Need your help. I feel in love with a man that has tourettes...?

Question

I feel in love with a man i did not know had tourettes. He told me after i saw him shaking his head and blinkin a strange manner in our second date

I should of broken it up. But I was hooked i liked him too much.

One day he cried and told me how hard it was to have it. I cried too. Cause it broke my heart.

So I reaseach, studied and developed a program. It worked. It was working making him better there were less head shaking and eye blinking I was feeling releived as some times it can get bad and stressess me out.

But just a few days ago. He stopped.He has now gone back to drinking coffee and doing things which make his tourettes worse.

He has asked me to love him the way he is. But i then say how could you give up on something that was making you better? How could you give up on something that might cure you? As sometimes it stress me out cause i have to comfort him

whos right here? I am being unrenable or is he been selfish? and not thinking about his partner?

Thanks guys we have been having arguments about this lately because I feel like his not really considering my feelings specially when he starts shaking his head uncontrolably in public and i have to calm him down.

This is reduced by 90% on the program.
he has continually been saying I am the woman for him that he wants to marry me but then I think I love him so much but i deserve to live a life not caring all the time for someone or full of stress. but i love him so much. i can't break up with him. we rae best friends. But i need to think if although i love him so so much can live like this foever?.....should i break up with him? or stick it out?

Answer 1

Only you can truly know if you have it in you to love this man, as is, forever. The love of my life has MS. I knew about it before I even met him. A mutual friend introduced us and we hit it off immediately. After about a month of dating and already being madly inlove with this man, he asked me to research MS so that I would know what I was in for. I did as he asked but made it clear to him that I would not be running away from him because of things that may happen with his disease. I had my chance at the beginning to run and instead I sat down and had the best conversation ever! I know things won't always be easy and the people around you won't always support your decision to be with someone who faces challenges every day. There are days when we cancel dates because he can't walk, have to leave the mall because he's getting too weak, his memory will fail him for no reason at all, and many other things that can happen unexpectedly. I love him for who he is and not for the things he can do physically. He has taught me to slow down and appreciate life, something I never did before. I am a better person for knowing and loving him. Good luck to you, I hope your heart leads you in the right direction!!

Answer 2

Tourettes is lifelong and there is not a cure. It is a Neurological condition. Stress can increase tics, so it is good that you can help to reduce stress.

But don't be fooled. If you think that you can provide a life-long marriage without stress, you'd be the first human to ever do this! It would be a miracle.

The thing that was "making him better" is only making him seem "normal" in your opinion. You need to love him for WHO he is. Who he is is so much more than his physical condition. It takes a great amount of patience to live with someone with Tourettes. Do you have it? If not, you are doing him a disservice by try to change him into something he's not.

What if you developed an illness later in life that required him to care for you? How would you feel if he agreed to only care for you if he could do it in a way that makes him comfortable to be around you? Or that made it less embarrassing to be out in public with you?

True love is not bound by the physical. As you grow older, you'll come to realize this. People who love each other care for each other, no matter what.

Answer 3

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
Need your help. I feel in love with a man that has tourettes...?
I feel in love with a man i did not know had tourettes. He told me after i saw him shaking his head and blinkin a strange manner in our second date

I should of broken it up. But I was hooked i liked him too much.

One day he cried and told me how hard it was to have it. I cried too. Cause it...

Answer 4

It's not likely that it would cure him, but I understand that it is hard to accept that he is unwilling to stay with a program that was helping to alleviate his symptoms. I would think that he would be eager to stay with it, if it helped to control the head shaking, and eye blinking. Maybe he finds it too stringent and hard to stay on? It is not fair to judge someone until you have personally walked it their shoes. I wish you both well.

Answer 5

You should let him be by himself for a few days. See if he wants to try again once he's remembered what life was like
without you. He'll get off his butt, and try after that.
If he doesn't, he's too lazy and doesn't want to improve himself for you. Hence, he doesn't love you like he should.

Answer 6

if he knows how hard it is to find a partner with his problem then he should appreciate u and how youre trying to help him..it benefits him and makes you more comfortable with his condition, so i think you are right....you;re not asking him to stop because of selfish reasons, youre just trying to help and make it more comfortable for both of you

Answer 7

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Answer 8

It won't cure him. There is no cure. It's genetic. But I think he should keep doing it if it was helping. To relieve the stress for you and him.

Answer 9

u just tryna make it less harder for him to deal with u not being selfish u just help, but he need to accept that help and stop not believing tell him it will get better if he let you help him just talk to him about how u feel

Answer 10

Just like him for who he is sounds like a good man!