Girls - do you think there are any decent guys out there?

Question

In my experience they are all scared of commitment and only after one thing, I'm becoming a man hater :( lol xxx

Yes I used to go for the bad boys but not anymore, I have went for nice guys but still got no where, and I'm not the problem I'm a normal nice girl :p but being nice doesn't seem to cut it these days it's never good enough, you can't win, if you sleep with them u never hear from them and if u don't u still don't hear from them..

Guys - this was a question for the ladies so back off with ur nasty replies, thanks!

Answer 1

Hi there, at the risk to shooting myselft in the foot, I just want to say this to you.

If you keep going after love and keep trying to seek the man of your dreams, you'll never find him. And the reason for this, you have created an image of the person you would like to be with which kind of limits the possibilities if you know what I mean. We all tend to do this and as a result limit our own chances of finding true love. So one solution is to be totally open to the possibilities of what your soul mate will be like. That in itself is quite a difficult step.

And the second reason is that if you keep chasing after a butterfly, it will always elude you. But notice how if you sit quitely and content with you life, that butterfly will in due course come sit on your shoulder. Without sounding somehwat cliche here, this is infact a very true concept.

The bottom line is that if you keep going after love, you're not going to find it. The way to find love is to go about your life living it to the full, being available to the possibilites and give as much of love as you can if its various forms.

I wish all the best.

Take care

Answer 2

Hi. I'm not writing this to get best answer, as I know I won't. I just want to share the truth.

So you came across some bad guys in your time. But running from the problem won't make it go away. Spend more time figuring guys out. Try to understand why men do things. Make friends with guys, the more the better. You don't need to get into a relationship with a guy to learn about him.

And above all else realise that just like women, no 2 guys are the same. Sure we all have instincts that drive us to do things, which you may or may not like. There are ways to work with it though. Because smart girls figure guys out to their advantage, without getting hurt. They learn when to trust a man, and when not to. There are times when it is right to do both of these. The biggest step you can make in looking after yourself in deciding to be a smart girl, and things will fall into place in time.

Answer 3

Another one for the group then. There seems to be a lot of man haters about these days. There are nice guys out there but you have to know the right ways and places to look for them. The ones that you are looking for you won't find down a nightclub or through the friend of a friend (or on the Internet before you start thinking that I'm another greaseball who's coming on to you).

Answer 4

Well, it depends by what you mean by decent. I know-I feel that way too so you're not the only one who feels this way. I guess I have come to accept this about the majority of men-I mean they're men-they are wired to be horny bastards, unfortunately. I find it pathetic really. But there is still a tiny part of me-an ounce of hope, that someday I will meet a man who will change my mind! Of course, I'm not holding my breath. I seriously think that women are going to eventually stop marrying all together someday and this trend is already happening, because we simply will not put up with men's mediocrity and their antics and stupid behavior. Anyway, have a little hope! lol. Men are choosing to get married everyday and it could happen for you someday-if that is what you really want.

Answer 5

It sounds to me that you are very fussy and want something you can't have, i.e a heterosexual man who acts like a woman. Not all men are scared of commitment and 'are only after one thing'.
Have you ever even considered the possibility that in fact it may be your own fault and that you are not seen as a 'decent girl' or 'suitable girlfriend material' by any of the men you may have met?
It makes me smile that a lot of sad single women blame Men as the reason they are single. Isn't there a possibility that it's actually their own fault??

Men and Women are different in many, many ways. Learn this and learn to compromise and try to accept and possibly even understand the differences and you won't go far wrong.

Answer 6

There are decent guys out there (like me :D) but I am guessing the problem is you are only ATTRACTED to the dangerous/bad boy/'f'em and chuck'em' type.

That is why I think you are becoming bitter towards all of us men. The ones you are feeling attraction for are not necessarily the ones who are gonna be good for you with regards to commitment.

EDIT: OK, reading that again you say you are looking for commitment and that they are all scared. That sounds to me like you are coming on too strong and expecting too much too soon, it can scare people away. Maybe the best thing to do is take things slower with each one and just see what happens, its usually the best way.

Answer 7

Right commitment no but going after one thing usually... :) Don't become a man hater though there is someone good out there for you I guess waiting is the best option because once you find someone worth it they are the most wonderful thing to have.

Answer 8

About 80% of men are very decent and want committment as well. But you appear to be locating te 20% that aren't. And if you think you have to provide sex for committment you are mistaken. It should always be te other way around. But it is nature for girls to seek out te handsomer guys with more money to spend (or credit cards) and these are the guys that are the classics you stated.

Answer 9

There are many, many decent guys out there.

They're the ones that you usually reject in favor of the "bad boys" that you really prefer.

This isn't rocket science. If you want the decent guy, choose the decent guy, if you want the bad boy, choose the bad boy.

Answer 10

I think the problem lies with you for being so damn naive. Being a man, I can spot a bad 'un a mile off! I dare say many women without judgement problems can too.