Boyfriend and I were discussing the upcoming wedding of a mutual friend. (I'm going to be one of her bridesmaids). I was telling him how wedding clothes run smaller then regular clothes (ie: friend wears about a size four in regular clothes, but almost a size eight in wedding dress).
He asked what size I wear in regular clothes (size 14) but I wouldn't tell him.
So he goes, "That's okay baby, just subtract about four sizes from it and plan on getting your wedding dress in that size".
I felt insulted and said, "Why don't YOU plan on gaining four suit sizes for your tuxedo" and he told me, "We both know my body is more than adequate and its' going to just get better over time. Stop trying to make me feel inadequate".
2007-12-23 07:19:51 · 46 answers · asked by Original_Syn 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Should I feel bad? Because I do. I feel really fat and ugly now.
2007-12-23 07:20:15 · update #1
That was insulting, rude and a horrible thing to say - I'd think twice about marrying the guy...you just found a side of him that isn't very attractive.
2007-12-23 07:24:12 · answer #1 · answered by allrightythen 7 · 11⤊ 0⤋
Weight Watchers additionally worked great for me. What i like approximately that's which you're actually not "weight-reduction plan". If i want chocolate cake for breakfast i could have it....i merely can not have lunch because of the fact i'm out of factors lol. Pair that with a healthy regime of cardio and weight lifting and the load ought to come off.....I completely comprehend the place you're coming from! They placed me on steroids for like 3 years for my well being and it completely tousled my weight. For my cardio I play Dance, Dance, Revolution. that's a activity so much less like a exercising consultation to me. as some distance because of the fact the dress i could purchase it as quickly as you detect the only. or you have a great probability that this is going to likely be discontinued. purchase the dress in the size you're on the time, then a pair of month or 2 until eventually now the marriage (looking on how busy your seamstress is) do an rather final setting up and any differences. i could additionally reccomend a corset style back, they're greater forgiving than the zipper style. In a month or 2 your weight shouldn't exchange too drastically until eventually you're dropping at an rather undesirable cost. (2-3lbs a week is what medical doctors reccomend)
2016-10-02 06:56:38 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And you're with him because...? Dump him now! Don't marry him and don't date him. He's rude, mean, degrading and just awful for saying that sort of thing. He doesn't love you the way you are or he wouldn't have said that. If he's like this now then what's he going to be like if you ever get pregnant and gain all that baby weight which is hard to lose? How will you deal with that? He should make you feel like the most beautiful and cherished person in the world. Obviously he doesn't even cherish you a little by saying things like this. If I were you I would call him and ask to meet with him today and break up with him right there. He doesn't love you. He doesn't respect you. He is a jerk and you can do better!
2007-12-23 07:33:45 · answer #3 · answered by Rockit 6 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Wow what a nice jerk he is lol He has no right to "suggest" that you lose four dress sizes before your wedding! I take it that you two aren't even engaged since you refer to him as your bf and not your fiance. He is being so insensitive and immature. If you are comfortable with your size then that's all that matters. Oh and give me a break that his body is adequate. He is trying to turn this back around on you to make it sound like you are the one being unreasonable when it is clear that he is the prtty one. Sounds like a selfish jerk that is trying to control you by telling you to lose weight and trying to hide it by saying I would seriously think really hard about ever marrying a guy like this.
2007-12-23 11:28:23 · answer #4 · answered by Wishing on a Dream 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I so sorry for u i would totally feel insulted i mean im not fat i think your fine size 14 thats good by boyfriend told me im so skinny i need to eat more. My size is 8.....I know Sad . WEll if he doesnt exept u for who u are then leave him thats just not right i left my boyfriend for telling me that and then after a month he told me he was really sorry and wasnt thinking on what he said so were back together............................ and i can see that your boyfriend is the same........leave him he will come runnig back 2 u. I can tell that your size is awsome 14. i wish i was like that. Your not fat or ugly if he can't exept for who u are then well to bad for him. but if u ever fell sad or can't talk to anyone im here everysingle day on Yahoo Answers. So just talk to me If u want. But Dont let him make u feel bad. Thats not right. I hope everything works out..
Ps your perfect and don't let him make you think that you are fat. Bye
2007-12-23 12:27:22 · answer #5 · answered by Love You so much! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is so rude I don't think that i would put up with something like that even from someone I had been with for a long time . Size 14 isn't that big as a matter of a fact it is probbaly average. I would tell him that the only weight you will be lossing will be him. tell him that he thinks he is so adequate that he should reevaluate. If he takes how big he thinks he is (you know what) and subtracts about 4 inches thats about right. Ps. Dump the losser that is mental abuse
2007-12-23 07:43:16 · answer #6 · answered by Passionate C 2 · 6⤊ 0⤋
I'd suggest he go solo - and you do the same. He doesn't sound like he needs a date anyway - I'm surprised there's enough room for you and his ego!
Lady - you deserve much better than that. Give the shallow creep the boot, and find someone that loves the size 14 you!!!! Beauty isn't in the tag on the clothes, it's in the heart and in the mind - obviously, your b'f is very ugly inside. That'll shine through.
2007-12-23 18:07:12 · answer #7 · answered by Fluff S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie, "bob w" has hit the nail right on the head! listen to him!
personally i don't think a 14 is big - of course maybe sizes differ in different countries - and whether its big or small or just about perfect isn't the point - the point is you allowed him to make you feel less than what you are!
i think perhaps its time for a heart to heart and if your size is that important to him then he isn't the right man for you!
my sister married a man who is all about 'looks', not for himself, he figures he is great looking even with a gut that walks through the door way before the rest of him does..........he is always on her back about her weight, her size, her smile, her hair, everything. initially it was just the odd comment about 'try your hair this way' or 'perhaps that isn't your colour'. since they've been married there isnt' a week goes by that he doesn't make some comment to her, and he does it in front of others as well as when they are alone. most of our friends know exactly what he thinks of his wife and it breaks our hearts to see her always being put down by him. he does it to the point that others seem to think they can make remarks to her as well, and he never stands up for her when they do. she is now so downtrodden that she won't or can't stand up for herself.
and it all started with a little comment just like the one you are asking about! i'd say find a new man sweetie - you are worth far more than he thinks!!!!!
2007-12-23 14:55:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, my fiance would be running for his life if he ever said something like that to me. That is so freaking rude! Being a size 14 does not mean you're fat. I wear between a 10 and a 12, and I am by no means fat. You should find someone who loves you for you, and won't try to change you.
2007-12-23 09:00:46 · answer #9 · answered by phatchick182004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you marrying this guy?
I'm a size 12 and I proudly tell my Fi that. I don't like being a 12 to the rest of the world and I'd love to lose weight. But, he never makes me feel less. I'm not ashamed about my weight in front of him. When the rest of the world tells me I'm fat, he tells me I'm beautiful.
You'll lose weight, if YOU WANT to, not if he does.
If he doesn't like that, show him where the door is and tell him to make sure it doesn't hit him in the a$$ on the way out.
2007-12-23 09:20:57 · answer #10 · answered by J'adore 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No, you shouldnt feel bad. Even if your mate feels you might not be at your physical prime... its not his place to say anything (unless its unhealthy... in which case some tact should be in order).
Maybe he didnt mean it like that. Sit him down (sooner rather than later, theres a possibilty he doesnt even remember saying it by now) and ask him if he really feels that way. If he says yes, explain that its a really hurtful thing to say, and hes upset you. Love knows no shape or size. If he feels that way for real, i would reconsider marrying someone who doesnt think im beautiful just the way i am.
2007-12-23 10:39:04 · answer #11 · answered by loki_only1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋