family treats me like I am invisible again even though I nearly died a month ago and I want them to care but no they will not for if they did they would have called me and seen how I was when I was in hospital etc.
I may go-- maybe in error --but want to not let them upset me like I usually do,..how can I anticipate and head off their hurtful behavior and no one giving a darn which is quite apparent to me or how can I let a tiny concern they might show for a second be enough and get out of their before I cry for the 8th Christmas in a row,,if I decided not to go, how could I not offend my sister and how could I get out of it. (that is a reasonable excuse)
2007-12-23 22:33:35 · 9 answers · asked by janie 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
this Christmas it will hurt worst as I am lucky to be here as I nearly just died a month ago and I am vulnerable right now to feeling noone cares more than usual..
(also minx if you see this, I answered you in the last question so please look OK?)
2007-12-23 22:34:16 · update #1
lippie..I guess I feel obligated to go as my mom's dying wish was for us to reconcile (she died recently) but noone tried and I was physically and verbally attacked by all 5 of the siblings during the dividing of assets quite unfairly..my sister admitted she took her anger out on me and displaced it..my brother asked me to go as his wife is going for the first time in 15 years after they treated her like dirt and he said if we don't go we will never be invited again..mostly it is because my grown sons will leave early and I am so depressed with all that is going on, I don;t want to just stay home..I have went there for over 50 years and now it will be really different if I stay home..I guess I am hoping maybe they will be nicer but they have not been..in fact, my sister has been really awful to me lately (but sometimes nice)..
2007-12-23 22:50:53 · update #2
brinzz--I don't know if they do care it is not that much and so much less than I would show that it seems very small to me..I guess I am "over nurturing" and rarely find that in others and so it seems lacking. But they are not that nice people really..maybe I should not go.
2007-12-23 22:52:24 · update #3
missingo..good point..very good point
2007-12-23 22:53:03 · update #4
finally decided last year I would never go again and told my mom who always put guilt trip on me..but then I guess I am wanting to tell them what happened to me as far as wreck and show them the pictures..but I am tired of crying..
2007-12-23 22:54:14 · update #5
If someone had offended me for seven years in a row, I think I'd change plans this year. You've got a new lease on life so have a great Christmas .....somewhere else!!!!!
2007-12-23 22:50:01 · answer #1 · answered by missingora 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you know the outcome, why put yourself up to be hurt again? Just because it is Christmas, does not mean you have to go, stay home invite a few friends over and enjoy your day. You don't have to have a excuse, when they ask why you aren't coming tell them flat out how rotten they treat you and your not going to be treated that way any more. If you go you are setting yourself up, so until you get some back bone, stay away.
2007-12-23 22:42:06 · answer #2 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just don't go, if they're going to treat you like that thumb them off. I consider family people whom care about me, not blood lines.
If your worried about offending your Sister and she knows about this, she'll understand, and if she doesn't throw her in with the bunch of them too.
I have a small 'family' my Mother, Father and Grandmother. While I do have a few uncles and aunts, they don't show their faces unless money is concerned.
2007-12-23 22:38:21 · answer #3 · answered by HL2k 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am not sure how you can immunizie yourself, but it really is not giving a f*** what they think and I care about you... i know that sounds creepy, but i really do, email me and i think i might be able to help you, i know where you are coming from...i just want more information before i start making assumptions
2007-12-23 22:39:08 · answer #4 · answered by Okami 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK that sounds like nothing I've heard ...because it's not a sound it's something written down ...it looks like a green window and some black dots ...yes i see now ..your problem it is very serious...i think the correct answer to your problems is...perhaps...if you would be so Cain as to meditate to the given issues illustrated above...
2007-12-23 22:40:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
After all you have been through I think you owe it to yourself not go around anyone, including family that make you feel bad. Good Luck to you and God Bless You.
2007-12-24 05:13:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My family is not close either. What I did is find friends that became like family to me. Now I enjoy my time with them.
2007-12-23 22:38:32 · answer #7 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
<3
Maybe they find it too hard to show you affection, cause theyre scared they will loose you again
Im SURE they care about you, you may be seeing it in the wrong way..
Hmm
Take care
2007-12-23 22:43:10 · answer #8 · answered by b 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your family everything you just said here...
2007-12-23 22:36:43 · answer #9 · answered by Miss M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋