I have a new co-worker who loves to stop by and stay for hours... She isn't catching any of the hints I have given her. She is actually here now :( I don't mind her coming by but not every day all day! HELP!!!!!!
2007-12-18 10:33:10 · 12 answers · asked by Grits 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
tell her u have work u have to do and politly make a gesture away or u can say u have to go somewhere
2007-12-18 10:41:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is coming to your desk, there is an easy solution. Just tell her you have a lot of work to do and you've noticed people (including the boss) paying attention to how much time she is spending at your desk - and you don't want either one of you to get into trouble. Tell her you can talk on break and lunch, but that you can't chat during the day.
If it's your home she's invading, that will be more difficult. You can't really hint with people, sometimes, but kindness and diplomacy can help. Tell her that you have to have some kind of privacy and that, if she would like, you will set up a day every week that she can come by and the two of you can chat. Also, suggest that you schedule events (like shopping trips or coffee bar afternoons) occasionally. Tell her you sren't cutting her out completely, but you need some space. She might get upset, but I asure you, if she does, then this has happened to her before and she will either need to become more polite or get used to being pushed away.
2007-12-18 18:48:23 · answer #2 · answered by Cindy H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is coming to your house, just don't answer the door! I hate it when people just drop in. There is no reason why you have to put up with this. If she asks later where you were, make an excuse that you were in the shower and didn't hear the door. Or just tell her you weren't home.
I don't like lying to people, but sometimes you have to be less than truthful with ones like her.
If she starts calling first, tell her you were just leaving. You are not obligated to entertain her!
OR, if you can do it, just tell her that you aren't getting anything done with company every day, so from now on, you will have to make plans when you two are going to get together.
2007-12-19 06:56:46 · answer #3 · answered by Cat Lover 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's a couple of suggestions:
- Just tell her you're very busy and don't have time to chat right now. Then maybe you can meet up later after work to catch up on things.
- Since she seems to have so much free time, why not ask her to help you with some work you're falling behind on since she's hanging out in your cube?
- When she shows up, get up and go to the bathroom. If she follows you, then take your time in the stall and see if she waits for you in the ladies room.
- Put on your headphones (if allowed) and ignore her when she arrives in your cube to chat. Hopefully, that will give her a hint that you need to concentrate on work and not on gossip.
2007-12-18 18:42:35 · answer #4 · answered by koiboy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah it's so hard, but next time you come be a little off with her and (although it's quite rude) be unfriendly, therefore she won't feel so comfortable 'stopping by' for hours at a time when she recognises she is not wanted...if all else fails
TELL YOUR BOSS!!
OR (if you're not a meanie and want to be nice)...just tell her, look, I think you're great, but we have SO much fun together that I'm starting to think i'm not doing the work I'm supposed to be doing, so do you mind leaving this for after hours, I'm behind already?
Tell it like it is, you're only hurting yourself
2007-12-18 18:49:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people have to be told in plain language what is acceptable. Tell her that you need her to 'call first' to see if you are available. Tell her that while you like her, you do not like for 'anybody' to just drop in on you. If she argues with you, simply say, 'You can say what you want, but this is my personality, and I'm not comfortable with a spontanous 'thing'. Don't take it personal - I feel this way across the board." Good luck.
2007-12-18 18:40:30 · answer #6 · answered by Mercedes 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Assuming she is coming to your home. You might tell her that you enjoy the time you spend with her. However you also have things that you have to do on your own. That sometimes you just want to chill by yourself. Perhaps you can arrange a day or two a week where you all hang out together.
2007-12-18 18:38:24 · answer #7 · answered by Spread Peace and Love 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm surprised that the boss has not asked him/her if she intends to do some work or is she retired. You have to say someone on the lines of look I'm very busy so can we talk later
2007-12-18 18:49:03 · answer #8 · answered by Scouse 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well your hints aren't working so start saying "Jane, i'm really busy right now" every time she comes by. Hopefully she gets it.
2007-12-18 18:37:32 · answer #9 · answered by Melissa 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell her your water supply is off and that you need to go to her house. If you visit her and say all day every day she may get the message.
2007-12-18 19:24:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋