Should atheists pray for dying loved ones?

Question

Should someone who does not believe in any gods waste what little precious time they have left with a loved one praying? Personally, I find that suggestion to be absolutely disgraceful. However, Earnest suggests they do just that: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071218132019AA7XMdM&r=w&pa=FZptHWf.BGRX3OFMiDxVUeVBH_OArtqLMVaNp1SGLKa2HvIGvA--&paid=answered#QsFIIEHdVEZboJUiOwiU If you are given a limited amount of time with a loved one, shouldn't you do something that is meaningful to you - like share memories or talk them through their feelings? Would YOU suggest anyone waste time praying if they feel it is useless? Or would you suggest they get and give the most in those final fleeting moments?

What is the compassionate option?

Answer 1

You are absolutely right.

We prayed hard every day for five years when my young cousin was diagnosed with cancer and, of course, it didn't make an iota of difference.

When my father was dying, he needed to talk about his life. He went over the major decisions he'd made, seeking reassurance that he'd mostly made good ones. He wanted to know that his family were happy and the best thing we could do was to listen and to reassure him that he'd made us happy and that we loved him.

The worst thing I ever read on the internet was from a girl whose atheist mother had died. She was a born again Christian who chose to spend the last hours of her mother's life crying and haranguing her mother to accept Jesus so that she could be saved and go to Heaven.

It's hard to imagine a worse death than the one that Christian inflicted on her mother..

ETA: I've just gone and read Earnest's question - what a nasty piece of work!

Answer 2

Praying is a alien act for an atheist. Why would anyone expect an atheist to "pray" when that is something that those who believe in the manmade religions do. It is disgraceful, distasteful and rude to make such a suggestion. Interesting how christians can suggest we do things that are "wrong" to us, and it is ok, but if we suggest they don't believe in something, we are attacking them.
As far as dealing with the dying, being there and talking to them is the only thing that is important anyway, doesnt matter whether you have religion or not. Certainly if that person is deeply religious and someone prays for them, you stand reverently by and don't shout out how stupid it really is, but then we atheists are better mannered than that anyway.

Answer 3

i fail to see the purpose of praying for a loved one.

hypothetically IF god existed as the christians say, he would have a plan for everyone, not only that but he would be all knowing and unchanging. thus praying will have no effect on the overall outcome of the event.

*shrug*

perhaps it is time better spent with that person. sharing those last few moments together?

Answer 4

Do as you please. You really do not know what you will do until you are in that situation.
I've been there several times. EVERYONE in my immediate family has died. One was an identical twin.

My twin wanted to pray. I wanted to give her hope that she would not die. She was a Christian, as am I.

Dying is not romantic. It is horrible. I lost half of my soul.


Don't pray for your loved one at all. Share happy memories. Do whatever makes you happy.

I would NEVER suggest that you pray about anything at all.

Answer 5

No, no longer quite, someone who desired to do it might, but an try to lead prayer, would seem like an opportunist attempt to unfold the religion. I live in the UK, Tony Blair needed to preserve his faith beneath wraps or be idea a "nutter". If we had known he used to be "guided via God" he would not ever had been elected. There is a general mistrust of religion here, as being motivated by means of selfish causes and being a motive of manipulation and strife. We've got simply settled Northern eire, that used to be kept alive by using donations from the us (thanks for the murders), although the efforts of invoice Clinton and TB have delivered peace (so thanks for that). Essentially we do not need divisive secretarian religious politics over here, and that goes for Christians, Muslims, JW, FSM, and every other ars**oles who consider they have got the answer and we must pay attention.

Answer 6

I was deeply respectful of a Christian woman, who died not too long ago. She had a heart attack at 43 and it was really surprising. I went to her funeral, and everyone around me bowed their heads to pray. Even though I do not believe in God, I had the decency to bow my head along with everyone else. At that point, it was about respect and love for her, not God. I may not have said the words, or prayed to God, but I showed my support for her family and showed that even with my beliefs (or lack thereof), I loved her dearly, and she will be missed.

Answer 7

Maybe the theists should start praying to the FSM and invisible pink unicorn for support, too. Why just stop at the God they believe in with the kind of logic that questioner was presenting?

Answer 8

we can be compassionate without praying! I save ppls life for a living ,I am in that position 24/7 - and found myself with an only child with cancer this year! -HA-I've been around the block and praying hasn't been part of it! touching,speaking smiling yeahhh , that is what they need!

Answer 9

If you mean praying *with* the dying person, its no skin off my nose. Spending time with someone, even when they want to do something dumb... its still spending time with them.

If they ask me to pray for them, well, that would depend on the person. I wouldn't actually pray, but I might lie to them to make them feel better.

Answer 10

I'm not even going to read your question. Prayer has been proven to do absolutely nothing, have minimal effects (makes em happy i suppose) and in some has had a 1-2% more likelihood of death.