I feel extremely lonely?

Question

I feel like my friends have distanced themselves from me to the point where I have no one to talk to anymore. Most of the time I am extremely depressed where I either obsess on something I want to accomplish or not do anything because everything feels pointless to me. Sometimes I get into these depressed states where I want to kill myself because I see no point in my life anymore. I feel isolated from the world, have huge anxiety in front of people, my own relatives even, and don't know what to do about it anymore.

I see a psychiatrist, but I really haven't gotten to these issues that thourougly yet.

I don't really have a question I guess. I guess I just want to know how I can minimize the severity of my depression when it gets out of control sometimes.

Answer 1

You say you haven't gotten to these issues with your psychiatrist yet? To me, these are your most important issues. Call your psychiatrist now and tell him/her that you are having suicidal thoughts. You didn't mention whether or not you are on an antidepressant. If you are, it's not working and you need to try another one. If you aren't on one, you need to start on one now. Find someone to be with now--you don't need to be alone. Tell them how you are feeling. Good luck, and hang on.

Answer 2

Hi, there are some really good answers here. I think a key point is that you haven't realy got down to the deep issues with your psychiatrist. I think it's important that you ask him/her for a referral to a decent psychotherapist, preferably one who had knowledge of cognitive behavioural or rational emotive behavioural therapies.

One of the problems with being depressed is the tendency to withdraw from social contact, with the belief that no one really cares. Unfortunately, this then becomes something of a self-fulfilling prophecy, in that your friends may not bother with you so much because you aren't very sociable.

The other main feature of depression is the loss of relationship to the SELF. This is the most important relationship you will EVER have, and it's the one which most people abuse the most. We think we can get away with treating ourselves like shite, and this results in depression. Quite often this starts when others have been unkind to us in the past, and we continue to act towards ourselves as others have done. Now is the time to stop. Take whatever steps are necessary to become your own best friend, and then you will be in a position to go out and find yourself some decent friends outside of yourself.

Good luck, and all the best. You CAN do it!!

Answer 3

Is the psychiatrist giving you medication? Having medication can lessen your anxiety (I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder) I can feel your pain. Just try to put yourself in a simpler place and time. Relax your mind. Think of happy thoughts if possible. Sometimes people don't understand others with anxiety and just distance themselves. I'm sorry to hear about your friends. I hope you will open up to the doctor. Try and have a happy holiday. Your not alone. I wish you well!

Answer 4

It's more the suicidal thoughts you need to avoid.
Loneliness, lethargy, obsession, lack of esteem are all signs of depression, particularly at this time of year.
I'm in the same boat, only probably worse - I just won't bore you.
You can minimise the feelings by avoiding alcohol (which explains my huge mood swings as I go to extremes), getting exercise, eating well, and getting a lot of sunshine.
The latter is easier said than done, although light box therapy can help.
Also, try not to dwell on things and keep occupied.
It is hard - but not totally impossible to get through it.

Answer 5

Well, I certainly can't cure your problems but I've been there and here is what I have learned.

People don't like being around others that bring them down. Being depressed around your friends seems like it should be okay. After all, they are your friends and should be there for you, but in the end everyone is out to protect themselves above anyone else so when you are around your friends, "fake it till you make it". It can be exhausting sometimes, but putting a smile on your face, taking some deep breaths, maybe jumping around a bit to get your energy up will make a more pleasant person to be around while you around your friends.

It's really in the way you talk to yourself. Telling yourself negative things about yourself will make them true. You have to think positively. I know its sound corny, but it really does work.

Do something that makes you happy. I try to ski. I recently learned how to play guitar. I find that excersizing helps my mood. I try to read when I can and write in a journal. Turn on some music, lay in your bed, and force yourself to find things about yourself that you like and then voice them out loud. Talk to yourself in a reassuring manner. Maybe get a pet -- it's something to channel your love into.

My point is, you have to be your own best friend. You can to nurture yourself. You cannot allow yourself to be victim to life's circumstances you need to be proactive about taking control of your own path.

Oh, and watch "What the Bleep Do we Know". It changed my life.

Feel free to message me at debonairx on AIM or [e-mail] if you ever wanna chat.

Answer 6

I totally empathize with you. I've been going through the same for a bit now. Drop me an email if you need to let it out. Sometimes it helps me to just talk about it. It takes some of the power away.

Answer 7

i used to have severe depression, then I realized that life really is a gift. not to sound cliche, but i went from suicidal to realizing that it doesn't really matter how you spend life, but the whole thing can be a game depending on how you see it. you can do whatever you want, from deciding on a career to meeting someone at the bus stop.

basically, it might be pointless but really, what's the alternative? make the best of it while it's here for you.

Answer 8

well its all in ur mind.. remmber one thing. u came in this world alone (if u not twins) . then y u expect someone else for living this world? Never ever expect anything from anyone strangers or releatives. if u no one making u happy or not talking to u .. u give them happines. n to give others happines u have to be happy urself. see its like .give n take. u give happines they will return u in same manner. make new friends. dont sit for others tht they come n talk to u.. u take step. listen to songs when u feel bored. or alone. dance on sing. if u just do this u start liking everything around you. its not tht difficult. one more thing. never underestimate urself. if u dont like someone just dont care abt it. u cant change the world ...u can change urself. n nothing wrong in ur my friend :)
just enjoy ur life.
do thinking which u like. or which u like when others do. like playing guitar,keyboard, sketching, create new hobbies. discover ur hidden tallent.
Dont sit n feel bad.
feel good abt it. tht there is no one to disturb ur personal life. ur free to live ur life on ur own style dude cheer up :)
all the best :)

Answer 9

Aww, loneliness. To some its Heaven, to others hell. Its the Holidays playing with your emotions. Its better to be alone than walk around with a knife sticking out of your back. Your best friend is yourself. Be one with nature and endure the serenity it gives. Doctors and pills cant help you. You have to be strong willed and determined not to let life's up and downs get to you. You have to be strong. I wish you the best.

Answer 10

you can vent....(my e-mail address is below if you ever need someone to talk to...and believe me, i will listen, because i'm going through the same thing...)













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