I'm a divorced mom of a 8 yr old son. My ex is remarried and I know his wife takes my son out shopping for his dad but i still like to get my son a little something to give his dad for holidays. For example this x-mas i got a nice frame that said " I love my daddy" and put in a photo i took of my ex and son together. What do you guys think about me doing this? In the 5 yrs of our divorce my ex never got my son a gift to give me (don't expect it) but am wondering if i'm wrong in doing this.
2007-12-27 07:58:23 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I think you are extremely thoughtful and are helping build a good relationship between your son and his father AND being a great example to your son of generosity of spirit.
Your son will appreciate this more when he's a man and sees for himself how ill-mannered and hostile other divorced people can and do behave toward one another. He will really know, then, that his mom is a class act!
What you are doing is the action of a peacemaker. Bless you!
2007-12-27 08:18:16 · answer #1 · answered by Tseruyah 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it's not wrong. Your child at 5 years old is not old enough to get a gift by himself so it's perfectly understandable that you would take him shopping. That your ex does not return the favor simply means that he is selfish and not as considerate as you are.
My mother did the same thing with my brother and I when we were younger. Our biological father behaved the same way as your ex. And it's good for your son to be able to give that gift because no one at his dad's house knows what it is beside him so he gets to have his own secret, for a while, and then he gets to enjoy his dad's reaction when he opens the gift. These are very good things for a young child to experience.
Peace,
Jenn
2007-12-27 16:04:53 · answer #2 · answered by jenn_smithson 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know, my dad has always given my mom something for Christmas, and my mom never has given him anything. I don't think there's a right and wrong to it. I think it has to do with what you're comfotable with. Besides, if you're giving it to him through you're son, it's kind of the same as giving your son money to buy it for him, which my parents did until I was old enough to buy my own gifts anyway.
2007-12-27 16:03:49 · answer #3 · answered by jenhunter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know that its tough being divorced and have children with them but i think that you are doing right. even though he is you ex but he is still your sons father and he will always be in the pic no matter what. it all about the kids any way. that just shows that you are a better person. keep up the good work.
2007-12-27 16:05:30 · answer #4 · answered by rockgirl_06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not wrong for doing this. Not at all! It's not like you're sending pictures of yourself in provocative attire over there, or doing anything else that would try to interfere in your ex's new marriage.
You're teaching your son to be thoughtful towards his father, even though things didn't work out between you and him.
Good for you!
2007-12-27 16:02:56 · answer #5 · answered by kcbranaghsgirl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's your child, why would it be wrong? I think it's great that you have such a giving nature and that you want to do nice things like that for your ex. I'm sure he wouldn't be offended. It's actually, kind of weird that the new wife does it if you ask me, but still cool.
2007-12-27 16:38:48 · answer #6 · answered by bainaashanti 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
great idea...that is too bad that ex does not help the child shop for parents but that happens...the important thing is how does it make your son feel when he gifts to his dad?
that look on your son's face is probably priceless
2007-12-27 16:05:22 · answer #7 · answered by Library Eyes 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's wonderful for your son to have a mom who regards his relationship with his father as such an important thing. It might make his own relationships more successful.
2007-12-27 16:12:38 · answer #8 · answered by Advantage-ME 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not at all. Your son will remember the gifts he got for his dad, and that's all that matters.
2007-12-27 17:11:42 · answer #9 · answered by Janice Dickinsons' Shrink 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are teaching your son a beautiful lesson - It is better to give than receive.
2007-12-27 16:03:44 · answer #10 · answered by Butterfly Lover 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋