He has been to the doctor and HE said that he said to spice things up. I have tried everything. He just seems like he doesn't want sex from me. I don't understand. He is 46 and I am 47. I keep in shape and dress sexy. Sex was good for the first year after that nothing. We might have sex every 2 or 3 months...HELP. I don't want a sexless relationship
2007-12-27 03:27:04 · 8 answers · asked by Cindy C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think you need a strapping young 27 year old to fullfill your needs!!
2007-12-27 03:30:21 · answer #1 · answered by Johnny Pumps 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This could be a lot of things.
Maybe he feels there are some underlying, unresolved tensions between you that are preventing him from feeling the freedom to enjoy intimacy with you. If he's carrying around a resentment about something, for instance, it can be interfering with and blocking his desire for sex with you.
Maybe he feels too much pressure to perform and only yields to sex when he's really in the mood.
Some people lose interest in sex in each other as their relationships lengthen, but many others retain an active and exciting sex life throughout.
Assuming his doctor agrees that there is no physical problem, there's something going on emotionally with him.
It does seem odd that the sex was great for a while and now it's dwindled so much. Sadly, some people after a while just are bored with their partners - they feel it's the same old thing, that it has become routine, it no longer tickles their libido. Same foreplay, same act, same everything.
One thing is missing from your question. You don't say that you have talked with him about this and tried to find his feelings about it.
Assuming he cares for you and wants your relationship to be a successful one, he should certainly engage in a frank and honest discussion with you. Maybe it is something simple that he wishes you would do and may be embarrassed to open up with you about it.
Naturally, you should offer to do the things he wants as long as nothing is potentially harmful.
Is he getting sexual release in any other way? Porn, strip clubs, pleasuring himself, and so on? It may be that the gratification he gets out of his fantasies is taking precedence over his real life with you.
Keep an open mind, be willing to try new things, walk on the wild side.
If all he will say "I'm just not interested anymore" and refuses to elaborate, you might want to suggest some relationship counseling with him.
You have every right to expect a satisfactory sex life in your relationship, and only you can determine what balance is acceptable to you and not acceptable to you.
Good luck.
2007-12-27 03:54:10 · answer #2 · answered by jasper addleton 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He could have a low testosterone level. That is what drives our sex drives. A sudden drop off in sex can indicate that his levels may have dropped. Is he under a lot of stress? Did he lose his job? Not get a promotion? Is he depressed? All of the above can have a major impact on a guys libido.
Talk to him about it, if he doesn't know why he doesn't want to do it as much anymore...ask him if he will go to a doctor for some tests. Only after you tell him about these testosterone levels dropping. This is NORMAL as men get older. Make sure to tell him that you love him and want to be with him etc.
2007-12-27 03:33:32 · answer #3 · answered by yogurt777 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
...WOW Cindy!!!....I don't really know anything about you two reasonably........but I can't hardly even imagine a physically and mentally healthy heterosexual male not wanting to have sex with a beautiful woman such as yourself really sweetie!
Have you two absolutely sat down together quietly with one another and discussed this particular circumstance with one another honestly?...... Counseling maybe?
I gotta believe you both have....but c'mon honey!.....every reasonably half normal guy on the planet wants to have sexual satisfaction with someone reasonably.....why not you conversely?
What is it about you two together seriously hun?
Send me more details darlin....cause something has absolutely run amuck here in paradise sweetie....and God only knows that most of the healthy minded 40 something women I've recently met can't seem to overtly get enough great loving honestly!
Surely this is your time hun......and absolutely we want you to be thrilled and wet with the outcome of course...but share somemore intimate stuff with us darling.....otherwise you might need to go out and get permission from your man within the context of stepping out of your relationship for your reward sweetie.
I'm not thinking this is what God intended for either of you two really...so cough up the beans on what you think might possibly be the dysfunction darlin...cool?
I'll be waiting babe!
2007-12-27 03:42:56 · answer #4 · answered by scott s 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You can always find yourself someone younger who would be willing. Some people as they get older, their sex drive goes down and that's probably what is happening to him.
2007-12-27 03:32:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
you're IN a sexless relationship, duh!
he's just not into sex
like it or leave it- one or the other
2007-12-27 03:31:14 · answer #6 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you need to have a serious discussion with him,it seems he is hiding something about his life for you,dont you know that he has a reason for not having sex with you for correct three years?just go to him this night express your feelings to him,talk to him,show him that you are in pains.................and let him know that you are serious about that............you are my fellow woman l know how you feel about that,just try this he has a secret that he hides for you.okay....love you byeeeeeeeeee.
2007-12-27 03:46:46 · answer #7 · answered by firstdiamond88 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
buy a toy, it will never let you down.
2007-12-27 03:36:21 · answer #8 · answered by Vitaliy D 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋