what should i do?
2007-12-21 03:27:41 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
tell him its okay and natural and have "the talk" with him. You should have done it long ago.
2007-12-21 03:35:48 · answer #1 · answered by rahkokwee 5 · 5⤊ 1⤋
"caught" him? is masturbating a crime? Is it something to be punsished? Like, "I caught my 13 year old son with a bag of weed"? No. A 13 year old masturbating is about as natural as a dog peeing on a fire hydrant. It should be an indicator for you that it may be time to have the dreaded "sex talk" with him. Ideally this should be done by his father, but an older man that he trusts or you will do in a pinch. Let him know that there is nothing to be ashamed of (unless he was doing it in the living room or something) and that our sexuality is a part of who we are. Then scare the **** out of him with talk about STD's and Teen pregnancy until he agrees that he won't even look at a woman until he's 37.
2007-12-21 03:39:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Ok so you caught him. It's probably been happening and is going to continue happening. He is more embarressed than you are. Look at this it this way. At least he was ALONE. It's normal. Just let it alone. Everyone has done it. If he is still upset about it you need to tell him that you are not angry with him. Being angry is the worst thing you can do (with the exception of laughing at him) and just tell him it's ok and it's normal, and everybody does it. Even Mom and Dad. Don't make him feel he is a bad person. If he feels he cannot talk to you, you will lose his trust forever.
2007-12-21 03:41:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
So, you caught your 13 year old son masturbating...so what?
2007-12-21 16:05:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This probably has an impact on both of you and both are probably embarrassed by it. Your reaction is going to be based on your values and what you want him to learn. It's important to first examine your own feelings about it and what you feel is proper conduct. Since you're both aware of what happened, sweeping it under the rug may make you both feel uneasy. "Clearing the air" may be difficult for both of you but in the long term may enhance both trust and communication.
If you walked in on him in the bathroom, simply excuse yourself and act like any other bathroom mistake. Then approach him later. If you walked in on him in his bedroom, you should also excuse yourself and promise to respect his privacy by knocking next time.
Then when you have a quiet private moment to talk without interruption, let him know he's still loved and accepted. This will go a long way in accepting any behavior rules you feel appropriate regarding masturbation. You could start off by simply acknowledging what happened and accept the fact he's growing up and needs support, encouragement and patience. Then it is up to the both of you to set the boundaries around privacy and masturbation.
I'd be interested in how it turns out.
Good luck
2007-12-22 18:38:13 · answer #5 · answered by Gary M 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nothing. Unless he was doing it in the living room where his younger siblings could walk in on him, I wouldn't worry about it.
If there is an issue of younger siblings or privacy I would explain to him that masturbating is a normal thing to want to do, but it is a private thing.
Masturbation is a very normal way for a person to explore their sexuality and their sex organs without being involved in sex with another person. It is a healthy thing to do, it wont hurt him.
2007-12-21 03:36:50 · answer #6 · answered by monsterbabys3mom 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Nothing. If he says something to you about it simply say it's normal, no biggie, but it is something he should do in private. I'd rather catch my son masturbating then with another girl at age 13. It's healthy and we all do it!!
2007-12-21 03:39:58 · answer #7 · answered by lil_hem_n_va 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
absolutely nothing. The most important thing is not to freak out about it and make him feel like its wrong. Its a natural part of growing up. All boys do it! ( most of them anyway.) The only time you should be concerned is if he is doing it in front of other people. He is a teenager. Respect his privacy. If it concerns you, let him know you dont think it is appropriate to do it while you are at home wandering about his personal space.
2007-12-21 03:38:32 · answer #8 · answered by dirttrackgirl_77 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
knock on the door next time.
I'm sure it's not the first time he's done self sex, it's just the first time he's gotten caught.
Don't make it an issue just tell him that is something personal for him to do alone.
I have caught my 14 y/o several times doing that and I remind him to just lock the door.
I have learned to knock first before coming into his room.If he yells out that he's busy,I know what he's up to....better than being a 14 y/o dad right !
2007-12-24 07:24:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why on earth might you even think of of punishing himfor something it fairly is organic? or perhaps worse.....why might you're taking into consideration observing him? Are you a troll or purely a creep? enable it pass. For goodness sake, truthfully to goodness you may submit to in suggestions this discovery?
2016-11-23 19:41:28 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you mean punishment wise, don't. but yeah, now is the time to have the sex talk with him. everyone's curious about their bodies at one point or another. PS- these days, be glad that's he's doing that now, and you didn't catch him doing some girl lol ( if he's 13 of course )
2007-12-21 04:27:17 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋