This is giving me a major complex. It makes me feel very unattractive. My boyfriend says that is normal for men. Men out there, is this true?
2007-12-27 02:34:10 · 26 answers · asked by woman.in.red 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's not a 'need' it's a desire, and harmless unless he'd rather look at porn than spend time with you.
Males are very visual creatures and very sexual ones (in general). Men watching porn is no different than women reading erotic novels with steamy sex scenes.
No reason for you to feel the least bit insecure or get a "complex". Porn doesn't have anything to do with you...it doesn't mean he'd rather have the porn chicks than you, it doesn't mean you aren't enough for him in bed, or that he's thinking of straying or anything else...all it means is he likes to watch sex and think about sex, and you aren't available for that during all the times he would like to do that.
It's QUITE normal. Not all men do it, but plenty do...and a fair number of women do too. ☺
2007-12-27 02:39:06 · answer #1 · answered by . 7 · 5⤊ 1⤋
You need to be secure with yourself. Porn has nothing to do with the fact that you feel unattractive. If its not obsessive and he still wants you sexually and emotionally then be happy. There is nothing wrong with porn movies or internet porn unless its weird crap. I check out some of the internet stuff and it was a little morbid although I would never pay for internet porn so it was the free crap. If the real question you have here is about your relationship then my answer is, "if you have to ask, you already know the answer."
2007-12-27 10:50:04 · answer #2 · answered by snickernikki727 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wow...this is a great but very complex question.....
ask yourself
since im in a serious committed relationship and i allow my partner to watch porn...what are the chances i have of my partner being unfaithful if a girl comes into his life who looks like the stars in the videos and offers herself to him!!!!
You trust him right... i mean really when he's alone he's only lusting after other women right.... to appease his ever growing appatite ..... hmmm.... does he stare at other ladies when your out in public..... talk about your "problem areas" he wants you to fix....
Trust me if you dont get control of the situation and allow him to not show restraint and control then you will have an even bigger problem and possible heart break later on....
2007-12-27 14:00:54 · answer #3 · answered by King J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looking at porn? Not normal at all. But men do like to look at women -- we're wired to be visual creatures. The thing about porn is that those women don't object to being looked at. They don't turn off the lights on us, nor do they confront us for looking.
You need to tell your bf how this makes you feel. If he loves you, he should respect your feelings. That said, how are you in the letting him look at you department? Do you turn off the lights during sex? If so, that's a good habit to break. He wants to look at you, not just the hotties on the 'net, but you've got to let him.
2007-12-27 10:40:16 · answer #4 · answered by D'archangel 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Its not really a big deal to be honest. I think its a bit pathetic if they need to look at it everyday but once in a while is not a problem. Everyone needs fantasies. The male brain needs images for these fantasies, whereas a girl is more likely to be satisfied by reading a sexy story or something a bit more subtle like the gardener in Desperate Housewives or something. Fantasy is everywhere and if we are all honest we all do it.
I dont find porn erotic myself, but you should be thankful. My boyfriend is bi and his favourite porn is man-on-man! Lolz.
2007-12-27 10:42:19 · answer #5 · answered by munchkin 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
There is nothing wrong with porn as long as you still have a healthy relationship. Try watching it together, you might be surprised. There is actually porn geared for women (it has a plot). Do you watch romance movies or read romance novels? You are getting your fantasies fulfilled and that is his way of getting his fantasies fulfilled.
2007-12-27 10:40:57 · answer #6 · answered by Storm 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I honestly don't understand why anyone has a problem with porn. Loving you and watching porn are two different things. Porn stars do things you'd never imagine your girlfriend doing. Nor would you want her too. It's a guy thing. Pornography isn't real, it's a fantasy. It's makeup, beauty lenses, hair extensions, camera angles, lighting and silicone! Nothing wrong with it in general. I don't understand why some folks have a problem with it.
2007-12-27 10:37:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 1⤋
yeah , and its not because your not attractive or something like that , men are just that way they find the need to uhm help themselfs i mean you have sex all the time and stuff so i guess they do it by themselfs not to bother you and porn helps , but i see what you mean about getting a major complex i used to get it but then i realized its just like taking kids to the zoo they love to watch it but not for long so yeah dont worry to much about it !
2007-12-27 10:39:23 · answer #8 · answered by Malia 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't look at it that way. He is just getting ideas and energy for YOU!! Men are natural Voyers, we like to watch. Women are natural exibitionists. Try Stripping for him, or maybe let him photo or film the two of you together. Making one of the two of you might just turn his head away from the computer and back onto your body.
2007-12-27 10:39:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I don't understand either.....my man lied to me about that and said "Why would I need that if I have you, the most beautiful girl in the world" and yet I've caught him more than 5 different times at like 4 am, how do you think that made me feel.
2007-12-27 10:40:21 · answer #10 · answered by ♥Princess84♥ 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋