immature to show his feelings any other way. So for a few months meet her and have Lunch, or coffee, or a walk with just her to keep the friendship intact, and after, say, 6 months or so reintroduce the 2 boys. Young children have short memories, and the 2nd "first" meeting may result in a close friendship.