I really love her and i know she loves me too, but we always have to be hiding from everybody including her family, we made a big mistake, we had sex w/out protection and she got pregnant, she was really scared she told her aunt, what was going on between us and that she was pregnant. Her sister asked her have an abortion i ask her to marry me she aborted the baby that's when we split and after 2 yrs we met again she told me she was sorry, she said that she regrets what she did she also show me that she still loves me but still can't be with me. I thought about what is going on with us and i really love her. We met a few other time and we agree not to see each other anymore for a long time. to see if what we feel is real love she said she might marry me in 5 or 6 yrs when we're ready but until then she told me to live my life normally and if i find somebody else she wants me to be happy, also she ask me to forgive her if she marries somebody else but i don't think she meant it.
2007-12-23 10:37:51 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Find somebody else. If she's ashamed of you because of your race, then she's not worth it.
2007-12-23 10:40:30 · answer #1 · answered by Glitteroid 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In the first place, you have forever ruined youself with this girl's parents by participating in premarital sex with her.
Arab people are very difference from Americans in this respect. They probably feel you have "defiled" their daughter, and have forbidden her to have anything to do with you. She has probably had a whole ton of grief from her family because of her relationship with you. The Arab culture is not the same as ours and children have different relationships with their parents than we do here.
Arabs -Muslims - however far they may be removed from their native countries, have very-deeply held feelings about relationships between men and women.
Haven't you read the news lately? Women in some Arab countries are still, to this day, stoned in a public place for even talking to a man! Their punishments are swift, unforgiving, and permanent. Their brothers consider that a woman who has had premarital sex to be a disgrace to the family, and "honor killings" like this are COMMON and hardly prosecuted at all.
Youve got to write this off to experience, and she is telling you the same thing. You're not going to overcome the forces that are working against you and this relationship.
Say goodbye forever and get on with your life.
Good luck.
2007-12-23 18:55:53 · answer #2 · answered by jasper addleton 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is right; Also consider that if you marry into this, you are really taking on the family as well. Arab men don't easily fold to their daughters spouse. They are always in charge of the family. The fact that she did this to her baby under the advice of her sister; well, pretty much tells you how they work. Sorry, but for both of your sakes, you probably should move on. Unless your both gonna stay away from each others families.
2007-12-23 18:43:43 · answer #3 · answered by Michael 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its very difficult, particularly if its the male thats not arab. i was married to an arab for many years and it was difficult for his family to accept he married an english girl, although they did, but u have to be very strong to go against yr family in that culture, particularly girls as they are not usuallly independent and dont want to incur the wrath of their family. i wonder why if she was prepared to risk getting pregnant she was not prepared to tell her family about u. it may be that she will hve an arranged marriage lined up. hopefuly if she loves u as much as it would appear she will tel l her famly about u and they will accept u. good luck.
2007-12-23 18:53:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just let her go. Life can be cruel sometimes. There are a lot of people in this circumstance. Maybe not so much in the U.S., but this does happen. Your relationship has ended. You need to just move on.
2007-12-23 18:55:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She loves you, I'm sorry but she will not go against the wishes of her family - it's been hammered into her from her birth that family comes first. Unless she agrees to marry you tomorrow move on.
Find another girl.
2007-12-23 18:40:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
listen buddy
girls from traditional families are very hard to put up with, meaning their families.
Even if you do marry her, you'll still have problems later on. You best leaving her to her own kind
2007-12-23 18:46:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is not her not wanting to marry you,its her family.I feel bad for her because i know parents can stick to old culture and
impose it on their kids.
Be even closer to her and try to understand her culture a bit
more.If she loves you then dont leave her.stick with her and
things will work out.she deserves your support and understanding.
2007-12-23 18:45:53 · answer #8 · answered by londoner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, she's crazy because I have seen many arabs marry black, hispanic, white guys.
race shud not be an issue if you truly love one another.
2007-12-23 19:10:20 · answer #9 · answered by love with your heart and mind. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should probably let it go. Unless you can get away from her family, you probably have no peace.
2007-12-23 18:43:30 · answer #10 · answered by hamrrfan 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋