OK, I and my bf have been together for two years. Every xmas day, in those two years, we always spent it at his mom's to have dinner and little party and such (his parents divorced but still are good friends). and every thanksgiving we spent it at his dad's. He always spent it that way before he is with me. On xmas, he goes with me and my parents to church in the morning. I was just thinking about celebrating xmas with him and my parents a whole day long on a trip or something, but I was worried that his mom would freak out and think that I steal her xmas thing with her son. My bf is fine, he is more than willing to do it, but i just dont want to make his mom sad and think that way. but i also think that if she freaks out and gets upset, it would be very selfish of her since my parents never really had a chance to have a good time together with both of us. what do you guys think?
2007-12-23 20:04:38 · 9 answers · asked by ViTheDuck 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The wonderful thing about people is you can't "make" them think anything they don't want to think...
So, if you and your boyfriend made the adult decision to spend the day somewhere besides at his mom's, you would be making your own personal choice, without a thought of "making" someone else think anything in particular.
If your boyfriend's mom gets freaked out and upset, remember that's how small children act. With any luck, she's a mature and dignified lady, who can enjoy christmas for its meaning, not for who happens to show up at her house.
take care and do what you'd like to... only live once, so might as well make your day nice for yourself.
2007-12-23 20:17:16 · answer #1 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Xmas is one day a year, you can not rearrange the day that Xmas falls on but you can a trip.
It is understandable if his mum is upset.
Even if she does not act it and appears to be pleased for you, i can guarantee that she will have feelings of disappointment to say the least.
Perhaps your boyfriend does find the idea of a trip appealing, or perhaps he is just saying that so as not to hurt your feelings, i don not know, but either way, i think that you should encourage him to spend Christmas day with his family and arrange the trip for another day.
Good luck in what ever you decide to do.
2007-12-24 04:13:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not alternate Christmas eve and Christmas day between his mother and your parents. Go to your parents Christmas Eve and to Church with them Christmas morning and then spend the day with his mother this year, and next year, just reverse it around. That would be the fair solution.
And who knows? Maybe his mother would like to attend church with you and your family and spend the day with them as well. As long as you play it fair, everybody should be happy.
2007-12-24 05:01:00 · answer #3 · answered by mrsmommaid 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Plan to spend Christmas Eve with her. Of course, this advice may be a bit too late, since today is Christmas Eve.
2007-12-24 04:09:59 · answer #4 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Why dont you go on the trip with your parents and his as well, so everyone gets to be with each other on christmas. Ta Da!
2007-12-24 04:41:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Plan your day trip with your parents for another day, why hurt his mother by not spending Christmas with her ? and no matter what she says it will hurt her.
2007-12-24 06:24:45 · answer #6 · answered by mom23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your a very sweet girl for one but have him ask his mom and figure it out she will say something and it shoudln't bother her to much as long as he spend christmas eve with her or something or maybe you coudl ask her im sure she woudl really like that
2007-12-24 04:12:24 · answer #7 · answered by Dustin D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not just invite them to dinner at his moms house.That way every one is happy.
2007-12-24 04:09:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
alternate years between parents. they are adults.
2007-12-24 04:13:12 · answer #9 · answered by Chaz Vegas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋