I dont mean to sound rude, but I cant stand my family! Help?

Question

I need some advice on dealing with grandparents. I try to ignore them but they irritate me so much. I never bother to comment on their arguments because they're stupid and will never admit that they're wrong. They're here taking vacation with their 14wk puppy. I've been playing with the dog and feeding, taking it outside, and following and picking stuff out of it's mouth while she sits her bum on the sofa saying "Raising puppies is hard work. It just isnt all play, you need to be responsible." She is so annoying and treats me like I'm stupid. No offense but even a mentally challenged person can keep an animal and I've raised dogs before. She has never owned a puppy.

She does this about everything I do and treats me so childish.
I cannot take it any longer. Please help?

AND PLEASE DO NOT mention sitting down and talking with them. It never works and my grandmother gets furious and leaves.

I do respect my elders. Not only are most my friends way older, I volunteer at retirement homes. I respect my elders so please dont tell me other wise.

And telling her to close her "trap" would cause World War III in this house. You really dont understand her, she is completely miserable.

Answer 1

Well now you have learned something that all grown-ups know.....You can`t choose your relatives, and you can`t easily get rid of them. So take a deep breath, smile and put up with them for a little longer, it will soon be time for them to go home.

Answer 2

I think she knows good and well she has bitten off more than she can chew as she hasn't a clue about taking care of the puppy and because you know exactly what to do for it, she gets a real inferiority complex and takes it out on you.

Just remember, the vacation Will be over and maybe she is secretly watching what you do and can take that knowledge back home along with the puppy and take better care of it,thanks to your kindness.

Then again, maybe she just enjoys being obnoxious. I am not picking on grandma, I am one and a great grandma and am blessed that they all love me and like to be around me because I don't put them down and have fun with them. I feel sorry she is so unkind. Maybe she never was shown love by her family and so maybe you can bear it and cut her some slack.

Treat her with courtisy when you are around her no matter how mean she gets and she knows how disgusting she is acting and will see the difference in yours and her attitude -and pray for her and for yourself to be kind to her. People aren't born into this world mean so something must have happened in her childhood to make her this way or else she is daling with health issues -that is not an excuse but someimes when people aren't feeling well, they take it out on the handiest one around.

Answer 3

Sounds like a longstanding dislike.

I got along fine with my grandparents for the most part, but gram did baby me and sometimes it got to me.

My MIL is the one who constantly tried to tell me how to run my life, and that I was doing everything all wrong. She also tried to tell me how to do things that she had never done, and really didn't know how to do. Yeah, she thought I was stupid, and not good enough.

The one thing I will disagree with you on is your comment that "even a mentally challenged person can keep an animal" because, if that were true, we wouldn't have all these animals in rescue.

You've raised dogs before and you know how to care for and raise a dog, and nothing that she can say will change that fact.

What worked for me with my MIL was to decide that I didn't care what she thought or said. When she'd start telling me what to do, or why she thought I was all wrong, I just sorta turned my ears off. I stopped listening, and just kept saying "uh huh... uh huh..." and I chose to not listen or remember her comments. I finally understood that she was an ill person. Her illness involved self-hate and she tried to attack others before they could attack her. She was too old to change, and it was her right to stay unhealthy.

Once I did that, I was much happier and she no longer bothered me. It was really nice.

If you can forgive your GP for being old, and having a kind of mental illness, and accept that it's their right to not become healthy, I think you'll be able to ignore them and if you can do this, you'll be much happier.

I hope you try this. I pray that it works for you as well as it did for me.

Answer 4

Some people just are that way no matter what you say to them or how you respond. Unfortunately we can't pick our relatives, BUT, we can keep in our minds that they are not the right. Visualize a band-aid on her forehead. It will remind you the stuff she says is unhealthy. She is 'mentally challenged' more or less because she doesnt understand that what she says is inappropriate. Usually people who are terribly insecure behave this way so they appear smarter than the group. They wont discuss it at the risk of being wrong. Be patient. Believe it or not, its good training for when you are an adult working in an office full of these people!

Answer 5

The problem with kids now days they are all rude to everybody.Yes our family drive us crazy But if you take a step back and really listen to them you could learn new things.I know they repeat themselves.Grandparents have been set in their ways for 40 to 60 yrs and I teenage come up with a attitude and start doing thing their way will upset them.Instead of getting hot under the collar ask grandmother what is the puppy's schedule when does it eat and goes podding.Take the time and listen,I mean listen to them.if you show a little respect to your grandparents the may show you the respect back it goes both ways,I work with alot of teenages and I put them together older people and this is the conflict I see.the young people disrespect the older people but it goes both ways.I have seen some amazing friendships form.It's all about respect you have to earn it.

Answer 6

Tell them next time she brings up raising a dog is hard work story say : " Oh I know ! I remember when I had my dog so and so [dogs name ] and the dog did this and that and l corrected the dog and the dog never did it again" just to shut her up! The GOOD thing is they are on vacation and will be going soon ! Keep telling yourself that ! Try to keep yourself busy, can you go to a store for a couple of hours or visit a friend?
Good Luck!

Answer 7

dude you just answered your own question man. You said that sitting down and talking with them makes them go away, so do it. quit being a puss and go stand up to them. Just because they are your GP doesnt mean that you must respect or listen to them. Give em a piece of your mind, what are they going to do? if they were violent or something like that then id understand, but obviosly there is nothing you want from them so let em know that you want nothing to do with anything that they are about, and maybe they will get a clue, or maybe they will storm out upset that someone could be so rude, either way they are gone, and you have told em off.

Answer 8

Hey I think you should take a stand. If its your house tell them how you feel let them know that your are still their granddaughter and that they drive you crazy! With the insults, the put downs. Tell your parents (if the house belongs to them) let them know that you don't want to be a be around this type of environment. Hey old people can be very stubborn too. And sometimes it may result into something very emotional. Its okay to let them know about your feelings. hey they're old people, and your young, you can draw the line and let them know whos more mature. Ok good luck and take care

Answer 9

Teenage years...what can i say. He's going to act like this no matter what. I have a brother too and he drives me crazy. no matter how hard you try to tell him right from wrong they just never get it. It's best to be the bigger person here... you can try talking to him but it seems you've run out of options. When he is at the house just lay down the law. That's the most advice i can give.

Answer 10

Whenever she tells you that, ask her to show you or tell you the way she would do it. Tell her you want to be more responsible and you need her advice. It is sad that you feel like you are dealing with them. Grandparents die sooner that we are ready for them to. We can not change them. The best we could do it respect and empower them. At makes you and adult when you do this. It seems important to you that you are not childish.