son doesn't talk.... is something wrong?

Question

My 19 month old son doesn't talk at all... He grunts, babbles, and whines.... I know that he can say some things, like "hi" "bye" "kitty" and "inca" (the name of one of our cats), and watching Dora one day he said "swiper", but I can't really get him to use them. He doesn't even try to use them... usually to say bye bye he waves and says muh muh.... he's smart, he understands things perfectly, and his hearing is just fine.... is there a reason he won't talk? He points to things that he wants, and tries to communicate... could it be because he isn't really around other kids his age? We're thinking about putting him in day care for a couple days a week, to socialize him a little more... we just moved to a new state and we don't have a doctor here yet, so I can't ask them.... anyone else have a similar problem? Like I said, he knows words, he just won't use them. He also doesn't associate "mama" or "dada" with us, just uses them as babble.... and we work with him all the time.

developmentally, he is not behind on anything else except the talking.... I didn't worry for a while, because he was still able to communicate... but we saw my in-laws for Christmas, and there were kids his age (within a couple of months) using 20 + words and forming 2-3 word sentences... "All done" or "I want down" and it made me wonder if something is going on with my son.

Please, no rude responses!

we just moved to this state, he doesn't have a doctor yet. His insurance should go through within two weeks, and we will be given a list of doctors that accept our insurance. Until then, we can't take him to the doctor.

just because it's been brought up, he's had his hearing checked twice (because he failed the hearing test at the hospital in one ear, they did a follow up), and his hearing is just fine. He turns his head when you talk to him, and he hears things we do when we are trying to be silent (such as opening the front door because then he will want to leave).... he can hear us pick up the car keys no matter how quietly we pick them up. He can definitely hear.

Answer 1

Our son was the same way.
Let me guess, you know exactly how to interpret these sounds right? And no one else does? He doesn't need to talk in that case, you know what he means so there is no incentive to improve.
The fact that he has some words and picks up new ones shows he's not slow. Just a little lazy.
Here is a trick; take his favorite treat or snack and put it in a see through container with a tight fitting lid. Tell him that he must say "please" for you to open it. Or tell you the name of the treat. This next part is hard but do it. If he doesn't, then put the treat back in the cupboard and try again in an hour or two. Maybe even the next day.
Trust me, he'll learn quickly enough.
(our speech therapist gave us this trick and it works like a charm!)
Good luck to you.

Edit; "Until then, we can't take him to the doctor." This is something I cannot and will never understand. We live in Canada you see, where healthcare is universal and paid by the people through taxes. We've never had to wait to provide our children with necessarry medical help. I cannot imagine what it must be like for a parent to have to withold medical aid for their child. And I hope I never will either.

Answer 2

Oh my gosh.. relax... LOL

Trust me on this one.. I was worred about my son at this age.. in fact I was so worried I had him tested and was told there that a lot of mothers worry around this age but rarely is their a speech delay...

So, be patient and enjoy it now... lol... by time he is 2 1/2 - 3 - you will not be able to shut him up... he is still grasping language and communicating... and once he gets it --- there will be no stopping him...

Also, daycare will help -- he'll be a little sicker (colds, etc) for a bit - maybe up to a whole year... but his immunity, social skills, and speech -- all will be enhanced by the interaction with other kids... but if you opt not to send him - he will still be fine.. more than fine...

When my kids were younger, I always remembered one peice of adivce that has helped me keep my sanity throughout worrying during parenting...I was told "this- like all other phases of dvelopment, is just temporary" (eg you will not see a college graduate in diapers, or not talking etc..

So, enjoy it... as best you can and don't worry when things are not where everyone thinks they should be..

Answer 3

My son, a second child, was like that. He didn't talk til he was about 2 1/2. the reason, he was too lazy and was getting all he needed by pointing. some kids are like that. He is now 15 and exceptionally bright. He has taken his science gcse's 2 years early and overtook his peers by year 5. When he did start talking he was very fluent and actually spoke better than other children at his nursery with a much more extensive vocabulary. The important thing is not how many words a child can say but how many they store. Give it a few months, he will surprise you when you are not expecting it.

Answer 4

I would take him to a speech pathologist to make sure nothing really serious is wrong however, to be honest, from what you described, he does sound okay. Even though he isn't speaking much, from what you described with him pointing to objects and indicating his needs, his language skills are intact. He knows what things mean--he is just not verbalizing those things. If by 24 months or two years, he isn't speaking more, then I would be really concerned. Definitely socializing him more would help him in more ways than one, so that is a good idea.

On a personal note, my husband told me when he was very young, he didn't speak until he was more than 2 years old. The reason? Everyone would respond to him pointing and gesturing to what he wanted so he had no need to talk. His parents were instructed to not respond until he said what he wanted. His verbal skills exploded after that. I wonder if you are facing a similar issue. Nevertheless, take him to a speech pathologist to make sure it isn't something more serious and for your peace of mind.

EDIT: If his insurance doesn't kick in until a couple more weeks, that's fine. This is not an emergency issue that needs to be checked out immediately. Two more weeks isn't going to make much of a difference, and who knows? He might be talking more by then.

Answer 5

Since he is developmentally where he should be in everything else I wouldn't be too upset. Children all develop differently. I think putting him in day care a couple days a week would be a big help to him. If he does not start saying more by the age of 2, then maybe a speech therapist may be helpful.

Answer 6

It's normal--doctors don't worry about kids not speaking until they've hit the 2-2.5 yr mark. He says a few words, it doesn't matter if he "uses" them if he knows them and says them on his own. It would be good to get him with other kids--either at a daycare or even just a playgroup in your neighborhood. He has just had a major stress placed on his young life--moving can be stressful to kids who don't fully understand the process. Give it some time, and before you know it he won't stop talking!

Answer 7

Boys mature and grow much slower than girls. He is fine. However, school will help as they will make him talk to get what he wants. You undrstand grunts, groans etc and probably just get all for him. Also, Dora at 19 months is not really good. PBS shows and all educational shows, at his age approx 30 minutes day. He needs visual stimuli and people talk ing playing,etc. Books, toys. Get him in a play group. Go to church, out him in church nursery during service, get him around other children. When he wants his cup and he points, hold it say CUP, and tell him to say. Do it over and over for all items. He will start to speak faster.

By the time he is 3 he will be on roll.

Answer 8

I worried about my son not talking, and I saw other kids his age or a little older talking, and my dad told me that i need to get him checked out! My husband has a son, (same age as mine), and he has a speech problem, but soon as they took my stepson to the doctor and they suggested a speech therapist ( my son starting talking)! so what I believe is that, he will talk in his own due time, don't compare your child to other children, because those other children are probably around more kids, and your child is still young, and it takes longer for little boys to do alot of things! Don't worry yourself about it, because I believe when you least expect it, he will be talking your ears off, and if he still seems to not really talk, take him to a specialist, he may need help, but like I said, i believe he will be just fine! Give him time! Good Luck!!!

Answer 9

One of my sons was born with the cord around his neck and he came out as purple as a Smurf. He was late in crawling, walking, potty training and at 2 years old, didn't say much. When riding in the car, he'd stare out the window into space not saying anything. We had him tested and after a whole battery of tests, they told us he was mentally retarded with an IQ in the 70's. They also talked about the difficulties we would face raising a child who was brain damaged from lack of oxygen at birth.

The wife was devastated but I told her that was all a bunch of hooey. I knew a retarded kid couldn't set in the floor of the shop screwing nuts on bolts, something his older brother had difficulty doing.

Well guess what? There wasn't a thing wrong with him, he just took his time. When he did start talking, he said that when he was staring into space, he was thinking! Now 16, he's still a thinker with a lot of common sense. Add to that mechanical ability, musical talent, mathmatical skills, has good people skills and so on. I'd love to introduce him to the people who deemed him retarded.

I guess our RETARDED boy outgrew it! Actually it's quite simple: every child is going to progress at their own rate. The problem is that mothers and grandparents are especially competitive when it comes to comparing kids. It's always a race over who was potty trained first, who talked first, which toddler can play the slide trombone first, who drove a semi at 3 years and so on.

I'm sure no expert, but your son is only 19 months old, so give him a chance. In addition, sometimes the parents or siblings contribute to the problem by being able to interpret grunts into wanting a cookie, a toy and so on and the kid has no need to talk. If this is the case, start helping him use words for things he wants, like a cookie. It's easier to get results when they're wanting something than it is to teach them to recite the Preamble to the Constitution, something they could care less about. Good luck, relax for now and give the boy some time. If my retarded Smurf boy could grow out of it, I'm sure yours can too!

Answer 10

yeah we as normal people 1. dont really know ur son personally and can diagnose him 2. A pediactric doctor and even a neurologist can help u better and they will be able to tell if he in the right developmental path or not. Some kids are just fast developers and other are slow. But sometimes there can be something wrong with the speech part of the brain n it requires immidiate action of ur part. Look through the yellow pages or even take him to the hospital...and find a doctor that accomodates to u in order to find out if theres something wrong with ur son. Good luck