Regrets...Is it haunting you? Dont fade away from me.?

Question

i met this guy once online. cutting the story short we both fell for each other. we would both race to an internet cafe everyday so we can read and exchange emails. i became so fond of him..in fact loved him dearly. he was kind and sweet and he listen to my woes and lifes trevails. he even went to rent a cd of a movie that i told him i watched with friends. there was just something so sincere about the things he does that caught me off guard.

but i was caught up in my own troubles. my own crazy world. i left needing to be on my own thinking that we're just too good to be true. so i just disappeared online and never went back after a year. i came back looking for him realizing that i made a mistake and i was sorry.

but i was too afraid and guilty to say how sorry i was and how i want him back. he did reply to my message which i kept all these years. he was on his way to canary islands he said and he wont be able to talk to me as he'll be at sea. that's the last i heard from him

I was in the hospital for a heart problem and was not able to go online for months. I went back after I got out and sought him again. I never heard from him again. Day after day, week after week, year after year, I send messages. Emails. No reply. I realized maybe he thinks am just fooling around. I wish I could have just told him how sorry I am and that I do love him. And here I am alone starting to realize I should move on. Maybe he did already. But always, my day begins with thoughts of him. JP, I am so sorry wherever you are.

Answer 1

I'm sorry this happened to you; if there is one upside to this entire event it's that you have fresh reinforcement on the wisdom of never wasting time. But I would not necessarily give up trying to find him...emotionally that ship may have long since sailed for him, or maybe not. But either way there wil be some closure for both of you, and that's a good thing even by itself.
Personally speaking I have very few regrets (at least consciously)...sure, there are some things I wish I had done better, but they are not reasonably elevated to the status of bona fide regret. Maybe they don't have to be for you, either. Your story may not be over yet. Good luck and Happy New Year.

Answer 2

I must admit I don't know anyone who was personally involved in an arranged marriage so I've never seen people fall in love based on that type of situation. But I know from personal experiences that the way you feel about someone when you were kids is very different from when you've reached adulthood. Just a little bit of contact over the phone and via Facebook won't let you really understand the person she's become today. So I'm worried that you will discover you have a very different view of her when you see her next year. On the positive side, if arranged marriages work as well as you seem to feel, it seems logical to assume that the more time you spend with each other after you are married, the closer you will get, and so those old feelings may be recreated. Think it over very carefully, and good luck to both of you.

Answer 3

You tale of woe sounds like the beginnings of a romance novel. It drew me in to keep on reading...

I feel for you. So many times I ask myself if I did the right thing when I have let someone go for so many different reasons that seemed so important at that time.

I do believe in fate. And maybe someday he will reappear...but not just in your dreams...but in an e-mail...or a letter...or you'll bump into him in a cafe.
And sometimes, some things were not meant to be.

You must keep on going through your life in hopes to meet another man who you will find charming and amusing, and perhaps you will be stronger and more ready to take on the challenge. Perhaps your timing will be better.

I wish you the best. Sweet dreams....

Answer 4

You have to realize that people change over the years and he may not even be the same person you once knew. It's best to move on. Live your life and don't go looking for love, because true love will find you when you least expect it

Answer 5

I feel your pain, but it really is too late to do anything about this person. Remember how things played out with him and don't ever let it happen again with any other friend you may get -- and that's just as true IRL as it is online.

Answer 6

wow... you really screwed that one up. He probably met some really nice and sweet girl on myspace and now they have 3 kids and live in a house with a white picket fence. in fact, his wife probably finds all of the emails that you sent him and deletes them. Or she thought he was cheating on her and now they are getting a divorce. separating the family . all because of you. just kidding;)

Answer 7

aw, i really hope that you get ahold of him. did you two ever exchange fone numbers or address? try writing him and calling him if so. i really hope that you find him because it sounds like you have found true love. continue writing him, maybe emails havent gotten through or something. dont give up if you really love him. if yu have ever seen the notebook, yu knoe that noah continued to write to ali for years and she never responded yet he continued to love her and in the end they lived happily ever after=]

Answer 8

Aw well i live by this, everything happens for a reason. You might miss him but god or whom ever you belive in will make it better. Life is about Downfalls and beautiful memories. Something good will happen in your future. be strong.

Answer 9

Come back to reality. You need to get out more and meet someone in the real world.

Answer 10

If anything starts out as "i wish....." If i could...." I would have....." and more then you can not change that stuff so let go and move on. This way you can get on with feeling good.