okay so i dated this boy jimmy for 2 years, he wasnt really a good bf at allhis friends were always more important and he never had time for me...he never took me out, i always had to take him out and pay for all th dates, he ignored me and did w/e he felt like and didnt appreciate me, i begged him to change but he wouldnt so i had to end it...he was my first love and i loved him unconditionally and put up with alot of things i shouldnt have because im too nice...after we broke up i tried to date other people i just couldnt bring myself to do it..me and jimmy still talked several times a week...then i started ignorin his calls cuz how am i supposed to get over him if i talk to him still right? so i did and started talkin to my bosses little cousin & now we are datin, he just asked me out 3 days ago.but now my ex wants to change and be diferent, it sounds so convincing&i still love him but dont wanna hurt my new bf because hes treated me like gold.idk what to do,shuld i go back to jimmy
2007-12-23 04:55:16 · 26 answers · asked by Brooke J 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Listen Girl......don't give him another chance......Please don't
Be that girl that is strong...be with the new good guy....don't let him go for someone that didn't really love you back...
I hope you make the right move....It's about growing up...
When you change from a girl...into ...a woman...is when you are faced with a decision and make a logical choice to do the right thing because you are not a young girl that buys into lies.
I feel like you are ready to make that transition in life...
It's just a part of growing up.......and if you do this right...You'll see how good it feels to be incharge of your own life....as a woman.
Being a woman is a very powerful move in our lives....
I believe in you!
Tell old boyfriend that you have had your past together and that you think it's better just to leave your past together in the past.....and good luck!
Then have a Merry Christmas! And bring in the New year......not as a girl anymore...........but as a woman!
2007-12-23 05:07:18 · answer #1 · answered by Candlelights 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He may change but only if he has a reason. He doesn't have a reason he just is being selfish wanting you back then will see how far he can push you this time.
To change he has to have a life changing experience or see the error of his ways.
Think about people you have known over long periods and how much they are like who they were and how many made real changes.
Most people I have known over 20-40 years are about the same as they were. Skinny ones stayed thin maybe gaining a little, fat ones dieted and lost and regained but most are still heavy. Thrifty ones still are and spendthrifts still spending.
Some might change after a heart attack or when they get scared of a retirement in poverty but most are about the same.
You ex boyfriend is a selfish young man, what will make him change? He isn't unselfish or much older he just wants something he can't have.
2007-12-23 12:57:51 · answer #2 · answered by shipwreck 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
People certainly can and do change, but i don't think he has.
When someone says they will cahnge in order to please you, even if they do, it is usually quite short lived... like long enough to get you back. And any change that you may be lucky enough to actually see will likely not be a heartfelt one and isn't that what you want? A guy who treats you well because he WANTS to, or because he thinks it will make you happy enough to stay?
Nawww. Meet lots of people, the new guy included, before you get too hung up on one who has a not so good past record with you.
One saying is that future behavior is always predicted best by past behavior. He's already proved he can be a jerk with you, so give someone better a shot.
2007-12-23 13:03:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Men usually change for the worse. If he says he change, then he may resent you for changing.
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But you said you love him unconditionally. But you broke up with him BECAUSE he wouldn't change. That is NOT unconditional love. Just so you know. I'm not even saying that asking for change is a bad thing.
All I am saying is that breaking up BECAUSE he won't change is NOT unconditional love.
BTW: Nobody loves another unconditionally. Even mom's have a limit on how much they can love unconditionally.
Good Luck
P.S. There are so many people in the world. Why go back up that wrong avenue?
2007-12-23 12:59:41 · answer #4 · answered by Lover not a Fighter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take some advice guys only use that line when they want something. If he wasn't up to putting out a little effort last time what makes you think he will this time. I say stick with the new bf and get over jimmy. It'll work trust me.
2007-12-23 12:58:44 · answer #5 · answered by Maren 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may sound convincing but he needs to prove it. I understand that he was your first love but you were subjected to a lot of bull that shouldn't even have went on the way it did. Yes it is true that people change, but some people just get lonely and jealous. So maybe it's a fact that he doesn't want to be lonely, or he doesn't want to see you with someone else. Since he was your first love, i guess it's fair to say that you might want to see what could have been and what could be, but check him out first. Maybe he just has ulterior motives. And even thought he was your first love, don't settle for less and don't become blind.
2007-12-23 13:02:36 · answer #6 · answered by afro_rica_n_dian girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to made the decision. Do you still have feelings for ur ex? u still ove him? if u have been ignoring his fone calls for sometimes nad now ur with this new guy.jsut started..then dont spoil it okay. give ur new bf a chance okay. but if u still want Jimmy so badly then i guess u will have to tell ur new bf that u need some time...to think abt wuts goin o with u....always pray to God. Ask him to guide! coz When u ask HIm he will for sure!!
HOpe u make a good decision.
2007-12-23 13:02:38 · answer #7 · answered by Marki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do not take this guy back!!!! i had the same situation recently. loved this guy in high school. he went in the marine core (sp) and he found me twenty years later. it was wonderful but he only stuck around while i was working and paying for every thing. lost my job, he split. he showed up on my door step about two months ago. i took him back, thinking he was different, had changed with maturity. spent $600 during the first month, all my savings, and it was way worse. i had to file a protection order to get rid of this guy.
stay with the guy who treats you like a princess and leave this jerk for someone else to deal with.
they do not change!!! they just get older.
been there, done that
2007-12-23 13:09:04 · answer #8 · answered by kelley 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be a fool, Men never change! not b/c you ask them too anyway...If he's young he will mature a certain behaviors will change but the selfishness and bad personality traits never go away! Don't try to change him, or you'll be very disappointed. Try out the new guy...one nail knocks out the other!
2007-12-23 13:01:50 · answer #9 · answered by PreciosaB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get over him and stay with the dude that treats you like a human being, if he does change then he will change for good and show you that he really does want to be with you
2007-12-23 13:02:31 · answer #10 · answered by Sweetdevil69 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋