I'm 18 and My bf slaps and beats me... everytime he gets mad at me i dont know what i should do i'm afraid to break up with him cause then he will go hurt himself or worse kill himself... no body wants him he has no where to live... i just dont know what to do or i dont know where i should send him even if we break up??? please help and another thing he is the father of my child and i want her to have a daddy i just dont wanna be hit no more... i dont know what to do... and i try to talk to him about but he just says well you shouldnt have made me mad....
2007-12-21 10:17:38 · 29 answers · asked by chronic_42089 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
thats abuse. im soo sorry you have to go through that.nobody should go through something like that.
i dont kno wat to tell you tho. im sorry
2007-12-21 10:21:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, this one is a little tough, but let me break it down. First, no lady deserves to be hit for ANY reason. In that case, I would either call law enforcement or get a restraining order against him. Ok...next part. If he wants to be selfish and kill or hurt himself, he's not thinking about anyone's feelings in his mind besides his own. It's not your fault and your responsibility to stay with him because that's the way he is. Tell him where he can get help and if he continues his behavior without help, get the restraining order and then break up. If he has no place to live, most cities have a place that you can go to for financial help or even temporary shelters he can stay at. There's a solution to every problem but don't make the solution that you have to keep being his girlfriend. Be brave and do what's right for yourself. Good luck!
2016-05-25 08:35:39 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I grew up in a home that was unstable and chaotic. My mother said the same thing you did, that she wanted my dad around so us girls could have a father. That was a mistake! Allowing your child to be exposed to this abuse is a form of abuse. You're abusing your child by staying in this situation. You need to be worrying about the safety and livelihood of your child as well as your own. Forget his! If you stick around, you're showing your child that it is acceptable to take this from a man. It is unacceptable.
You ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS BEHAVIOR, in no way, shape or form regardless of what he tells you. He blames his actions and behavior on you because he is a coward. If it were your fault that he acted the way he did, then he would be nice when you want him to be. No matter what he does if you break up with him, is none of your responsibility. But you are putting your child and yourself in unnecessary danger by staying with this immature man. Please hear me. I know from very personal experience. He will break you down as much as he can to keep you where you are. Get out while you can! Or seek help at a shelter or with a family member. Somewhere. Get help.
2007-12-21 10:29:25 · answer #3 · answered by gogogadgetlonglegs 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are in a toxic and dangerous situation.
The sooner you realize he WILL NOT change and that both you and your child are in danger, the better!
You are only 18 and already have a child. Please use your head and ask for help NOW. Tell your family and friends about this, and get away immediately. It will be hard for you to be able to stand on your own, but you need to get away from this man ASAP.
If you think that he will change, you will waste a lot of time and energy. Abusive people NEVER change, and the abuse gets worse over time.
If you do not love and respect yourself first, how can you expect others to love and respect you?
2007-12-21 10:46:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well u should report this, its really an offence that he is doing this to u! If u dont then the beating will get even worse, there gotta be someone in your family that has told u this, or dont they know about the situation?
Well if there is a child involved here i still think that u go to the cops about this and report what has been happening.
Well keep safe
2007-12-21 10:24:14 · answer #5 · answered by Luke 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get some Peeper spray and if he gets crazy spray his face! and kick him a couple times for being a poor Excuse of a Man!
You don't deserve that and hes lower then a Worm!
Being a Biological father does not make him a Father...
a Real Father loves his Wife and Child and if he doesn't love you enough not to beat you then he is not a True Father..just sperm donor pretty much...
don't let him control you get some pepper spray first.. and tell him if he lays one more hand on you its over and that his going to jail and those are the terms...
and if he touches you its over forever.
p.s call all your brothers,uncles,cousins , Guy friends to help defend you...
2007-12-22 14:07:41 · answer #6 · answered by Neweyes777 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im srry but thats bull.. ur bf has no right to be hitting u everytime he gets mad. break up with him, but just stay completely away from him...get a restraining order or something. hell buy a gun even. no body deserves that kind of abuse, especially a woman. as for ur child, i know that u want her to have a father, but how would it look if she sees her father hitting her mother. that can really mess up a kid. u seem like a nice girl, and theres plenty other, nicer guys out there that can treat u way better.
2007-12-21 10:23:59 · answer #7 · answered by vicious_tfa 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not put up with that sweetheart, no guy should hit you for any reason. You get yourself away from him as far as possible, and dont worry bout what he is going to do with himself. You should put yourself first, nobody deserves that.. wether u make him mad or not. And you child is better off without a father, if the father will hit it and abuse it. Be strong and get away.. fast.
2007-12-21 10:23:34 · answer #8 · answered by bl0ndi_x0 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Leave him, Leave him! if he is that kind of guy, who knows what might happen to the baby, when its crying in the night non-stop. Nobody deserves that, and your child wont deserve that either. You want a father for your baby, but does your baby really want that type of father? If he has nowhere to live or if he feels bad once your gone, then he will realise how much he wants you, and may appreciate you more. Dont give in to how nice he can be. Dont let yourself be the victim of unnessescary violence.
2007-12-21 10:24:18 · answer #9 · answered by Luke 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
your situation is very difficult. i mean i can tell that you need him because of your child...but you shouldnt keep him becuase of his harrasments to you. i think it is better if you let him go. he will only hurt you even more. and even though your kid needs a father, not one that may even abuse him or her. she needs to be protected and you do to. u never know the worse stuff that he could do to you guys. it is safer is he isnt with you guys. maybe you should tell the police or the doctors so he can work his issue out. it is goign to be tough sending him awy, but it is for the safety of you and your child. i hope that i helped and i hope everyhting goes well. good luck!
2007-12-21 10:23:51 · answer #10 · answered by dreamer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really sad that you even have to ask this. You know the answer. Let him kill himself. It's all talk anyways. Would you rather he kill your or your child? Don't worry so much about him. He's not worth it.
2007-12-21 11:07:50 · answer #11 · answered by Shadow 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋