how do you take back something awful that you said to you dad?

Question

please dont tell me that im a "bad person", or a "mean person", or a "disrespectful teenager" because i already know that i am all of thoes things.
but i said something horrible to my dad, i told him that i hated him and that i hope he dies and that i hope he goes straight to he*l.
i regret saying that to him but he just made me so mad/upset. about 2 months ago he was diagnosed with really bad emphysema. he had to stop smoking and he is supposed to use oxygen. but today he put the oxygen tanks away and started smoking again! i was really mad that he started again, because he's killing himself! i dont want him to die and i was so proud of him for stoping smoking (he was still useing nicotin lozenges though) and then he just started up smoking again, so i got really mad and told him that i hope he dies and that i hate him and that i hope he goes to he*l.
im still upset with him for smoking, but i dont really mean what i said.now my dad wont talk to me, how can i take back what i said

Answer 1

You need to sit down with your dad and tell him that you love him and you did not mean what you said earlier. Tell him you said it out of anger, because you are concerned for his well-being. Explain to him that you were so proud of him when he quit smoking, and you really wish that he would continue. Tell him that you want him to be there for you for the many things to still come in your life. Explain that if he keeps smoking you do not feel he will be able to be there with you to experience these things.

Answer 2

Tell him the truth - that you are so frightened that you are going to lose him, and that the fact he started smoking again makes it look like he doesn't care enough to make the effort to stay healthy (sort of) so he can be with you longer. That it scares you. He will understand then that it was your love that makes you afraid for him.
Perhaps he's a bit ashamed of himself for the weakness of taking up the cigarettes again, and that's making him feel guilty too and over-reacting a bit. Maybe he's feeling hopeless, and that it wouldn't make much of a difference now. He is only human. Did you think of that?
Smoking is an addiction, and it can be very hard to give up in one go, especially if he's been doing it for years (and he probably has if he's sick from it). He just needs to know that you do love him, and will be there for him.
This is a hard time and you need each other more than ever. Try to be there for each other. That's what families do.

Answer 3

You need to go to your father and tell him how sorry you are that you said those things. Tell him you were very angry at him for starting back with his smoking and didn't want to watch him suffer himself to death and thought if you said something severe like that maybe he would put those cigarettes away for good. Tell him how much you love him and want him to live. Then give him a really big hug and never ever say anything like that to him again. You will feel so much better after you do this. Go and do it now, okay?

Answer 4

You can't take it back, but I know how frustrating you situation is...my dad is the same, except he hasn't been diagnosed yet. It sucks. You need to sit him down and tell him that you don't hate him, you just hate how he's killing himself. Talk to him from your heart and let him know how much it hurts you that he's doing this to himself. It stinks, but you'll figure out how to apologize.

Speak from your heart..
that's all I can say.

And your not that bad of a teenager, because you actually care that you may have hurt your father.

Answer 5

Calmly walk up to him.Put your arms around him.And say dad I am sorry for saying those mean things to you.But I care about you and love you.When I seen you light up again.All I could think about was you dying.
And next time think before you speak.Words can hurt.Express yourself with him.He is probably hurt just as much because he failed.Try not to rub it in.And remember if he doesnt have a problem with dying.You shouldnt.We all have to die.
Hope this helps.Good luck

Answer 6

You are NOT a bad person. You are a very smart teenager who does not want to lose their father. I think that a part of your father knows this. Just sit down with him and talk to him about your fears of losing him and this might be a good time to apologize for those things that you said. Tell him how much you want him to see you grow up into an adult and have children of your own. He might not care about losing his own life but you will lose a part of your life if he is gone. Tell him that.

Answer 7

apologize to him to start with. Let him know ho much you love him and do not want him to die. Try to find a quit smoking group locally that you can go with your dad to. Remember he is probably very scared and stressed out about this. The only way he will know how much you care is if you tell him. Good luck!!

Answer 8

i have said "i hate u" to my dad before and i know that hurt him bad enough. thats probably the worst i've said to him. i told him that i was sorry and said i loved him. and also said i wouldn't want a different dad. then just let things roll from there. try telling your dad what i've told mine. and tell him u dont want him to die.

Answer 9

You can't.

All you can do is help ease the wound.

Try to call him or write him an email or letter.

Apologize to him in person if at all possible.

Tell him you are there for him and are sorry.

Once you do that, that is all you can do. Then it will be up to him to forgive you.

Answer 10

tell him "dad i love u and i hope u would be alive and that i hope u go straight to heaven"