What should I do about this? I am Christian and my husband is muslim. he lied to his family and told them that I converted and didnt tell me until several months after he did this. now we have a son. I have no intention of converting and we also agree that we will raise our son being open to both faiths. my problem is, I dont want my son around his family now because its a big lie. i dont approve of my husband lying and though he thinks i should support him, i think he should tell them the truth. any advice?
2007-12-21 07:24:22 · 14 answers · asked by concerned 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Ah, yet another illustration of the problems caused by religion.
2007-12-21 07:30:53 · answer #1 · answered by Peter D 7 · 3⤊ 2⤋
The Islam faith, as you probably know, holds inter-faith marriages as a high priority. He obviously loves you enough to deceive his family though that was the wrong thing to do.
You say you don't want your son with his family because he lied and that now it seems as though they have a perception of you and maybe even your son that is completely fabricated. If this is the case, perhaps your husband AND you should approach them and explain to them that you are of a different faith. I cannot speak for them but you cannot continue to let them believe you are Muslim if you are not, especially if you want your son to be open to both sides of the equation (which I think is admirable).
They will find out eventually, it is better if you both do this together, despite it being his lie in the first place.
2007-12-21 15:33:19 · answer #2 · answered by Jared M 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can't get a divorce just cause things are not going your way. That's being selfish. But pray and pray and pray for him. God judges the heart. Pass the 10 commandment. God hates sin. He kicked Adam and Eve after they only sinned once. But we sin all the time, but society thinks it is ok. His wrath is building up. But to be forgiven, we need to turn (180 degrees) away from our sins (repent) and trust in Him fully. God is loving but still holy, and just also. You think a convicted felon would get off from the rape and murder charges cause the judge is understanding? No, the crime has been commited
Ask him why is he doing this. Sounds like he is doing this cause he has anger (Matthew 5:21-26)
Revelation 21:8
But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.”
Whether we believe in God or not, we will have to face on judgement day, He will get 100% of the credit/glory regardless what happens.
2007-12-21 16:27:58 · answer #3 · answered by healing4u2live 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should definitely talk to him about it. It's possible that he knew some good reasons to lie (i.e., there might be big repercussions between him and his family if he told them the truth), but if there are, you should at least know about them. Having him lie about that is definitely a serious issue, and although you shouldn't let it get in the way of your relationship, like I say you should at least talk to him about it.
>we also agree that we will raise our son being open to both faiths.
Well, here's hoping he turns out to be a healthy young atheist. ;)
2007-12-21 16:30:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are his family. Let him deal with them. Just point out that lies have a habit of surfacing no matter how many cement blocks you tie to them.
I hope his family are loving and tolerant enough not to reject your family. Maybe you should try sounding out the mother inlaw for her attitudes on this.
Either way, you guys need to discuss how to go along with your lives together even if his family turn out to be religious nutcases.
I had a cousin that got into the same problem over marrying a Irish Catholic girl. Some of her family refused to even attend the wedding.
2007-12-21 15:36:05 · answer #5 · answered by Buke 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure he is doing this to protect you (I'm not saying physically, but he probably knows the tolerance of his family). You are correct though in being concerned about this lie. You two have to sit down and come to common ground on this. It may or may not be easy, but the effort should be worth it in the long run. The alternative is being forced to build on this lie with more and more lies - not a good situation.
2007-12-21 15:50:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband lying to his family is his prerogative. If, however, he expects you to lie or your son to lie, it's a problem. So tell him to either confess the truth or don't be surprised when you do.
2007-12-21 15:29:48 · answer #7 · answered by Eleventy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He can tell them whatever he wants. It does not mean you have to support the lie. If they ever ask then tell them the truth.
2007-12-21 15:32:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think this is a really important issue in your marriage, the fact that he has to lie to his family in order to get them to accept you.
What else is he lying about, and to whom?
2007-12-21 15:31:14 · answer #9 · answered by fmckin1 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OOPS
sounds like an episode of Jerry Springer, lol.
good luck.
2007-12-21 15:29:12 · answer #10 · answered by Free Radical 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋