What would you do if your wife can't have children? Like you were newlyweds and you just found out..would you leave her?
And when choosing a wife, and a lady who you think is right for you can't have kids, would you still choose her for marriage or choose another woman?
Thanks =]
2007-12-27 03:26:51 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Ramadan
You see, I hate the thing were guys will marry a second wife. That's like..making the 1st wife feel bad!
2007-12-27 03:53:10 · update #1
I didn't say I hated that god said it..I hate how some men do it to their women just cause she can't have a child.
2007-12-27 06:33:52 · update #2
I would not leave her. We can either adopt (islamically with keeping the child last name as it was) or in islam marrying a second wife is permitted. I would probably prefer the second choice as the connection to your children is much stronger than that to an adopted child.
Edit:
If you hate something that Allah has permitted like marrying a second wife for the purpose of having children (i.e. halal) then good luck sister.
Edit 2:
If this is not a case where a second marriage is permitted then when is it permitted in your opinion? Why did Allah allow it? Sisters please be easy on the thumbs down, I know this is a touchy subject for you but this is life and reality.
Edit 3:
Are we better than prophet Ibrahim PBUH? He did marry Hagar because Sarah did not bring him any child. This is how he got Isma'il PBUH. Prophet Muhammad PBUH is a direct descendant of Prophet Isma'il. Only after many years and by a miracle of God that Sarah gave birth to Ishaq (Isac) PBUH.
http://www.islam101.com/history/people/prophets/ibrahim.htm
2007-12-27 03:45:30 · answer #1 · answered by Baybars 5 · 4⤊ 8⤋
So easy for some men to say that they will not leave their wife just because they cannot have children. The truth is, any man would whatever is the promise. And that is a fact of life
2007-12-29 05:45:38 · answer #2 · answered by pau 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You know, thats such a hard topic, I mean I'm a good person, but God knows I love kids more than anything else, so not being able to have mine would criple me, with that being said, I guess If I'm already married, it would be a sin for me to leave my wife because she cant have kids, but that might be the only justification for me to have 2 wives(if my wife agrees), cos I dont know if I can live without kids.now if I knew that before marriage, that would be hard, she would have to be someone that had suffered with me, or someone I have known for years for me to still mary her, I'm African, and my people are really perculia about having kids
2007-12-27 19:26:48 · answer #3 · answered by God's favorite 6 · 4⤊ 2⤋
So what if my wife can't have children? It's not her fault! Of course I won't leave her or choose another woman instead. We could always adopt children
2007-12-27 11:41:21 · answer #4 · answered by Saffy 2 · 8⤊ 3⤋
Get another wife without divorcing the former!
2007-12-30 01:44:14 · answer #5 · answered by Suryadi 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
a wife is not a baby producing machine
she is someone for you to spend your life with and someone that will love you so if my wife is infertile id support her and still be with her till the end
and if we decide we want a baby then we will adopt i already want to adopt kids when im married cuz so many kids need our help and love of being muslims
peace
2007-12-27 11:31:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 10⤊ 2⤋
no its not about making the first wife feel bad at all
you see if your husband and and wife love is strong and you both god fearing ppl and you know your husband would love kids then i personally would happily give him permission to get married again as long as i could be invovled wiht the children
its about your love for your husbands happiness and the love for your husband thruogh the love of allah
the society today has moulded our minds to thinking that having a second wife is bad and pitiful on the first wife
it is about changing your mind set
2007-12-27 12:32:49 · answer #7 · answered by pretty flower 5 · 6⤊ 4⤋
I think this is the most difficult decision ever a muslim man can take. Divorce is the worst option. adoption is not a option. If she agrees then have a second wife.
2007-12-27 13:47:31 · answer #8 · answered by nooru 3 · 5⤊ 5⤋
for even Muhammad stated "Jesus was a great prophet "
and in the words of Jesus" and i say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another,commits adultery ; and whoever married her who is divorced commits adultery." moses because of the hardness of you hearts permitted you to put away your wives but from the beginning it was not so.for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the TWO shall be ONE so then they are no longer two but have become ONE flesh.What GOD has joined let no man separate"
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In regards to your husband, If he married you only to have children then obviously you married the wrong guy because his heart was never yours in the first place.women are not cattle but human beings with feelings just the same.
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In regards to the practice of leaving your spouse when it is expedient, he who leaves his wife for such a silly reason is a fool and an infidel for how can he honestly state that he is a faithful Muslim if he can't even be faithful to his newly wed wife.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ In regards to a second wife, You would be a fool to condone such a selfish act for if his heart is not with you now then it surely won't be with you after another wife
and i can assure you that he won't stop having intercourse with you even though he disregards you for not having children. The Truth is maybe it is he that can't have children and he wants to play the part of a child by not being man enough to do the right thing by being faithful to his wife.a women deserves the full attention of her husband and not to have it given to another women only to be considered to be a lesser and a second sexual toy at his convience.
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i am no muslim but that doesn't mean that i have no knowledge of things. May Jesus give you understanding as to who he really is --The messiah who died for your sins because there is a God who wants to intimately know you and converse with you without you justifying your selves with performance but of course that is not what you want to hear but then again good advice is not always easy !!!Take care and i hope that all works out for the best.
2007-12-27 13:09:18 · answer #9 · answered by xenicintelligence 3 · 3⤊ 6⤋
Adopt!
2007-12-27 13:38:30 · answer #10 · answered by Big Bill 7 · 5⤊ 2⤋