Are there any mothers out there who had to circumcise their son's even though it was your wish not to?

Question

Are there any mothers who are being forced to circumcise your boy? Whether it be because the husband wants it done or it has to be done for medical reasons? My husband and I did not have our son circumcised at birth. We did not feel the procedure was necessary. My son is now 4 years old and we recently discovered that he has a condition that may inhibit the way his penis functions. The pediatricians suggested a circumcision will likely alleviate the condition. I really don't want my boy to be circumcised, yet I am worried for him in the future if it is not done. I am in a tough situation. What should I do? Any similar experiences?

Answer 1

All I can say is that you should be sure to get a second opinion on this. Some doctors still push unnecessary circumcision because they either think it's how it should be, or they are uncomfortable dealing with an intact penis. My son's doctor, when he was 8 months old, told us he had 'phimosis' and would need to be circ'ed. He was not infected, in pain, having any problems at all - the doctor just thought that, because he wasn't retracting yet (at 8 mos!), that it was a problem.

I found a new ped for him - one who understood the workings of an intact penis. And, I sent the old doctor information on the care of an intact penis, too, so that she could learn about it - apparently they skipped that information in doctor school... Last I heard, she had left pediatrics & gone into allergies - probably all for the best.

My son's almost 8 now - started retracting some time in his 4th year. No problems at all. Still intact :D Make sure you get a 2nd opinion on this.

Answer 2

I just answered your other question. I think you should seek second opinions and go to foreskin-aware urologists before you go ahead and do such horrible surgery at an age that would really traumatise him.

Yes, in some cases circumcision fixes the problem, but most often the problem either would have self-resolved, or there would have been much easier treatment. Doctors often opt for it as a first resort, instead of a last resort, either because they are lazy, because they are used to circumcised boys, or because they want more money.

Another thing is that unless he is going to have immediate and severe problems with penis function (presumably not, but you don't state the condition) you could possibly wait for treatment until he can consent and decide, around age 12 or so.

Answer 3

My sister and her husband did not circumcise their son at birth. Like you, he developed a condition that made it medically necessary for him to be circumcised. He was about 3-4 when the procedure was done. My sister wasn't thrilled to have to do it, but she was happy that her son was all better.

Same for my sister in law. They didn't circumcise their son, but had to when he was 9 months. He was having urinary problems, and they thought he would have to have a kidney transplant. Once they circumcised him, everything was resolved and he was fine.

I know it's not what you wanted, but if a relatively simple procedure can help your son, you should go with it, rather than face the consequences.

Neither my sister nor my sister in law has any regrets. Nor co they second guess their decision to not do it when their sons were born. The still support their initial decisions, but unfortunately, they had to circumcise anyway.

Answer 4

it would be better to do it now since you didn't do it shortly after birth. The longer you wait the more complex the whole thing gets and at his age he'll likely need general anesthesia. It is recommended that the procedure be done shorty after birth so the child has no recollection of it.

Answer 5

If the doctor is telling you to do it to alleviate the condition then do it. Why would you want him to suffer? You went to the doctor for medical advice, follow it. I had both of my boys done at birth.

Answer 6

i personally didnt want to and i didnt even thought my sons father wanted to. if it is a medical condition you should. its what is best for you son. hopefully they can numb they pain really really good for ur little guy.

Answer 7

My son had to be circumsized at 4 years old.I really didnt want to but he kept getting UTI's.After he had it done though he hasn't had a uti since

Answer 8

You should have got in done at birth, it would have saved your son a lot of pain. Yes do it! It is your son. It is his doctor telling you these things!