wot she going through
2007-12-23 09:59:42 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
I lost my dad to lung cancer on 4th May this year.....
The day my sister told me he had lung cancer was THE worst day of my life... I was uncontrollable, it was though someone had told me he had died! Hearing the word Cancer and dad in the same sentence was devastating...I'm no medical person but i knew lung cancer was one of the worst cancers to have..... My sister told me i mustn't be crying when i go see him ..i had to be strong for him etc etc... I didnt think i would be able to do it.... but i did manage to do it I dont know how... i think i just put myself and everyone else out of my mind and just thought of my dad and of what he was going through right then.
Over the next weeks i saw my dad everyday, took him to hospital visits... found him positive feedback on the internet..even though i was reading all the negative too...which was heartbreaking.... I never lost hope i always thought we could receive a miracle... i prayed everynight.... Dad had more down days than he had up days especially after starting chemo... that was hard to see, he didnt have severe physical pain but the torture that disease put his mind through was torture for me to see.... he knew it was terminal but he came to accept that... he then really started to fight ...but unfortunately he was at a disadvantage ...the cancer had gotton a good head start .... he passed away 8 weeks after his diagnosis. That day was The 2nd worst day of my life... his torture had gone...but so had my dad... and now i didnt have to be strong for him....but my world fell apart that day...and i have not felt 'whole' since....Grief is very hard to handle some good days more bad days.... most of my family thought i was the stronger one of my sis and I .....but yet i'm the one still in a mess with this. I have pics of my dad that i still cant look at without my heart sinking and breaking.
I'm sorry for you if you are going through this or if its someone you know as it isnt a good place to be.
2007-12-23 16:33:06 · answer #1 · answered by ♥Honesty ♥.•´ `*.¸ ♥ 7 · 7⤊ 0⤋
like the first girl said you just want to see the suffering end. it all depends on how close you are too your father, i mean if you don't have a relationship with him and don't speak to him often I'm sure you will feel bad but it wont affect you if it's like a father you live with and have there all the time.
i haven't lost a father but I lost an uncle, and we weren't close, but when he was diagnosed, I was the only one who was there for him, besides his wife... it was my dad's brother but my dad I don't think gave a crap. it was horrible i talked to him every day because his wife had to work 2 jobs to compensate the income. He just got worse and worse. and it was very very hard to lose him. I was close when we i was little like 4-5 then he moved to florida... i talked to him on the phone, thru the internet, saw him on his webcam. I was the only thing he really had as he was dying, and it was aweful. i still am in contact with his wife, and even though I never met her, I was there for her, and i went to go visit her on my last trip to the states... it's very hard, and it still upsets me randomly without warning. I remember him saying he wished my dad would just sit back and enjoy a sun set, and stop sitting in a bar, because you don't miss things until your forced to face the fact you might not see it tomorrow......
it has changed a lot of the pace of my life. i will watch the sunset, or take a walk and really appreciate my surroundings as tomorrow may never come..... it's a kick in stomach, and you definitely appreciate things a whole lot more. he was still so happy in his final days, just drinking a beer outside on his swing set, talking about how beautiful his garden was... it's sad... i have to stop writing about this.....
i'm sorry if you are going thru this it's very very hard.
2007-12-23 19:12:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 1⤋
It's hard. Surround yourself with people who care about you. It should be okay to cry when you want to. Talk about what it means to you losing your dad and what you will miss. It is through this process of grieving that you feel a little better each day. It will take quite a while to feel somewhat normal.
2007-12-24 09:57:00 · answer #3 · answered by Simmi 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
My dad was diagnosed with cancer in 2000. In September of this year, we learned that it has spread throughout his entire body (bones, liver, throat, etc.). He is in his last weeks and we have called in Hospice. It is very difficult to lose my father, but I have gotten to the point where I just want to see his suffering end.
2007-12-23 18:26:45 · answer #4 · answered by Skittles are M & M wannabees 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋