Ok I am going to be getting married and i have my mother and my step mother and unity candles are only for the real parents so what would be some good suggestions to include my step mother too??
2007-12-27 06:49:09 · 9 answers · asked by lil_good_girl_2005 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You could still have her be seated at the wedding (seating of the mothers) and make sure she also has a corsage. Other than that I wouldn't worry about it.
2007-12-27 09:04:45 · answer #1 · answered by Mrs S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The church will probably not allow a step parent to light the unity candle, and that would be a slap in the face for your biological mother. Meet with your florist and have a special corsage designed for your step mother that will stand out from everyone else.
2007-12-27 07:20:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a wedding consultant, I have to keep it real. I would hope that your step-mother would respect the protocol and the fact that your biological mother would light the unity candle. Perhaps, sitting down with your step-mother and explaining the spirituality and the wedding protocol to her will help her understand, after all your biological mother has more emotions to consider - she birthed you.
I would include your step-mother in all the pictures, print her name in the program, have her do the prayer, and involve her in the other festivities, but the unity candle is sacred, so don't add anything to it, keep it spiritual, decent and in order.
If you are having a formal reception, as the names are called off in the wedding party as they enter, you can include her in the list of names as your step mother.
It's your day, don't be so concerned about the things that aren't important. If your biological parents are alive, do what is right by them, the "steps" should understand.
Good luck!
2007-12-27 07:04:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she can do a reading at your wedding.
If you have to explain to your step mother why she can't light the unity candle, I would use "biological parents" instead of "real parents" as she might fight the latter somewhat offensive.
2007-12-27 08:07:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you have to just do what you want. I have a step mother, a step father, HTB has a step mother, a step father (who is not invited), and a deceased mother. Trying to please everyone will be impossible (ordering flowers for all almost was), so we are just doing it our way.
My trying minute is planning who walks down the aisle (I'm walking alone), mom and dad, mom and stepdad then dad and stepmom or other way around, or no one at all. And then add seating on top of that!!
2007-12-27 07:15:08 · answer #5 · answered by Angela O 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Appearently, you should just explain to her that it is for the real parents, u don't have to include her, she'll get over it.
But if it means that much to her talk to your real mother and see if it would be ok to include the step-mother in the lighting.
2007-12-27 06:57:58 · answer #6 · answered by leaann2006 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You could have all of the parents light it together. Have your father and stepmother on one side and your mother and stepfather(if you have one) on the other. They can each share a lighting candle (so there are still two lighting one big one) or they can all have separate candles.
2007-12-27 06:54:55 · answer #7 · answered by Deanrijo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is a unity candle required? If you don't have to have one, maybe you can skip it so that you don't have to worry about offending anyone.
2007-12-27 09:26:11 · answer #8 · answered by sarah jane 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I second Deanri's idea!
2007-12-27 06:56:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋