Why do I feel so lonely?????????HELP?

Question

I've always admired my friends's relationships. Their's are usually very stable and long term some for 4 to 5 years. I'm always the one that is either without a boyfriend or changing boyfriends. I'm really tired of it and I'm ready to be stable with one person for the next few years. I'm tired of back and forth in relationships. I can't see the problem and I don't believe the problem is me. I'm always the one getting hurt. It seems to me the guys don't flock to me unless its some creep. EEEW!!! If its not a "hook up" by one of my friends I usually don't find a boyfriend. I don't like to look for a guy I prefer them to look for me but right about now I feel pretty desperate. I really want to be in a relationship right now. I feel really lonely. What do I do? PLEASE PLEASE HELP!!!!

Answer 1

Listen, girl. i would like to be 5'9" and weigh 110 pounds and 24 years old again, but wishing does not make it so. You didn't mention how old you were. Relationships are very special. They don't always come along when you want them. You have to be yourself, grow as an individual, develop your interests, set future individuals goals, and let things happen naturally. We have to learn to love ourselves before we can love anyone. Don't take the first thing that comes along. Being desparate will make you vulnerable and an easy target to get hurt. Rely on your self respect. Be in control. Don't let others determine your happiness. Happiness is a choice.
Relax. You will find someone who will appreciate you for who you are. Every thing in good time.

Answer 2

Well, let me tell you this.

My cousin and I were in the same situation you are in. The difference between her and I is that I didn't care about how cute he was or what kind of car he was driving and all the material things. She did. That got her in a lot of trouble because the guys she would date only wanted one thing.... im sure you know what im talking about. As soon as they got it they were out.

We wen't out one day and I met a wonderful guy who I married by the way.

She is in a relationship right now with a guy who doesn't seem that nice..... i've heard so many ugly things about him that it aint even funny.

The sad thing is that she has this beautiful baby girl and is yet again pregnant. She was so desperate to find some one that she didn't care if he was an a** h**e.

To make the long story short.... take your time to find someone who is worth it. Don't give it up too soon. Give some one who is not your type a chance. You never know if he can be THE ONE!

I know I did.... And I did find THE ONE!

Answer 3

First of all guys feel more secure with a girl that isn't desperate for a relationship. Those who do are usually insecure themselves and are prone to be abusive.
Take time to regain your self confidence and esteem. Pursue an interest-a guy with the same interest just may pop up there. Don't sell yourself short. Become as self sufficient and independent as possible. Be a whole person your self to find a whole worthy guy. Be your own best friend. Be prepared to walk if the guy doesn't treat you with the respect you deserve. It is far better to be alone then to be hooked up with a creep. It is also less lonely when you like yourself enough to not take crap from some guy. 8:)

Answer 4

The best thing you really need to do to increase your odds of finding someone is to get out of the house more often. The guys aren't going to knock on your door and ask if you are single and are willing to date them. You need to expand your social circles. Get involved in activities that will enable you to do this outside of frequenting the drinking establishments.

Take a good look at your life right now. What do you normally do during the day that allows me to meet people of the opposite sex? If all you do is go to work and come home, then your odds of meeting someone is very minimal. Continue to be open to "hook ups" from your friends, but also exhaust other ways and means of finding guys.

Here are a few good places to find us:

1) Church
2) Sporting Good Stores
3) Electronic Stores
4) Hardware Stores
5) Coffee Shops and bookstores
6) Colleges and Universities
7) Volunteer groups and political organizations.

Answer 5

Right now you are not in the right state of mind to be in a relationship. You will end u with the sme kind of guy. The thing is there are a lot of no good men out there. You don't know how to weed them out yet. You need a focus in your life that is not men. Like school or following some dream that you've always wanted to follow. You need to know what you are willing to deal with and what you are not willing to deal with in a relationship and get to know yourself a little better. Learn to be happy without a man. When you're not worried about them the right one usually comes along.

Answer 6

OKay, first of all, when you feel lonely and desperate like this, it's really when you won't get a boyfriend. These things usually happen when you least expect it. A guy can usually sense loneliness, they tend to go for the outgoing girls who aren't even looking! Start going out, find new hobbies, whether it be sports, but get dedicated to something that makes you happy, and then, when you least expect it, they'll notice your vibrance and happiness, and there ya go!

Answer 7

If you want THEM to come to you, then you gotta make yourself more open, more availible. Try going to bars or somewhere with alot of singles. SOMEONE is bound to find you and atleast talk. =] Dont worry, just give it some time and it'll be ok. Maybe your rushing into things. But dont give up, You'll find that special someone one day. Or if you're in school im sure theres alot of other guys out there that would want you^^ Good luck, Im rooting for you.

Answer 8

First you have to think that you are amazing and that you're too good for guys (but in a good way). Don't feel bad for yourself.

And if you're still friends with any of your exes talk to them about what they feel like didn't work in your relationship.

If you feel like you have nothing to offer a guy is going to think you have nothing to offer. Attitude really affects everything.

Answer 9

you can't rush getting into a relationship or you just end up with sorry excuses for men. You've got to put yourself out there and let people see the real you. hang out with your friends more, go to social functions, parties, anything will do.

Answer 10

the problem is that you didn't find the right person yet, it's not your problem , it just fate, he is there and looking for you too, but you need to be patient, coz you need stable relationship, so don't be in hurry or you will have only quick relationship that never last, go have fun, and don't look for him, coz he will look for you.